Because you knew you would never make them happy. You would rather see them truly happy with some one else, knowing that would be the best thing you could ever do for the person you love. I did and its fucking killing me. Ive gotten drunk. Gotten high. Ive tried to go back to my old ways of having women a phone call away. The sex is empty and their voices are like white noise. I have no attention span, my mind wanders from this dark reality into the vibrant memories of her at every opportunity. Its been months and I still feel hollow and cold inside. The only time I smile is when Im inches from death or the room is spinning. Maybe I should smoke more and stfu hahaha.
Woah =( if you love her so much why do you think she should be with someone else? I don't even know you but I can tell you really love her.
One thing I've maintained during my dating 'career' is that a small amount of happiness actually exists when you allow a former lover to move onto someone who is better for them. It's tragic for you, a lot of times, but there still is that little sliver of joy knowing they're moving onto something more right. It's also somewhat liberating to just keep that in mind when a relationship forms. It may not work out, but if it doesn't it is certainly for the better.
I feel you man. This happened with my high school sweetheart. I felt good about it at first, then gave up. I had crushed myself. I tried to get her back, but she had figured out it was for the best lol. But we talked and she was so genuine about it, and time passed. She's an old love now, a great lesson. Stick to my guns, and be more honest.. because I had grown some secrets by then. And how to appreciate and nurture the type of love I prefer to have in my life. You'll be okay, my friend. I promise.
I did, but she was a crazy bitch and made me worse off and vice versa. Became like a fuckin disease to be together, trust was gone, more questions than answers. Was fucking our lives up. I knew it was split or die, so I moved one night, came back a few years later and she was still attached. Got married to someone else n she hit up other old gfs, found me n hit me up sayn she missed the d. Wife was in the other room and I was like, this shit needs to stop. