I got back from smoking a bowl and got the urge to write down my thoughts because they have been being overwhealming. So I opened up a word document and started writing. Just wanted to hear you guys' thoughts. Tue 1:11am 4/11/06 Well lately ive been contemplating the meaning of life. I've decided that this world is narrow minded and there is something missing from this picture. And I'm one of few in this world who truly know it in their core. It seems that my place in everything has sifted slightly, and my attachment to life has grown unattached. I feel like I've awoken from a dream. A dream of the reality that's portrayed in our perception of reality, being the true reality. I look at the popular media of the past, the 20's, 30's, 40's, 50's and so on, and I wonder were people that shallow to think that fancy manners and judgment matter? People either look at that stuff and reject it as ideals of a false society, or embrace it as a romance vision, and they fail to see pass the surface and to question what has been put before them. The media today is just a bad as the media then, and you wonder: with the vast technological advances being made out there, are people just as unsophisticated about the meaning of life as 2,000 years ago? I look at everything around me and I wonder if none of this has any true permanent, substantial value then what's the point? What is it in life that we are supposed to hold on to? If nothing has meaning beyond our notion of emotional attachment then why are we here? I can't accept that this nightmare I've been born into is an inexplicable situation for which no one has the map to, but they all think they do. Does it matter? Lately shit like this have just been hitting me, and I don't know whether to embrace it or to run for cover and forget I've had doubts about reality. The last couple days were pretty bad, but today I feel more upbeat although I don't feel spiritually connected to this reality. It's hard to watch shows with social, stereotypical behavior, like sitcoms and such. That's the end lol. Took me about 1/2 hour to write. I don't know if any of it makes sense or I'm just nuts, but yea I'd like to hear your guys' philosophies.