Hello everybody. I came to Grasscity because this cyber-spot is filled with so much random and useful information pertinent to my situation. I'm about to obtain my bachelor's degree (in 10 days), I take my last final tomorrow, I have a job lined up with a collections agency (I'm desperate, please don't judge, the local job economy where I live is hopeless at best), and I smoked the last of my bud yesterday, and I'm freaking out. I've been smoking daily for almost 5 years now, and I have passed a urinalysis at Quest Diagnostics 4 years ago, detoxed for 2 weeks using Niacin, water, cranberry juice, and exercise. I'm bugging out because I haven't been able to be clean from weed for more than a few days unless I was on vacation with family and had no access. I also have a 3 oz bottle of Synthetic Labs Quick Fix sitting next to my bed in case of an emergency, and it's 11 months old. I'm a very productive person, and I've gotten good grades in school, done well at all my temporary staffing assignments, in the domains of banking/finance, industrial/manufacturing, and I can read and absorb knowledge while I'm stoned. I've typed research papers using scholarly sources while stoned, developed substantial and vital information about the financial industry (studied for the FINRA Series 7 exam daily for 4 months before I decided finance wasn't for me), and now I'm studying to become an EMT-B (paramedic and fireman someday) because my degree in sociology seems absolutely worthless. I feel like I adjusted too well to daily life under the influence of cannabis and I want to stop for this test coming in 19 days, I know I can do it, I stocked up on cranberry juice and Traditional Medicinals Everyday Detox tea, but I want to cave so damn badly and toke up right now, which I assume is normal after abrupt termination of the habit I enjoyed multiple times daily for five years now. I know for fire and EMT I must abstain, but that won't be an issue for me because that is my greater cause. The collections job seems like something I could smoke thru and use my Quick Fix piss if it hasn't expired; the batch was made last year so it should be fine I think, and also I found that I'd save somewhere around $3k yearly if I didn't buy bud every week, and although these reasons all seem so compelling, I can't bring myself to stop, or sitting at home bored and broke just makes me want to fire up and say "fuck it" and alleviate my boredom until I get my EMT certification in 3 months. Can somebody help me here? I'm really just trying to solicit many responses and opinions from all you wise stoners from all over the forums, all over the country, and all over the world. I know this entire post seems like a waste of text because the answers are so simple, but I guess I just need support of some sort. Although we're not like the LGBT community in terms of how fiercely we're discriminated against, we as stoners need to stick together and help one another out, and if somebody can offer me some insight to my situation I'd be deeply grateful. If you think I'm an idiot or a confused kid, you're not all that far off. The uncertainties of life get my head spinning, like studying FINRA and SEC regulations, and weed is my avenue of massaging my brain, and I just don't know what else to do because I'm sitting here bored as hell, my roommate is firing up a bowl of some fire ass bud right next to me as we speak, and any advice at all would be appreciated. Thank you very much for taking the time to read this long post and good luck to you in all of your endeavors.
I won't lie, I read about 75% of your post before I stopped. You seem to be addicted. I really don't care what you say, but from the desperation of your post, it says everything I need to know. What do you really want? Do you want to get high and possibly lose this job? Or do you want to man the fuck up and quit for 19 days and get this job? I hate to be a dick man, but man the fuck up. You are not powerless. You are not weak. You are not helpless. So get over yourself. You have it so good that you don't even realize it. You are not starving, you do not live in a war torn country, you are not oppressed every day by a corrupt government. So quit for fucking 19 days and pass this fucking test. Are you really that weak and undisciplined that you can't stop smoking for 19 days? Fuck man. You are obviously over 20 years old, get a hold of yourself. Get your fucking priorities straight and stop acting like a fucking fiend. You can either get high right now and loose your job, or wait 19 days, get this job and then blaze afterwords. It's up to you man. Hate on me if you want but I don't care, I tell it like it is.
thanks X-Blunt I know that's what I needed. I know how awesome I have it, it's just a tough thing to adjust to for now. I'm just scared is all. I needed to hear it from a fellow stoner and not an authority figure.
