Lmk what you think. open to criticizm

Discussion in 'The Artist's Corner' started by apathy951, May 21, 2010.

  1. #1
    \t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t \t\t\t\t wouldnt be surprised
    if you believed all those that lied.
    heed this advice and eat more rice!
    no really, dont get all touchy feeley.
    what was is now his
    and what comfort there may be
    dont.
    let.
    it.
    fool you
    cruel you
    these tired ears have heard
    all
    there
    is to hear about smear
    these tired eyes have seen
    be keen
    dont let
    your gaurd down now kid.
    rid.
    yourself off all your insecurities and live
    life.



    #2
    torn;
    from outside in.
    ripped limb to limb
    forlorn;
    broken, bloody and bruised.
    dirty, muddy and confused
    Honesty, honesty never worked.


    \t\t\t\t\t\t\t \t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t \t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t \t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t
    \t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t \t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t

    #3
    Ive been noticing this for quite some time now
    and it seems this dark cloud grows ever more stark...
    tensions rise
    tempers boil
    pray to the winds for we will fall, just look for the mark.
    its a thousand miles between here and nowhere
    and even more between us and them
    write and write with this ink and pen
    out for display so show and stare.

    theres this elephant in the room and im introducing the beast
    its name is jealousy
    his name is greed
    her name is vain.

    now take your eyes gaze and feast
    the delectable delicacy just must so happen to be us and all this fuss.
     

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