Hello GC. This thread is gonna be kind of sad but I'd appreciate it if you read it. I've been around here for a long time but I never really post much, but I kind of needed to get a few things off my chest. Internet forums really help me relieve stress when I'm not getting hammered and spending all my money for no reason. So, I'm in the Army, and I pretty much hate everything about it. I deal with power hungry fuckheads on a daily basis that have absolutely no life so they love to fuck with people for no reason. Shitty mind games, doing retarded shit, getting smoked until you throw up...you know, living the dream, right? Maybe other jobs in the Army are awesome, because I've heard all about. But I thought what the hell! I'll join the Infantry. Fucking good choice. On top of all this, I'm deploying to Afghanistan in November for fucking 9 months. And that is freaking me out a bit...I could go on and on about how Army life sucks the will to live right out of me, but I hope you get the picture. I remember before I joined the Army, I worked in a coffee shop and took a few classes at a community college. I didn't really have a direction in life but I was the happiest I've ever been in my life. Which doesn't make sense when you compare that life to mine now, because I should be having the time of my life right now. I make decent money, and I have no bills (I'm single so I live in the barracks) Nashville is a short drive away which is an awesome city to party in. But I just don't know. I've lost that "spark"...I can remember smoking a joint outside with a couple friends and just looking up in the sky on a summer day without a care in the world and loving every minute of it. Now it's like I drone on day to day and it all rolls together. One good thing is I have an amazing girlfriend but she lives in Atlanta and it kills me not to be with her. In any other situation, this would be an easy fix, just go look for another job and then quit the one you hate. But I'm forced to be here by contract. My girl hates being away from me, but I see her as often as I can when we get long weekends and such but even when I go back home, even my friends say I'm different and I literally have nothing to talk to them about. We go out and I'll just kind of chill. It's kind of sad and I don't really know what to do. I just want to be happy again you know? I've got everything going for me but then again it's a shitty life so. fuck.
First let me start by saying I'm terribly sorry for everything being put upon you. Second, I wish you the best of luck in November, and hopefully somebody can put a stop to this fucking war and all this nonsense so that America can recuperate judging by the fact we are billions of dollars in debt. I wish I could tell you something hopeful, but I am at a loss of words at just how stunningly horrible this is. What the army and US Forces do to people is plain cruelty, in my opinion, and I believe they could easily be tried as war criminals. All I can really say to you is: stay positive, don't give up, and focus on what makes you happy. Happiness is not only the most important aspect to life, but it can be argued that is the sole purpose of life. I'm not sure if you are Religious or what, but hold on to whatever faith you have left and ride it through the storm. Know that no matter what happens, even if you are altered completely and change as an individual, you still have a family that loves you and a girlfriend who cares about you. I simply can not imagine the horrors you are faced with; to be condemned to shipment for war and just sit around and THINK about it sounds like mental torture, and it is a wonder you aren't going bat-shit crazy. Know that no matter what happens, whether you do go insane, or you are killed in battle, or you come home completely unscathed and bored, you have lived a life up until this point. You have loved, and you have been loved, you have felt emotions only perceivable by you, and you had the chance to enjoy life. This is something many are not even granted. I wish you the best of luck with your life, girlfriend, deployment, mental stability, everything. You are a hero to me, no matter what kind of bullshit our country is doing. I'm proud to know you are fighting for us, especially because you are aware of all the corruption being forced upon you. Peace to you, GC loves you (Fuck anybody who says otherwise)
So how long are you in the Army for my good man? Sounds like some similar feelings I am experiencing right now. But in my situation, I am not in the Army. I am home, about to start a job at a very serious company. Who knows if it's because you're in the army, or because other reasons. Probably a lot of it has to do with your girl being far away, and also going to Afghanistan. I, personally would be a little freaked out in your situation as well. But how much did you think about this before joining. Also, why did you join and leave all behind, when you were very happy? I feel for you, though, my man. I think honestly, another reason you may feel stressed out is because you are growing up. That is my problem now as well. I used to chill with friends, have a nice minimum wage job, and smoke all night and day. I was super happy as