i get pissed off when i am having a conversation (or rather..not having a conversation..?) with a person who seems to have a need to talk constantly. i think that sometimes it is nice to shut up, i really do. i may be weird, but when i have nothing to say, i won't anything rather than just continue making bullshit smalltalk or talk about different movies and whatnot. it is not even the talking that annoys me, it is the reaction of the person if there is no talking going on. the person suddenly becomes uncomfortable, the whole thing becomes weird... and that is where the pointless talking comes in. or it doesn't come in, but it's still weird and it is not enjoyable for the person to hang out with me. neither for me, nor for the person. SO WHY MUST WE FEEL WEIRD WHEN THERE IS NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT? just stop talking for a short while, when sometimes comes up (something interesting and worth talking about), it will sound interesting and natural. a conversation shouldn't be forced and like..artificial. if you still have nothing to talk to, then fuck it.. smoke a bowl or something, you will have things to talk about sorry for the rant, just venting.
I agree. I suck at small talk thats forced. Like seriously bad at it because I just feel wrong, as if I am not being myself if i force talk...and I just can't do that Forced small talk all stems from some insecurity or fear
+rep man, i can relate to that 100%, ive been analyzing the very same thing for a while now. idk why its like that but it is. people need to just chill. i am a hypocrite though, because sometimes i do the exact same thing just so I dont feel uncomfortable. the whole idea of filling in beautiful silence in such a hectic life where we gotta live up to peoples dumb standards and always be doing something with pointless chitter chatter is prepostorous. i think people are scared of themselves.
yeah man i know what you mean. If theres nothing to say i don't say anything, when there is i say it. I always associate this concept with pulp fiction, you know the scene in the restraunt with John Travola and Uma Thermin?
Well great everyone on the spirituality forum of GrassCity doesn't feel compelled to fill in silence with blabber... as for the other 99% of people there is to talk to in my social circle....
i hate to break it to you but youll probably have to learn how to make small talk and bull shit with people once you get a real job and have to interact with superiors in the work place and even otehr co workers (who lets be honest you wouldnt hang out with if you didnt work together) youre going to have to learn to do it and like it or at least be able to put up with it
Ya small talk is really boring and i am extremely random and people find it weird sometimes when i get into a deep conversation with them and i don't know them. I just don't see the point in talking about what my major is or other questions that come up in small talk that i answer every fucking day. So i just change the subject and if they don't like it they can never talk to me again for all i care.
Got it much the same way hendrix. I am not a big fan of smalltalk. I much prefer to listen, and interject where I got something to add, or feel like steering the conversation to a more interesting topic, than just blabber on just to keep my jawmuscles and tongue occupied
True, some people just want to talk and talk. Turn it into an opportunity. If the other person wants to dominate the conversation, then let them, but you can take control while he's thinking he's in control. Direct the conversation and ask questions about things you are interested in. The other person will give you two-paragraph answers as usual but if you seem very interested in what he says (and at some point you actually may be) then you will be able to interrupt without seeming rude, because after all you are just dying to hear that person's thoughts. You can give the other person the attention he craves and you can at least probe his mind without him even knowing.
You and me both buddy, you should check out my topic that is pertaining to this subject. I covered alot of stuff. http://forum.grasscity.com/spirituality-philosophy/339773-listeners-talkers.html
my bad actually, stoner's memory, i remember your thread now. i should have just posted there, you had a proper thread going on there actually, i loved some of the replies lol i know what you mean. you kinda sound like an evil genius though the word "probe" is so ugly... i prefer "analyze"
Lol I do that when I'm with a group of people I find superficial, especially when I'm high... I'll just talk to myself in my mind I think of it as my conscious mind talking to my unconscious mind and it's pretty cool and the majority of the time I find myself more interesting than the people I'm with.
No problem hendrix, not trying to take over your thread or anything, I just wanted to show you mine since we both have the same thoughts.