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The bleach penis strategy

Discussion in 'Apprentice Marijuana Consumption' started by Duelix, Feb 28, 2012.

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  1. #1 Duelix, Feb 28, 2012
    Well I'm getting drug testing by rents (I'm 19) randomly. My dad will probably be watching, but it's only going to be a CVS first check drug test. My dad doesn't stare at my penis, however, and turns around right when I have my dick out.

    So I was wondering if I stored a half-teaspoon of powdered bleach and taped it to my balls and then poured it out into the sample, would it test negative? The first-check website says that bleach IS an adulterant, but would it work well enough to be relied upon?
     
  2. #2 Snowman00, Feb 28, 2012

    stick your dick into the bleach the night before for about 10 minutes...garunteed to pass.
     
  3. #3 MightyJoeJon, Feb 28, 2012
    i stopped reading at "The bleach penis strategy"
     
  4. #4 Capnfalconpunch, Feb 28, 2012
    I don't know, but I'm subscribing just to see what other people say
     
  5. #5 GodGaveUsWeed, Feb 28, 2012
    He stays in the room when you do it? Damn. Tell your dad to stop pretending he's a probation officer and to fuck off
     
  6. #6 MightyJoeJon, Feb 28, 2012
    and this [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fj4c8FeqR4s]"No! Drink the bleach!" - YouTube[/ame]
     
  7. #7 1bakedpotato, Feb 28, 2012
    Just tell him you smoke weed
     
  8. #8 h i g h, Feb 28, 2012
    half teaspoon of ramen noodle chicken roast flavored powder mix works better. trust me
     
  9. #9 HxCurt, Feb 28, 2012
  10. #10 Kiefsweat, Feb 28, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 28, 2012
    [​IMG]

    only posted it cause its fucking halarious btw.
     
  11. #11 Duelix, Feb 28, 2012
    The issue is that I GOT CAUGHT with weed and I got caught so many times that they find it necessary to be VERY VERY sure. Which sucks dick...

    I don't wanna quit toking
     
  12. #12 jleonelli13, Feb 28, 2012
    you're 19, tell them you smoke weed and you don't want to stop. If they're that against it try explaining why you like to smoke and why it really isn't that bad, and if that doesn't work either stop smoking or move out.
     
  13. #13 nascarfan, Feb 28, 2012
    You know....if weed is causing this many problems for you, so much so that as an adult, your parents are going to watch you take a piss test. Maybe weed isn't right for you, at this point in your life.

    It's not right for everyone, all the time.
     
  14. #14 Skyscraper, Feb 28, 2012

    Oh man I love you, +rep
     
  15. #15 TheStoner420, Feb 28, 2012
    ur 19, u dont even have to take the drug test
     
  16. #16 frankenfish, Feb 28, 2012
    if he's living in their house he still has to follow their rules
     
  17. #17 GreenCrackYUM, Feb 28, 2012
    Your dad watches you? That is fucking weird.

    Are you sure he watches you because he wants to make sure you don't cheat? Or could there be another reason? If you are picking up what I am putting down.
     
  18. #18 Duelix, Feb 28, 2012
    So I don't cheat. As said he doesn't directly look at my penis and I'm uncircumcized so I can hide stuff in there
     
  19. #19 Skyscraper, Feb 28, 2012

    This ^

    OP what you don't realise is you're not peeing inside a normal cup. It's got a video camera in the bottom of it for your dad's personal use. :hide:
     
  20. #20 GreenCrackYUM, Feb 28, 2012
    LOL!!!!

    Hiding things in your dick skin, nice.

    It's still weird that he goes in the bathroom with you. I would never let my dad do that. And I used to have a 67 year old lady watch my dick as I pissed, for probation. She had to watch my piss leave my dick.
     
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