This is somewhat of a long story, just thought I'd warn you. It all starts when I went to live on the dorms in college. I didn't really know anyone so I just cocooned myself in my room with my weed and my bass. I didn't have anyway of purchasing booze and the only corner store around was hard to take from so I started having alcohol withdrawals within a few days (you know, waking up puking, the shakes, etc.). Eventually, I met a fellow music major with a drum set in his room. I started just smoking weed and playing music, and that's how I met her. I saw her and immediately had to look around on the ground to see as to where I dropped my jaw. I said, "Yo, I'm bout to smoke weed, you wanna join?" And from there we became best friends. She had a boyfriend so I never made a move on her. And even when they broke up I just never had the courage to make a move. Throughout the semester we became really good friends, we could tell each other anything. Then after I decided to leave the school we were still good friends. Then after a friend's band's first show at a party she went home and I didn't think much of it. Out of nowhere, after I had been pining for this girl's emotional affection she texts me to say, "I really like you a lot, and I've been afraid to say it for a long time." This was it, I was happier then I'd been in an incredibly long time. Well, we tried going out but like a douchebag, I was STILL afraid to do anything as I was woefully inexperienced with women. It just ended up being weird and awkward and me being wasted for the majority of the short-lived relationship. She was disappointed in me (rightfully so) and was angry at me because she already went out with a whole slew of dickbags before hand, and she didn't need some boozehound slob to be dragging her down. Well after that, she pretty much loathed my very existence. But after a while of not seeing each other she ended going out with some other douchebag and after a ton of apologizing on my part and begging her to give me another chance to be her friend again. Because back on the dorms she was way more than just some chick I wanted to "do", she really was one of my best friends. After all was said and done she forgave me and we started to hang out again. The dude she was going out with was a complete tool and she spent most of her time with him (like ditching plans with me and another good friend because of the guy getting himself into a whole bunch of bullshit). But then they break up and out of nowhere she is really eager to hang out with me. I don't want to do anything to soon since she did just break up with the guy and shit, but I want her back badly. I have no idea how I should go about doing anything though. I would like to tell her how stupid I was then and that if she would give me another chance I would love to treat her the way she deserves to be treated, but I just don't know how. I'm, "not good with emotions", so to speak. Does anyone have any advice at all? As high school as it sounds, I need help telling the girl of my dreams how I feel.
hey dude, this is my first post i had a situation like this with a girl for 3 years. for 3 years i wanted to be with her but i just couldnt pull out the moves when it got to actually being with her and getting physically close to her. it took me about 2 and a half years to kiss her, and then when i came back from a long trip to australia we finally got over that hurdle, but then id waited so long it was just pointless so dude, my advice to you is this. dont be scared, you know she ilkes you, just go for it and regret shit afterwards. i try not to have any regrets and i do have very very few, but the one i hold onto is not geting close to this girl while i could. i adore her, ive never met anyone like her. shes been with other guys but fuck it man, i love her. and i guess its the same situation for you. so good luck man jono
Advice? She told you she likes you. Dont be afraid, just tell her how you feel and make moves. I made the same mistake once before. I was inexperienced with women back then, I hooked up with this girl. She had a boyfriend, so i guess that kinda held me back from making moves, Idk. But she liked me and i was to much of a bitch to make moves after hooking up, she gave me many chances but I failed. Don't fail like I did. Learn from my mistake and take the advice. Man up and be confident and go for her !
Just pull her to the side one day, or when you two are hanging out 1 on 1, just let your emotions go. Talk from the heart, not your mind. Yes, it's very hard to convert your emotions into words, but if you really like this girl as much as you say you do, it'll come naturally. I know it did for me when I told my ex-girlfriend how I felt. Don't beat around it, I've noticed that a lot of girls don't like bullshit or people who beat around the bush about emotions. Love is one of the greatest feelings in the world, nothing better then feeling your insides warm to the sheer presence of your significant other, you just need to let your heart do the talking.
Don't really over think what you want to say, just say what you feel man. If you beat around the bush, chances are you'll come up with some stupid excuse as to why you shouldn't say what you want to say, because you're scared of being rejected. Even though it probably wont happen. She told you how she feels, let her know you feel the same way. Treat her like you would any other person, and you're set. Communication is key. Good luck man.
that story was too long to read, but it sounds like alcahol is the antagonist here and im not surprised it usually is. contrary to popular belief, the main attraction of this substence is to..... soo stoned..
Words of Wisdom to all the posters above... that being said... Kick the boozeDurrr.. Light up a fat jay everyday for medication...just do it After a few days being sober ask her to sit down and talk with you, sit down, take your left hand grab your balls and squeeze em tight....then tell her the exact situation that your in, everything, from inexpierence to your alcoholism...if she really likes you she will appreciate this more than you know. Then you can continue to live an alcohol free life of smoking buds and the girl you like... ahhh happiness alcohol never ends good my friend good luck
Well, after trial and error, I've noticed something: The inner issue is with your substance abuse. Instead of using something as a tool to enjoy life, you've used it as a veil to hide yourself from it, but that's a discusion for another day. As for the girl, I'd suggest a couple things: 1. Stop apologizing, if you keep bringing up bad times, subconsciously, they'll always be there. Water under the bridge bro! 2. Make a move! She obviously got frustrated because you've yet to make a move. Take her out for a night. Go get some dinner, and MAYBE have a drink or two. If you're truly passionate about someone, ya gotta make it known. She's obviously into you, so I'm assuming that if you leaned if for a kiss, I'd doubt she'd reject ya. Just make sure ya do it at a good time i.e; a walk at night, after dinner etc... Set the mood bro!