I mean I know it's going to sound trippy, you can't just remove the emotions you like and remove the ones you dislike. I'm just wondering, how does one not be angered? Shit, this is really tough to explain but i'll try my best. Let's say my issue is that when people touch my fucking shit and don't remember where the fuck they put it because they are ignorant assholes, like shit, I can't leave my shit for 2 seconds without some dickhead touching it and then moving to a spot where said dickhead can't remember, it ignites the fuse that leads to the detonation of anger. Now, I have come to the conclusion that yelling, screaming, breaking the vase that you just bought at ikea, does not solve problems [unfortunately] and does not get you your shit back from the depths of dick. However, what it does is just makes my heart pump faster, and break things I inevitably regret. Anger is a useless emotion that only leads to further destruction [at least in my case] and I just want to know if there is anyway to reduce anger to the point where angry is just being angry, rather than turning into the hulk and smashing shit. I guess what I'm trying to figure out is, how do you become more calmer in situations that in a regular state would make you have this real life nigga moment and beat the shit out of every fucking nigga in the fucking room for being an asshole and touching my shit WHEN I CLEARLY SAY NOT TO TOUCH MY FUCKING SHIT EVERY FUCKING DAY and yet these niggas have like earplugs or someshit and they keep fucking my day up simply by touching my goddamn shit and forgetting where the fuck they put it, nigga damn.
Anger is a natural human reaction to stress. Once one learns to control stress, anger is no more. Of course, nobody is immune to anger all the time. We all have things we can about so much that the stress affecting those things will result in anger, no matter how zen a person is.
Of course, yeah, I didn't expect to exactly remove anger completely, but how does one, maybe lessen the symptoms of being angry. I mean if someone is going to break my car windows, I'm going to obviously be furious. But me being furious isn't going to solve anything, so why be furious, you know? It's not going to automatically fix windows, my windows aren't going to be "hey look, he's angry, we should now fix ourselves." What can help me control my anger to point where I just feel angry rather than expressing that I'm angry? I mean, I'm no little kid who throws temper tantrums or bitchfits, it's just that sometimes, I just have this URGE [maybe it's instinctive, shit, I dunno] to cause damage and I usually let my emotions get the best of me.
I understand, I have a similar problem. I've studied anger for years, read many books, spoke to professional colleagues who are experts on human psychology, etc.. but it is something you just have to work on daily. I truly believe it is impossible to master anger, stress, and impulsive reactions completely. They can, however, be controlled. For me, this comes by living life slowly and thoughtfully, and smoking lots of cannabis. I'm sure you've heard that old, wise advice of counting to ten before responding or acting when stressed or angered. It really works. Try very hard to take things slowly, recognize when you are riled up (you can often tell by the reactions of others to you even if you don't recognize when you are slightly angered or stressed), and think a situation through slowly and carefully before reacting. Over time you will get used to doing this and you will feel you have more control over your stress and anger. Just realizing you have issues with it and that anger is a result of stress is a good starting point.
strangely enough, I haven't. but those are some words of wisdom, i think you are on point when it comes to taking things slow. it allows you to think better and straighter, i'll do that.
Anger can be overcome through non-resistance. Through fully accepting the present moment as it is here and now. When you are fully present, anger cannot survive long. When you get angry observe your anger. Watch what makes you angry and then watch your anger, but try not to react to it. But feel it ..... Try meditation when you are angry , focus on your breathing without trying to fight the anger. Accept your anger and observe it. Feel it. And through acceptance and observance you may find the anger subsides.
"Anger" in science is not such a useless emotion: http://www.cep.ucsb.edu/topics/anger.htm But deeper still look at your post, it isn't attempting to communicate its filled with aggression and frustration. Anger is your default position and as such your lens through which you see the world is cloudy brother. People frequently forget that they usually find what they're looking for, whether its good or ill. If you're looking for [SIZE=12.222222328186035px]suspicion[/SIZE] and blame you'll find a ready culprit but conversely if you look for meaning and understanding you'll seldom miss it. I guess what I'm saying is that sometimes you don't ask for what's easy to find, you ask for what you refuse to see. How much time do human beings waste just missing each other?
