*I Apologize in advance that this is long. I just had to rant.\t For as long as I can remember, my father has always had an issue with Alcohol. I think I found out he was an Alcoholic around when I was 13 (i'm 27 now) and since then, I've dealt with his off and on drinking. I've completely cut drinking out of my life (the occasional drink here and there, but I can seriously count on one hand how many drinks I've had this year)and I've seeked help for myself (Al-Anon). I have tried to not let his drinking control my life, which is kind of hard being that I still live at home. However last night for me was the final straw. \t So the deal in my household is simple; My Dad Isn't Allowed to Drive! My mom has her car, and I have mine. The only time my dad is allowed to drive is when Him and my Mom go out and my mom doesn't feel like driving. He isn't allowed to use my car at all. Well this past Saturday my Mom took a trip to New York, and from the second she left, my dad was drinking again (he had been sober for about 2 weeks up to this point). So yesterday my Mom was coming back into town, and I was going to use her car to pick her up from the airport. So I get in the car, and look to the right and realize that my car is gone. At this point I'm all like "AHHH SH!T my car's been stolen". However I realize that my neighbor has been outside all day working on his yard so I knew he would have seen something. So I run inside to see if my dad knew something, but I soon realized that he wasn't home. I called my sister (my car use to belong to my brother in law) and I found out that they had found a spare key as they were packing their house up to move to NY, and they gave it to my mom, who had put it away somewhere (we constantly have to hide stuff in my house because of my dad). Well once I found this out I put two and two together and realized that he took my car. So I went and picked up my mom, and when we got home, my car was back in the drive way. To say I was pissed off was an understatement. I was Livid. What made me even more mad was the fact that A) He kept saying he didn't have a key and that he hot wired the car (obvious lie) and B) that the entire time he was acting like he did nothing wrong. So with all that, I made the decision to leave (a decision that both my older sisters agreed with). However a friend of mine said that I over reacted and that it's no that big of a deal. So I come to you, fellow blades; Did I over React, or is my Anger and Decision to leave my house for a while warranted? Sorry for the long post.
Sounds like you got a bit angry, that your dad took your car, and also the fact that he was drunk. Did I get that right?
You have every right to get angry at that, sounds like you have put up with a lot more and continue to do so. It's your decision if you want to move out. If you feel that's the best thing to do, then do it. I have never lived with an alcoholic, but I'm sure it's hard. Same to you if you ever want to talk man.
That's a tough one, blade. Have you confronted him about his alcoholism? I know confrontation is not the way to go for everyone especially when it comes to addiction, but confrontation is basically the only way I know to work quickly.
You've just now decided to move out because your dad took your car one day. Not because you're 27? Personally I wouldn't be angry at all. There is no rule in my household that my dad can't drive. However, if my dad took my car while I was driving the family car I would have absolutely zero reason to even question it...
How will moving out affect your mom and her relationship with your father? Does he ever get violent? How will he be when he's alone? From what you've said, I think you should move out regardless of the answers to those questions. It seems like the healthiest thing for you to do. But be aware of the results.
I must have missed the part where you said you were 27. At that point, I'd ask myself, "why have I stayed here for so long?"
In my culture, we don't leave home until we are done with school and/or get married. I am less than a year away from graduating so I was getting in the mind set to move anyway. Yea I know 27 sounds too old to be home with your rents, but in the Indian/Indo-Caribbean culture, it's not uncommon to be home until 30