Life Story+ Need Advice

Hey guys i'm new to the forums to bear with me as I write my first post.

I started smoking the incredible herb in 12th grade, before I smoked I was extremely conservative about the subject and thought that stoners were brain dead, the usual nonsense shit they teach you in school. 

Anyways I broke up with my GF (not on good terms mind you) so everything was super stressful. I tried weed once before I broke up with her but I didn't feel any high cause I didn't know how to inhale from a joint, n'or did I know how to use the puffer inhaler (for asthma) pipe. So with the breakup still stressing me out I call on my friend (a stoner duh) to smoke me up for my first time. He agreed excitedly to the request and told me to meet him in town.

So yea long story short I got SUPER HIGH   <-- (maybe not quite like that lol) but I couldn't feel my feet and when I drove it was super slow motion it was hard to describe but it was fun and scary at the same time. Being the nice guy that my friend is he bought me a slice of pizza and we chilled till I dropped him off and went home (what a ride it was, going 60kmph thinking i'm in the indy 500!  )

After that I was in love. I woke up super refreshed, and after doing research I realized how awesome it really was and that all the shit about weed they taught you in school was lies. Did that ever make me pissed. I smoked every second or third day after that with buddies in his shed and had no problems using water bongs playing COD zombies and shit it was fun as hell for a grade 12  

Soon college comes along and wow is it ever a wake up call for me. Never have I been so stressed! I was so unprepared when it came to school work and scheduling it eventually led to me dropping out of my program and trekking it home  

With that as my background maybe you guys can help me with my problem now with weed. Ever since I had a negative pot cookie experience (pacing around my dorm room thinking I'm gonna die type shit) I smoke weed in the pussiest of amounts and sometimes I wont even smoke at all. I want to so bad because I know how fun, calm, neat (yea weed made me organized lol) and better in school. But now the problem is if I smoke alot the thoughts of a negative experience race through my head and kill my mellow   

What should I do guys? I know this is a long post but I needed to get this off my chest. Should I go bongs out blazing head on? Let me know if you guys have similar experiences


 

 

Thanks guys for the advice! Sounds like mindset is everything