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Rizant My Nizzles!!

Discussion in 'Seasoned Tokers' started by namron_420s, Aug 22, 2002.

  1. yes yes, i am in one hell of a ranting mood, i am not stoned no no, i just have a rapid mind that travels at*let me put my keyboard on my lap so i can type with more ergonomic comfort and not get carperal tunells sindrome of the tuneeling carepenetners fuck i messed up and im not stoned well shit*supersonic speeds, anyway, i just got done dropping a load, aka, pooping, its a lot like sneezing, except not at all, anyway, i plop a couple down, and look, and there is a little roach, the bug kind, floating and running in circles on my turd, belive me or not, i do not lie..and i swear he looked up at me and screamed, so i asked him what his problem was, and he said his two million kids took his last cracker crumb, his ninety five wives just took his last piece of cheeze, and some cat is chasing him through the woods, so he decided to hang out on a turd, i said well, why a turd, he said cuz turds are brown and he felt camoflaughed on a turd so i said join the army, they have camoflauge paint, he said ok, and then shot missles and grenades at my cat, then she joined the air force and flew planes at my mom who wears a big shirt for a night gown, what in the hell am i talkinga bout? ill tell you what im talking about, im talking about that damn roach that was floating on my turd, it was the funniest thing i have ever seen in my life, now try with me here folks, you walk into your bathroom, sit down, start pooping....ok, now your done pooping, and for reasons unknown to you, you look down, whether it be to see if you dropped something to be proud of, or scared of, or just to see if you ate peanuts or corn and didnt know it, i dont know, but anyway, you look down and see a frickin roach staring back up at you...what would you do?!..naturally you would probably do what i did, wipe my ass..no you wouldnt wipe my ass you would wipe your own ass, then flush the toilet, no, not mine, but yours, and walk away as the poor little soldier roach screams the pleasures of drowning away on a turd..imagine that, drowning on a turd..man thats gotta suck, is it just me, or did i just make a whole post about pooping?hmmmm...now for the unnecessary jumble of words in my rant, flocks of mud swarm the unsuspecting bycicle coke cans of mason jars surrounding knife paper cardboard box keyboard tennis shoe kitty kitty meow squeezebutter mcnubbin odelay mcdonalds eats burgerking watch the book as it explodes into flaming balls of water......i like everything better with the lights out and now for my conclusion, cat poop stinks, dont you hate it when the poop on the OH GOD, FUCKING HAIRBALLS SUCK ASS. our cat will hack them up int he middle of the night, just so we can fucking step on them, i promise thats what she does, oh god this rant has no comical value whatsoever..oh yeah, i talked about a roach sitting on my turd, you gotta laugh at that, if you dont, i will run naked through my shower!
     
  2. haha....damn.....ummmm......odd.
     
  3. I was reading your story about the poor little roach who was drowing on a big fat turd and i must conclude:


    THIS IS THE MOST IDIOTIC STORY I EVER READ!
    YOU IMAGINATION INSPIRES US ALL!



    You have my graditude!@#%&
     
  4. odd.....yet......odd...HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA......i love ranting, it is fun. but i really did see a roach on my turd
     

  5. Shouldn't come as a big surprise Norman, I mean doesn't every ramshackle pig farmer's cabin in Arkansas have an outhouse in the back? ;)

    Sooooooeeeeeee!!!!!! Go Hawgs!!!
     
  6. well..i think wed actually wind up bein a ramshackle cat and dog farmers cabin...and we do live in the boonies...aka way the fuck out there....and yes, you are correct in that


    WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    PIIIIIIIG!!!!!!
    SOOOOOOOOIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!



    CALL THEM HOGS!!!
     
  7. no one reads my rants anymore


    FOCK YOU ALL!!!
     
  8. Hmmmm..............Very entertaining to say the least and for the second time in my life, I am at a complete loss for words. LOL. I did get this very strange visual pic of a roach floating on a turd in the toilet screaming and begging for u not to drown him. I must smoke another bowl to erase the memory of a roach trying to bribe you to save his own life. That would be the shit though......little bugs paying u in bud to spare their life.
     
  9. I read it dick face, I was just to busy to reply. But, lucky for you I seem to have a spare moment now so here's your attention are you happy now?

    Just kidding, it's secretly me who requires constant attention from people. I crave it, I always call people and there like what and i'm like I need attention damnit.anywho back to you and your.....aaaaa.... friend, that's crazy. Roaches are fucking disgusting. They can live for like a month after you cut there head off before they die of dehydration, I never heard of one drowning on a turd before though. I guess he wanted to be the first.
     

  10. I cant help it if im a slow reader!!! ...im talking daaaaaaayyys..keep em cumming. nothing intended there. catcha naked. im mean later, later...catch yeah later.. :smoke: ;)
     
  11. Namron


    You have the makins of fine mind, when I first saw the word roach the thought popped into my mind "ah yeah how ordinary, he's gonna be like the rest of us by fishing it out, drying and smoking it" but when I actually read the message I saw it turn into a fine rant. Keep up the good work.


    Paul J Jamtgaard
     


  12. Cameo...sizzlin




    Well you know what I think normsy poo?....with all these snakes, and roaches and playing with your dillybar with pepper juice on your hands..ive come to the conclusion that you have some sort of pooping fetish....all of your stories begin with "well I was pooping"..."dropping a steamer"..."making chocolate playdough"...."herding chocolate sheep"..."squeezing chunky peanut butter"..."barfing out my ass".... "fertilizing the toilet bowl"..."putting herman to bed"... "dispensing some malted milk balls"... "making aeolian deposits"... "cooking up a fresh batch of anal butter"..."dropping some apple flakes"..."giving birth to a balogna stick"..."black banana blind eal".... "assgoblin"... "big ol' texan".... "body wax".... "butt clusters".."boo-boos"..."chocolate bread loaf"... "chewie chocolate delight"..."chubacca chunks" ..."choda"..."cigar fish"..."clinker cocky codswallop" ..."colon cannonballs"..."corn eyed butt snake"..."crapola crapsters"..."dark ketchup"..."digested crayola box" ..."doo-doo dobby dongs"..."hash browns"..."haha ham" ..."jujubees"..."lumpy fart majon"..."butt mud"..."shitsickles"..."skata"..."soil space slug"..."stinky pinky steamer"... "texas tyrant"..."splashers"..."stoolie stuff submarine"... "tangy buttnuts"..."sweet violet tahi"... "toilet twinkie"... "toy-toy tree trunks"... "to bloop".... "air out the anus"... " chucking the football"... "dump dump a dead grandma"... " play angry firefighter"... "green apple squirts"... "trout chili"... "volcanic whoopies"... "vienna squirts"...

    what was I origionally talking about again?...oh well..basically namron... to you..taking a dump is a thirty second buzzzzz
     
  13. NuBBiN


    Wow!!! Man I had no idea there were that many terms refering to the art of refreshing yourself with a number two.
    Why the research alone must be stupendous. You gotta helluva mind also (1/2 bow while keeping my eye on your left hand and right foot).


    Paul J Jamtgaard
     
  14. dizzams, im so high rite now, no ideaz wha's goin' on.

    rantizzles mah nizzles
     
  15. What about downloading, or dropping the kids off at the pool?
     
  16. what about shitting?


    and yeah, cameo....drizzlin



    thanks for the mind compliment




    they are better when im foomm
     

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