Whats The Most Pathetic Lie Youve Ever Told To Get Laid?

Females that are hot as fuck usually cause this, I once had act like a jackass to attract this girl. She said I was a pussy if I didn't follow and i don't back down so I did it, she sorta had issues so I didn't pursue after her. 

 

'That was amazing...' Sad in the most ridiculous adolescent voice ever. After the worst sex I have ever had, and hopefully ever will have... It was kind of sad But hey, doesn't matter, had sex

 

I have a car

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"I'll pay you tomorrow"

 

You caught my eye a long time ago

You're absolutely gorgeous

You are very special to me

 

I know what I'm doing.

 

"I'll be your boyfriend"

 

...and goddamned it, it fucking worked!

 

Ill give you 200$

 

I told a chick on a blind date that i was a business owner.

 

I don't lie. Ill fight a lier and a thief anyday though

Ill be back in an hour or so
I'm going to where the pretty flowers grow

 

We can get married and have babies I won't tell anyone I know you exist

 

I never had to lie. Shit just happened.  I did, however, have a serviceman once tell me that he was going to a dangerous place and may never come back and could I please have sex with him that night because he might die.  Yes.  I'm aware that's a run-on sentence.  But it was verbatim how he said it to me.  And yes it worked and no he didn't die.  Bastard.  Although the homecoming was really nice.  There were handcuffs and various other accoutrement.
 
I knew a couple of guys in our local volunteer fire department who claimed they were sterilized by radiation and couldn't father any children.  They ended up with the nicknames Sterile Darryl and No Gland Dan after they tried several attempts at bedding the local female population.   I honestly don't think either of them got laid until marriage.  They weren't the  brightest turnips in the patch.     

 

"im a virgin", lol, i whispered it into this girls ear at some dubstep bar thingy in quebec city, she was like "I Know, I don't care". i have no idea why i said it, but it worked haha

 

 
LOL Sterile Darryl  had me fucking rolling in the floor.
 
I don't lie to get laid, hence why I almost never get laid. lol.

 

But for real, I haven't lied to get laid since I was in high school. It never worked then anyways, being a stud is the best way to go about wooing broads.

 

"I'm a virgin"... wait that's not a lie that's the truth hoping to lose it before joining the Coast Guard

"In any civilized society, it is every citizen's responsibility to obey just laws. But at the same time, it is every citizen's responsibility to disobey unjust laws."
~Martin Luther King Jr.