What's up blades. So recently my girlfriend of 8 months and I have just been going downhill. I've been on the verge of breaking up with her but she always guilt trips me out of it. I care about her a lot, but I'm almost to the point where I'm done no matter what. Yesterday she promised me she hasn't said a word to a dude she had a thing with since the day we started dating. Of course I believed her. She forgot to log out of twitter on my pc so I went on there to fuck around and change her little caption thing under her name to something cute that she would see. But then I see a message from the guy she promised she hasn't talked to for 8 months. They were just talking like a week ago; about if he was dating...yeah... Don't get me wrong, I don't mind her talking to guys. But the fact she lied to me about that just totally fucking pisses me off after everything I've gone through with her. And the conversation topic didn't help, but it was only like 5 messages long. He basically just said yeah he was dating someone and that was the end of it. So basically I'm going to ask her if she's been dishonest with me about something recently and if she doesn't come clean I'm dumping her even though I still have feelings for her. Sucks man...thoughts/input on what to do?
Dude my girl talks to guys she used to have a things for also. But I know she loves my thing to much to stray. Obviously you have some trust issues. But it seems to me like your over thinking things and they are going downhill because of you. Doesn't seem like your girl did anything wrong....u can't be a control freak and not allow her to talk to certain people. How's ur sex life? Nothing great?
I don't care that she's talking to him man. It's just the fact she lied to me about it that upsets me and makes it kinda suspicious.
She lied to you because you made a big deal out of talking to him, and obviously didn't want her to. So naturally the easy thing to do is say that she hasn't. Relationships are full of small lies...no matter how much it sucks it's the truth. I don't tell my girl a few things because I know it will annoy her...I'm sure she keeps a few things to herself that would annoy me as well. But if you can't trust one another then there's no point in having a relationship. Period. " But then I see a message from the guy she promised she hasn't talked to for 8 months." Be suspicious all you want but it will only hinder the relationship. You being nosy will not prevent her from talking to other guys. If you think she's going to cheat then break up with her...if you know she loves you then you have nothing to worry about. But judging from the fact that you didn't answer my sex question....things must not be going so hot in the bedroom. Maybe get that figured out and she'll stop flirting with other guys.
nah dude she's a wait until marriage person... But I guess I should have added this in the original post. She lies about everything, even if she's just going out with her friends somewhere. I seriously catch her in some kind of lie everyday and I'm sick of it. Hence thread title.
I don't believe in relationships are filled with small lies, but then again I can tell my man everything and we talk it out if it's a problem. Lies are are bad but staying with someone because you feel guilty isn't good either. In the end you know you're not going to end up with this girl so why drag it out? That's the reason you should end it. Her lies are secondary to the real problem.
Forget these folks tellin u to chill. I jus seen somethin like that on my girls shit. U better believe I'm goin to see dude when the sun comes up tomorrow. Ill keep my pride in tact by giving dude a vaca to the ER I feel u bro. I got trust issues as well. But she lied to ur face, jus like my bitch does. Thats a no go in my book
what about the fact that the conversation was about whether or not that dude was dating, and all of a sudden the conversation ended when he said yea? That's the really suspicious shit right there. On top of lying to you and doing shit behind your back, it also seems like she wants to hop on this guy. IF my partner tells me they're not going to do something, and they do i WILL make the biggest fucking deal out of it. No matter how small it really is, your word or lack thereof will make me lose any respect and trust that i had for you. I ALWAYS keep my promises, that i make to my gf. And if she can't do the same, then gtfo.
Lol I mean like smal smalll lies like...she asks what I've been doing all day. Somedays I feel really lazy and just play some video game/go on my computer. But I'll tell her I'm bored doing some homework. I believe she does the same. She'll be watching tv or on the comp and say she's trying to do hw. Hmmm also things like if she's having lady issues she'll lie because she doesn't want me to not be satisfied. I feel like realistically it's hard for a human to not lie at least once through out the day, though if your very introverted and don't talk much I'm sure it's quite easy lol. But all lies aside...drop the bitch. She won't even give you any.
idk about you guys but if i had a girlfriend who was asking if some guy was dating another girl that'd make me a little bit edgy...
Word. Thanks for the responses and insight guys She told me it meant nothing, she was just being friendly and it'd only be a big deal if they talked everyday
I had one of those. Except she wasn't really. She wasn't a virgin, nor was she committed to waiting until marriage. Talk about serious sexual frustration. Girl just wouldn't put out for me. Fack. Personally, I think you're overreacting. Confront her about it and see how she handles it. If she gets all up in your face about it (remember, you were invading her privacy) then consider giving her the boot. Aggressively defensive people usually have something to hide. I get the fact that she lied and why that upsets you, but you've got to at least hear her out.
see but here is the thing. If she lied about that, what else can she be lying about? I was in a relationship with a girl that lied a lot. Small shit, big shit whatever. IF she's lying about something small, why wouldn't she lie about other shit? If she can get away with this, what else can she be doing behind your back? Idk i've always trusted people, and i still do. I just see it a little clearer. Little lies add up and add up, and eventually you can't trust that person anymore. Funny i say this and i always say i don't have trust issues. Maybe i really do lol. Certain things set off red flags for me. And lying, no matter how small and harmless it may be, is a no no. I don't lie, why should i tolerate it? I don't do shit behind her back, why should i tolerate it? so on and so forth.
You obviously have some trust issues. Fact of the matter is that it is LITERALLY impossible to find a relationship where both people have NEVER lied to each other. People lie about small things on a day to day basis...now, that doesn't mean that I cheat on my girlfriend because I tell her I'm doing homework when I'm not. I'd just rather not deal with her giving me shit for playing video games all day.... So...you've never lied to your parents that you brushed your teeth when you hadn't? You've never said you're doing one thing when you're actually doing something else? I find that really hard to believe. I used to be like you...because my dad brought me up with a zero tolerance for lying. That was his biggest thing. And it's true...but small lies do not always add up to big lies. That's just silly. My dad lies to my mom all the time and vice versa...they are happy as can be...
For me its not about lying to me, its what the lie was about. My last gf told me she wasnt talking to people I hated and hated me, and tried to get her to leave me for them. Of course she was talking to them, and of course she cheated on me. Damn near 3 years just down the drain. Fuckin sucks, but when I found out the rumors were true, I told that bitch to kick rocks and lose my number.
the convo with the guy isnt really that big of a deal. if it was enough for you to make a "last straw" thread saying that you want to break up with her then it sounds like you are frustrated with the relationship and ready to leave for a number of reasons. just end it. do you really want to drag it out longer and waste more time? or do you actually think a dramatic turn around is possible to where you are happy in the relationship?