Psychosis, the Yang of Yin?

[SIZE=10pt]Greetings - I'm 47 and started smoking marijuana again last Sept. It has been beneficial in a number ofways, but[/SIZE] I had to stop 30 days ago for reasons I'll explain in a moment, but first a little background[SIZE=10pt].  [/SIZE]
 
[SIZE=10pt]I experimented as a young teen but stopped a couple years later because I began to experience anxiety and paranoia. Since then, the 30 years between, on occasion the mood struck again, but[/SIZE] the results were never pleasant. A difference has been though, as an adult if I found a quiet place I could relax and move through the anxiety by rationalizing my circumstance.
 
[SIZE=10pt]So, last Sept I tried marijuana again, but[/SIZE] on this occasion the experience was delightful, and living on Vancouver Island I was (am) fortunate to have access to medical marijuana. So I did a little research, saw a Dr and spoke of anxiety and away I went.
 
[SIZE=10pt]I lost weight, my blood pressure came down and I was a calm, contemplative and considerate person. Not that I wasn't prior but now I was really on a roll. I learned to love music again, spent time reading, gained an appreciation for the arts and learned to ride a unicycle (alright, I[/SIZE] already knew how to ride a unicycle) but the point is things were really good. Another unexpected and delightful benefit was I had nearly no desire to drink alcohol and prior to Sept I had been a heavy drinker for nearly 10 years.
 
[SIZE=10pt]Now there were[/SIZE] the usual memory impairments that people speak of. I was forgetful, lacked focus and occasionally giggled at funerals. Kidding aside, the memory thing was quite disconcerting.. It's worth noting at this point that now that I'm 30 days "dry" - full facility has returned, as has my tummy.. Another observation was my sleep cycle changed; I was tired in the afternoon, but attributed this to staying up later on mostly Sativa and reading, playing chess and generally enjoying my inner space.
 
[SIZE=10pt]Then in early April I noticed a different feeling, something which alarmed me. In what can be best described as mild psychosis I began to feel like my perception was slightly skewed or as I tried to explain to my wife, "I felt out of phase” Use at the point was 20-25 grams/month and again mostly Sativa[/SIZE]
 
[SIZE=10pt]I have a history of mental illness in my family, my brother was schizophrenic, and I've experienced general anxiety since being a teen. That said, I've been on SSRI's since 06 and have had great success mingling that with booze to attain a darn good life. That said, booze is very unforgiving and I'm tired of feeling like crap the first hour of most days. [/SIZE]
 
[SIZE=10pt]So.. I'm highly motivated to find some balance that mitigates the mild psychosis while still offering the cornucopia of coolness.[/SIZE]
 
[SIZE=10pt]I'm cautious considering my hereditary and would also like to avoid the memory and focus issues..[/SIZE]
 
[SIZE=10pt]Is there anyone that can speak to my predicament? [/SIZE]

 

@ Olde Smokey. Funny guy, but looks aren't everything.

Perhaps I should rephrase and repost to capture a larger audience.



Sent from my iPad using Grasscity Forum