Yeah man I hated to rip on you, but people have done that to me in the past and it motivated me. I hope there are no hard feelings, you sound like an intelligent person and I would love to hear what happens in 19 days. I don't just post "shit" in threads and leave it alone, I like to know what actually happens to the OP. Feel free to either PM me or post in this thread, I am sub'd. I want to know what ends up happening. I think you just needed a no-bullshit realistic conversation to open your eyes. I am no expert but I have struggled with addiction in the past, and let me tell you, it is not easy. I know what you are going through. I know what it is like to FIENDDD for MJ. I understand what you are going through and when I quit bud things only got BETTER. I got an awesome job (Tier 1 Help Desk) and it has been nothing but golden since. I had so many problems when I smoked bud, I was in constant denial. You have to be honest with yourself. If you are addicted you will know it, admit it to yourself, and instead of getting angry/mad/depressed/whatever, do something about it. Be pro active about getting off it.
well, after reading your resume, which i can't understand why you shared with us. i can give you my opinion, but i did a lot of skimming, because the majority of your post, is just of you giving yourself a b.j. lol!!! seriously, you need to decide what is your priority in life. i read about a fairly young person, who sounds like a spoiled kid who gets what he wants, but just wants it all, and can't have it, and can't figure out why. you need to just grow up. no offense meant, but why sugar coat it? seems like you've been getting that a lot. peace
Yeah man blunt has a point... I can tell you now you'll be good on the test if you don't smoke about a week before. But seriously man, self control.
Hey fellas it's been nearly 7-8 months since my last post, and things are going pretty well for me; I didn't take that collections job (continued to be a stoner!!!), but I managed to land a gig for the summer as a security guard as I took my EMT-Basic course, and passed it in mid-August of this year. I landed another gig at a private ambulance company and have been there since (passed the test with my own clean urine), and have cut back significantly on my weed use. However, now I'm faced with an interesting new dilemma that is purely my own fault. I was involved in a low-speed collision in a hospital parking lot (I clipped a loading ramp on a wheel chair van since it was dark and I couldn't see the ramp), and I took a drug test last night that I'm nervous about. (The patients, both in the back of my ambulance and in the back of the wheel chair van were unharmed, vitals were checked on them, found to be stable, and they politely declined to be transported to the ER, which was about 500 feet from where the incident took place) As you can imagine I'm not clean, but I've been carrying a bladder pouch mixed with Synthetix 5.0 urine as well as QuickFix 5.7.1, and it registered as having normal chemical properties on a test strip 3 months ago, and last night after I took the test, and it was only 92 degrees. This you may find interesting, I was to be left under the eyes of a supervisor for the duration of the time between the collision and the urinalysis, but the supervisor left to get fast food and left me with another supervisor who allowed me to go to the bathroom, only "semi-supervised" if you will; he was in the bathroom by the sinks while I was in the stall dropping a deuce and I managed to strap the bladder to my waist without arousing any suspicion. Then the original supervisor came back to take me to the lab, but regardless, the bladder didn't heat up in time (only up to 88 degrees). The collector said "this is weird, the urine is cold to the touch and barely registers on the cup" and I knew immediately what she was thinking. She asked the supervisor if he was with me the whole time and he said he was, probably just to protect his own tail and not lose his job, and she shrugged her shoulders, said "hmm" and just poured it in the vials, capped the samples and had me sign the form. I think I'm okay but I won't know until Friday. I figure that the only way I'd be caught would be right then and there when she collected the low-temperature sample. The strip read normal at the temperature she collected it at after I went home so I should probably be fine right? I will never smoke weed as long as I work in EMS and will take this as my final blessing but I just wanted some feedback to see if anyone else had ever been in a spot like this before. Feel free to judge me if you want to; I never smoked before a shift, just on weekends, and in some cases to help me sleep after I saw something particularly disturbing but I'd never do that prior to patient care. I was just nervous as anyone would be in this type of situation. Thank you all so much for all your responses in the past, and I wish all of you a merry Christmas, and all the best as far as luck goes with all endeavors you may be engaged in.