This. In accepting things as they are, there is no longer anything 'wrong' with the present moment. It is as it is. It cannot be something other than it is. It may not be what you would have made it into, but it is as it is nevertheless. Once you accept the present this way, then you can look at why you felt a need to resist it. What belief were you under that caused you to react the way you did? Someone touched your shit, used it their way, didn't put it back as you would have, etc. All good reasons to get stressed. But why can't they use your stuff? While you cannot change what has been, you can change what can be in the future. Take away their right to touch it. Make it clear that they are no longer allowed. Or accept that if they do, what then happens is not worth getting stressed out over. It could be you have quite an attachment to the idea about what others should do around you. Either make it so they don't use your things, or chill out and accept that they will. Whatever you decide works for you, by making it your choice, gives you back the control you feel gets lost, and avoids the need to stress about it. Just decide and practice it.
So, you're in a moment, all stressed out and angry, letting rip about why they've touched your stuff yet again, when suddenly, you remember this advice, whip out your trouser snake and start pumping vigorously? Might actually work, as the laughter from those witnessing it will sure change things!
Anger is a natural human emotion, and it is necessary when it is expressed in a healthy manner. Yes, all emotions are important; including the ones that have been labeled "negative emotions," anger, sadness, fear, confusion, etc. Where the line is drawn is when one is able to control and express these emotions in a healthy manner. One should not try to REMOVE an emotion from your life; it is impossible and unhealthy and will only serve to frustrate you further; but rather learning how to control, express, and learn from your emotional states is where the your enlightenment occurs. Every human experiences these emotions, but when they are out of balance, then one can see the negative effects (i.e. turning into the hulk). I would suggest simple meditation every morning and definitely start balancing your Chakras
And think less. In these stressful situations, don't over analyze. Clear your mind and listen to your conscious.
You just need to control yourself man. Anger is a very common and normal thing, but your problem is lack of control. You probably get furious over the smallest things that matter very little to other people except yourself. Even reading this message probably flicked a little switch somewhere. Control, control, control... practice deep breathing, practice catching yourself in the moment- stop whatever you're doing and think "What am I doing?". Don't waste your life on anger, it gets you nowhere.
I'm actually currently attempting to decalcify my pineal, but all this poison is too readily available. Kinda what i'm trying to say you know, I don't necessarily regard anger as a useless, worthless, out-of-place emotion. I mean that my anger, this anger that is does not accomplish anything for me, needs to go.
I found out the hard way man you gotta unleash your anger into something outdoors , smoking a cigg , go skateboarding , run like a fucking sprinter 2miles , punch the bag in the boxing gym (or regular gym if it has boxing place inside) like crazy , you gotta let the steam out or summin , and keep your shit close man gotta learn the hard way , I dont have your problem , its more like a certain ''person'' in the house pissing me the fuck off complaining about shit and causing arguments about shit I would of never thought about that.
You will begin to let your anger leave you when you attempt to remedy the direct causes of your stresses, and learn to control it so it doesn't control you.
Eh, I just put my self in their shoes for a moment. I recognize that, if I had their genetics, and experienced exactly their same life, then I would be exactly them and do exactly as they did. You could call this an appeal to understanding/fairness I imagine -- in any case, it helps me control my emotions. In intsances where you can recognize how to correct issues that are bothersome such that in the future you can reduce the chances of them happening, then I would attempt to do so in a constructive manner. If you can't, then just let things go. For example I lost a $150 pair of earphones while on vacation. I was bothered for about 2 minutes but then realized there's no point to be any more bothered than that. I just make sure now that I'm more careful with things.
I like the last part of that especially. While the idea of putting yourself in their shoes is a good one, you understand you are only ever imagining your idea of them? It does work though, and is a good technique, and much depends on your ability to imagine them in a way that is effective. Besides, in choosing to see things from 'their' perspective, it reveals the state of your mind as being that which chooses to do so. That is always going to bring you balance, whatever technique you feel works for you.