need help please respond

Discussion in 'Pandora's Box' started by glassy, Jul 13, 2006.

  1. hey guys ..i dont know what i can or cant say really so sorry if i offend anyone? but anyway heres the deal i almost had sex with this chick last night but i didnt because she didnt really know what she was doing (shes a virgin) so like i didnt get hard or anything and she tried stuff but nothing really worked cause she didnt have that "touch" i tried to get myself hard but that didnt work either since the mood was completely gone. I just wanted some input to like get her to do what she needs to do without outright telling her what to do. by the way before anyone thinks im an asshole or anything for saying this i do love her and she loves me and really wants to have sex but just doesnt know what to do at all..and if anyone has ever had sex with a virgin do they really like bleed everywhere and shit. Please respond though because im seeing her this friday and were going to try again..

    thanks
     
  2. Are you a virgin too ?

    Viagra ? Pop in a porno ? :confused_2:

    Otherwise, if she doesn't know what she's doing, you're going to have to tell her or teach her.
     
  3. Haha for some reason i imagine a 30-something year old made this post. Anyways if a girl "touching" you doesn't get you hard...you have some serious problems
     
  4. if anything, it sounds like your the one w/ the problem if you cant get hard. Sorry but i have no advice cause i dont have problems getting my tool up. Like the person 2 posts above me said, pop in a porno.
     
  5. Hey bro your situation isn't uncommon whether or not a virgin is involved. Sometimes the pressure to perform can be overwhelming, most guys won't admit when they've had a sexually embarrassing situation openly, ya know how ego operates eh? With that being said, I have to say that I'm impressed that you're being as open as you are, especially in Pandora's Box, kudos.

    My advice to you Glassy since you said that the both of you love each other is to be absolutely open and honest with her. Love is about disclosure bro, especially in a situation where both of you want to attain the highest level of intimacy possible between two people. And since she's a virgin make sure that having sex is what she wants to do right now, and if it is never be afraid to disclose what it is you want and encourage her to talk about what she wants as well. (This can be embarrassing initially but as the comfort level between the both of you increases well worth it, trust me.) Even sexually experienced people many times fail to give each other the full pleasure they've desired all because of the lack of communication. Start out your sexual lives together being open and honest or else you're going to be facing many future frustrations when it comes to sexual intercourse.

    Sadly in many of today's societies women are sent horrible messages about their bodies and how much they should be in tune with their own sexuality. Instead of being taught openness and acceptance they're relegated to sexual objects that are only there to pleasure and please men. Because of this a great many women ultimately end up unfulfilled after a sexual experience with a man. Men are more visual in terms of their sexuality and their needs not as complex as that of the woman. This works to the man's advantage but against a woman's. Try to take that into account when you get together. Make her pleasure your priority even as you want her to make your pleasure hers.

    That's my take bro, good luck.

    "For women the best aphrodisiacs are words. The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time."

    ~Isabel Allende~


    Peace.
     
  6. thanks for responding guys. No i am not a virgin and i think part of the reason is because i wasnt really comfortable (it was REALLY hot in the room and we were all sticky and stuff) but even that still didnt turn me on. I thought maybe it was just her cuz normally id be ready to go in like a couple minutes but like touching her and stuff just didnt do anything for me. I also thought (despite past experiences) that since we were both really high maybe that had something to do with it?
     
  7. Take in AK's advice, he's on top of things! :hello:
     
  8. AK covered the mental aspect of the situation great, take that advice. As for the actual sex I would take it slow, try to set the mood. Even though its a lil corny light some candles in the bedroom and play some soft music. If the mood is right it will relax both of you.

    Next Start off with some foreplay getting more and more heavy with it. ie. start off kissing, then work her clothes off and finger her a little and lightly rub her clit. Key of her, if shes breathing heavier and seems to enjoy it keep going, if not take it a little slower. this has 2 advantages, 1. you should be pretty hard pleasuring your girl like this. 2. The more she relaxes the wetter and more able to recieve she will be. After this go down on her a bit but do it gently, romantically. Massage her body lightly with your finger tips, tease her and build up some anticipation.

    By now she should be pretty ready for sex but I would ask her, in a completely non threatening, loving way "Are you ready to take this next step" or something like that. Virginity is a big thing to a lot of people and you want to make sure she is ready. If she accepts i would suggest missionary as it would allow you to control most of the movement, pace etc.

    The entire time concentrate on giving her pleasure and make sure she enjoys it. Gaze into her eyes and caress her body. Wisper sweet things to her such as "Youre my one and only" and "I love you (name here)" Try to rub her clit gently during sex if she seems to be in a little pain to give her some positive stimulation.

    Ive been told by girls that it does hurt a little bit to a lot depending on the girl the first time. It may bleed a little but Ive never experience "Gushing blood" with any virgin ive slept with.

    That said if you cant get it up, dont worry man. Its something that a lot of guys experience. Try and relax and dont focus to much on getting hard, it will just make it more difficult. If you think it is a problem with you (health wise) see your doctor and talk to him about medical options. It is nothing to be ashamed of dude. For awhile I was on Anti-Depression pills, Valiums, along with oxycodone that I use recreationally. All of this led to problems with Sheeps Jr. My doctor priscribed me drugs to help, and they did, though thankfully I do not need them anymore now that i am off the anti-d's.

    Best of luck to you, try to make it a wonderful experience for both of you, especially for her. Make it really sweet and comfortable for her. If it goes well and you do your part she will love you for it a lot. It will show her that you deeply care for her and want to do your best to please her and be kind to her.

    Im going to need a smoke and a cold shower after this post. Have fun and I hope everything turns out great. :)
     
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