well, but it's because I had such meaningless responsibilities. Therefore, I had no major stresses in my life. I am about to start a job, pay is around 18 an hour, get drug tested, have to be there on time EVERY DAY, can't call off unless I am truly sick, bring in a doctors not, etc. I really am not looking forward to this job. Everyone around me is congratulating me, because I too just worked jobs that didn't pay me much. Didn't have a large source of income, therefore no chance of me moving on in my life responsibility wise, and I also didn't think about moving out, getting another car( my head gasket blew) and now these thoughts are all weighing on my mind.... Honestly, I think it's all growing up. The world truly is a scary place, but we all have to face the facts one day. Would you be wanting to work in a coffee shop all of your life, and not make that much money and be able to toke everyday you want with no responsibilities, or would you like your own house, your own family, having responsibilities and purpose in life? In no way am I getting down on you, I am feeling somewhat similar, minus the military aspect, and I think it has a lot to do with growing up. And I find myself venting back, in a way to understand these feelings we have. I am 21, and I know that I need to move on. Can't live in my moms house forever, and smoke all the time. In a perfect world, I could. But I want these responsibilities. And I want to feel humble after achieving my goals. Best of luck OP, in Afghanistan, and wherever else you choose to go. And remember, is it 25 years and then you can retire with 50% of your pay? And the longer you stay, the more percentage of pay you get.. An older head told me the other day 30 years seems very long to people our age, but once you get there, if you didn't do anything worthwhile, and you're still in the same boat, life almost never had a point. and those 30 years go fast. Best of luck to you, and everyone else who is having these feelings.
I'm in for another 4 years and I did think about deployment and such before I joined, I just wanted to do something different you know? Have an experience that not many people get to do or are willing to do for that matter. It's really because I wanted to have thrill and as crazy as it sounds, I want to go to war. Oh and I'm only one year older than you but I don't really think all this is coming from "growing up" I've had to do that a lot earlier than most people. Maybe it's just a phase.
Could be. Could be slightly growing up as well because you knwo You've signed up for something that you can't get out of now, and the thought scares you. Just try and stay positive brother, shit always seems worse than it is. I just broke up with my girlfriend, am insanely depressed, starting a new job Im nervous about, thinking about moving out, and how costly it will be. It's all part of life. But I believe in you. And think about once you're out (if you decide to leave after 4 years) you will have such great chances of getting good jobs. Practically everyone will hire you, and you'll be really set in a lot of ways. Plus, maybe the army will have great job offers for you that you won't need to worry about going to war-stricken places. But if you like war, then maybe you will keep doing that and fucking some shit up. Irregardless, I think you will do just fine. My friend just joined the marines, currently in Okinawa, Japan. He must feel the same. He used to smoke all the time, and when he came home last he was talking about how much he regretted this decision, he misses smoking and all that. But I know he will do fine, as will you my friend.
Best of luck. We will be waiting here, on the other side, completely oblivious to the horrors you undergo. It will be strange, coming back, seeing everybody living so normally, while they are completely unaware of the chaos you have been experiencing. I can totally see how this will be traumatizing, but I know I will never truly feel it or experience it. If nothing else, you will be regarded as a hero among many and maybe have a chance to have a political voice. If you are incredibly disturbed by the military and the current wars, you could even write a novel on it. Maybe you could make a difference. Just know you are not forgotten back here. You're a brave-ass mother-fucker, peace be to you.
dishonorable discharge bro...could save your life in more ways than one...people dont come back the same man...its not worth it if youre unhappy now four more years is just gonna make it worse....go be by your girl and get a crappy job to make yourself happy....i can only imagine what army is like havin assholes tell you what to do all the time and im sure alot of those pricks have huge egos... make yourself happy thats what matters. good luck bro
How could you hold your head up after receiving a dishonorable discharge? Talk about a shitty record that's gonna fuck you for the rest of your life, and NOBODY will hire you!
its better than being dead...or worse....this guy isnt into it why should he just go through the motions for four years of his life for something that means nothing to him...just seems silly to me...maybe you can try for a transfer to a different unit or job or whatever