Tell me if this is any good. I didn't want to post this in the poetry thread because it looks more like an outlet of expression than a forum for feedback. Nothing The concept of nothingness inevitably implies something There cannot be nothing without something There cannot be death without life There cannot be failure without success There cannot be loneliness without Love. Nothing is relative. What is nothing but the contrast of something? How can I fear death if I do not experience life? How can I wallow in failure if I do not envy success? How can I not yearn for the warmth of you on my back? How can I not shiver at your ghostly breath chilling my soul? How do I help my legs from quivering when I imagine you in between? How do I ignore these impulses when I see their vibrant fruit everywhere? I water and sow and tend to the land Many seeds planted \tNothing. here? Nothing. but somewhere Something.
Went a bit downhill at the end there. Wasnt exactly a profound ending. Better than i could probably do nonetheless.
I like the first half, I could do without the rest. I wouldn't say it's great but it's certainly not terrible either.
You ask me a lot of questions that I don't know the answer to. But it's good, not the best, but good.
I definitely was not ready for it. You transitioned awfully quick from a poem of existence and duality, to... That. Care to explain?
Too many abstractions, not enough concrete images and details. It doesn't really evoke any emotion from me at all.
Cool! How it went for me was the first stanzas were general enough that it applied to me and was though provoking then it got personal and it was harder to relate i dont know if you already knew that or if it even matters, but just my 2 cents
I agree with Borgarden, The beginning and middle were very rich and clear, but the end was a bit thin and confusing.