I've always thought I was the guy who meant the things he said. The guy who actually cared for the women he said he did. I've come to realize that the things I say and the things I do are just to get what I want and whatever else happens, happens. I always looked down on guys like this, and now I realized that's me. I tried to change, but every time I think I'm changing I discover I'm only doing the same thing again. I always used to think that the things I said and the things I did were for them, but they weren't. In the end it was really all about myself and I'm disgusted. I can't smoke weed for who knows how long, I don't know what I'm going to do to change the way I treat women but it needs to happen. There really isn't a reason for this post but I'm just trying to get some things out or whatever.
Good for you. If you really want to change you'll keep trying until you become someone your more satisfied being. Worked for me
Best advice I can give is try to remain conscious of your actions. If you consider how and what your doing you can help insure your not just functioning off of habit Takes practice though...
Cheer up man, your not an asshole. Maybe just a dickhead but not an asshole. And a product of a "globelly" competitive environment. And yeah, 1st step to a change is self awareness. But you can't destroy and reconstruct, as humans we don't have that luxury, you just gotta be the change ya dig.
Don't worry dude. I found out over Valentine's Day weekend that I'm immature. I'm trying to change but it's difficult. And now my girlfriend's cousin has a really nasty negative opinion of me and I'm worried she might say things to my gf like, "So, still dating that asshole?" Really, it was a stupid thing, but it doesn't deserve this. Cheer up. The only thing you can do is grow from your experiences. No way you can learn to mature or change just by sitting in your room moping about it. You gotta get out there and grab life by the horns and skull fuck it til it's brain squeezes out its ears.
You guys are right, I shouldn't just sit around feeling like shit. It is easier said than done though. I did just break off a 13 month relationship too so that doesn't help.
I thought I changed the way I treated women. I've been good forever. But I'm fucking up worse than ever now. Tough decision to make, don't even wanna get into it.
It is easier said than done. I told my gf I could mature and that I'm sorry. It's pretty difficult. I'm used to my way of living (20 years) and now I have to change it. It's time to grow up.
just my opinion...the fact that you wrote that and posted it, and the thought you put into it, you're not an asshole. Not everyone is a saint...I'm a girl that say's and does things to get what I want, sometimes intentionally, other times it takes a hard look to see what my underlying motives really were. Dont fret too much though, just the other day at work, a co-worker and i were cruising for lunch, when she went into great detail on how she gets by in life from everyone to her parents, boyfriends, employers and all, by playing victim and she does this purposely. She explained several recent situations were she turned her faults, flaws mistakes and lies into the other persons fault and soon they're apologizing, giving in and making it up to her. I guess were all assholes.
Realizing that you are an asshole is the first step towards maturing and changing. I'm not saying you're immature, but most guys under 30 are more immature than mature.
Yeah, I guess I just really need to think hard about what it is I'm doing before I do it. Especially considering it concerns other peoples lives. Thanks guys and gals.
Hey only a non-asshole would seriously call himself an asshole, and I mean seriously. Keep your head up and just do the right thing, which the best you can do in any situation.
That's not true... I'm a asshole... You wouldn't believe some of the things I've done to women and there emotions. I can be an amassing guy, or I can be Satan. Funny thing is every one things I'm such nice guy, but it's really all a lie. I just don't care at all and cover it up very well. So there for I am an asshole... But to the op, good for you. Good luck changing to be who you want. I'm to lazy to be who I want, witch is probably for the better...
That's dualistic. You don't really want to be "who I want", you want to be "to lazy to be who I want". My comment stands.
How does you're comment stand when it was no asshole is a self professed asshole, and nothing to do with my lack of motivation to try and change my personality into something similar to Dr. Thompson during his two trips to Vegas (but not always drug/alcohol induced)? In the sense of playing with females emotions/heads and/or using them, I am most certainly an asshole. Granted there are two exception's in my romantic history. Not something I am proud of, but it doesn't really bother me ether. Fore some reason I get grate satisfaction with pulling those emotional strings and watching the reactions and things they do as a result. Unless you don't consider it asshole-ish to encourage emotional attachment of some one you really don't like at all just for entertainment on tell you get bored, some one better is found, or one of many other reasons arise.... My only saving grace in that matter is that I don't look an asshole while doing it, and there were two girls I actually liked and had a real relation ship with. So does acting/looking like a nice guy, despite the messed up motives, make me not an asshole? Other wise, I am self professed asshole and your comment does not stand. Though there really aren't that many guys that will openly admit to being an asshole when they are in fact often one. But ether way I'm done jacking the OP's thread. If you want discuss my oxymoronic self, feel free to pm me your comment's.
This song came to mind. Denis Leary - I'm An Asshole Folks, Id like to sing a song about the American Dream About me, about you About the way our American hearts beat way down in the bottom of our chests About that special feeling we get in the cockles of our hearts Maybe below the cockles, Maybe in the sub cockle area, Maybe in the liver, maybe in the kidneys, Maybe even in the colon, we dont know Im just a regular Joe, with a regular job Im your average white, suburbanized slob I like football and porno and books about war I got an average house, with a nice hardwood floor My wife and my job, my kids and my car My feet on my table, and a Cuban cigar But sometimes that just aint enough to keep a man like me interested (oh no, no way, uh uh) No I gotta go out and have fun at someone elses expense (woah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah) I drive really slow in the ultra fast lane While people behind me are going insane Im an asshole (hes an asshole,what an asshole) Im an asshole (hes an asshole, such an asshole) I use public toilets and I piss on the seat I walk around in the summer time saying "how about this heat?" Im an asshole (hes an asshole,what an asshole) Im an asshole (hes the worlds biggest asshole) Sometimes I park in handicapped spaces While handicapped people make handicapped faces Im an asshole (hes an asshole,what an asshole) Im an asshole (hes a real fucking asshole) Maybe I shouldnt be singing this song Ranting and raving and carrying on Maybe theyre right when they tell me Im wrong... Nah Im an asshole (hes an asshole,what an asshole) Im an asshole (hes the worlds biggest asshole) You know what Im gonna do Im gonna get myself a 1967 Cadillac Eldorado convertible Hot pink, with whale skin hubcaps And all leather cow interior And big brown baby seal eyes for head lights (yeah) And Im gonna drive in that baby at 115 miles per hour Gettin' 1 mile per gallon, Sucking down Quarter Pounder cheeseburgers from McDonalds In the old fashioned non-biodegradable styrofoam containers And when Im done sucking down those greeseball burgers Im gonna wipe my mouth with the American flag And then Im gonna toss the styrofoam containers right out the side And there aint a goddamn thing anybody can do about it You know why, because weve got the bombs, thats why 2 words, nuclear fucking weapons, OK? Russia, Germany, Romania, they can have all the democracy they want They can have a big democracy cakewalk Right through the middle of Tiananmen Square and it wont make a lick of difference Because weve got the bombs, OK? John Wayne's not dead, hes frozen, and as soon as we find a cure for cancer Were gonna thaw out the duke and hes gonna be pretty pissed off You know why, Have you ever taken a cold shower, well multiply that by 15 million times Thats how pissed off the dukes gonna be! I'm gonna get the Duke, and John Cassavetes, and Lee Marvin, and Sam Peckinpah, and a case of whiskey, and drive down to Texas and say..... (Hey! You know, you really are an asshole!) Why don't you just shut up and sing the song, pal? Im an asshole (hes an asshole.what an asshole) Im an asshole (hes the worlds biggest asshole) A-S-S-H-O-L-E Everybody A-S-S-H-O-L-E Im an asshole and Im proud of it