I liked these .........thought Uall like'em to..... Why was he born so beautiful Sung to the tune of some hymn. Dunno which one. Why was he born so beautiful Why was he born at all He's no fucking use to anyone He's no fucking use at all He should be publicly pissed on, He should be publicly shot (bang, bang), He should be tied to a urinal, And left there to fester and rot. So, SMOKE chug-a-lug SMOKE chug-a-lug SMOKE chug-a-lug SMOKE!
I Used to Work in Chicago The tune is similar to "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow". Soloists volunteer for each verse during the previous by raising their beer (fist) to their forehead and are then chosen by the consensus pointing their elbows at the volunteer. Everyone sings words in capital letters. Chorus: I USED TO WORK IN CHICAGO, AN OLD DEPARTMENT STORE. I USED TO WORK IN CHICAGO, I DON'T WORK THERE ANYMORE… A woman came in for a hammer. A HAMMER FROM THE STORE? A hammer she wanted, nailed she got. AND I DON'T WORK THERE ANYMORE! OH! Repeat Chorus after each verse. (For the next verses change "A woman came in for a hammer" with the first set of words and "a hammer she wanted, nailed she got" with the second set of words after the semi colon. Note: in some cases "a woman" can be interchanged with "a man" and vise versa). A man came in for some nails; nails he wanted, screwed he got A woman came in for a screen door; a screen door she wanted, back door she got A man came in for some bread; bread he wanted, my yeast he got A woman came in for a Kit Kat; a Kit Kat she wanted, four fingers she got A man came in for a lobster, a lobster he wanted, my crabs he got A woman came in for some jewelry; jewelry she wanted, a pearl necklace she got A man came in for a job; a job he wanted, a blowjob he got A woman come in for a linguist; a linguist she wanted, cunnilingus she got A man came in for some carpet; carpet he wanted, a shag he got A woman came in for some paper; paper she wanted, a ream she got A man came in for some tile; tile he wanted, laid he got A woman came in for a ruler; ruler she wanted, 12 inches she got A man came in for a camel; a camel he wanted, humped he got A woman came in for some stamps; stamps she wanted, licked she got A man came in for some velvet; velvet he wanted, felt he got A woman came in for a fuck; a fuck he wanted, and fucked he got…and now I own the store! SOCIAL
Long as we're putting up the words to rugby songs... our bus broke down comming back from New Brunswick one year, and a guy began singing this. was quite simple, he'd sing a line, we'd repeat. "Walking 'round at mid-NIGHT! Lookin for a whore... God-damn son-of-a-bitch i couldn't find a whore. Finally found a WHORE! She was tight and thin... God-damn son-of-a-bitch i couldn't get it in. Finally got it iiIN! Wiggled it all about... God-damn son-of-a-bitch i couldn't get it out. Finally got it ooOUT! It was red and sore... The moral of the story IS to never fuck a whore! HEY!" next one i actually heard from a female the first time. (Chorus) Oh bob-a-reeba! (everyone repeats) Oh pass the whiskey! (everyone repeats) I wish that all the ladies! (everyone reapeats) Were holes in the road (repeat) And if i were a dump truck (repeat) I'd fill 'em with my load (repeat) (chorus) I wish that all the ladies! (repeat) Were pies on the shelf (you get the idea here) And if I were the baker I'd eat 'em all myself (chorus) I wish that all the ladies! Were bricks in a pile If I was a mason I'd lay 'em all like tile (chorus) I wish that all the ladies! Were bells in a tower If I were Quasimodo I'd bang 'em every hour!
dont forget the greatest rugby yell ever the shipmates name was flipper by fuck he was nippler he stuffed his arse with broken glass and circumsized a skipper [ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=srqEcHUzuys"]YouTube - Sex Pistols - Friggin' In The Riggin'[/ame]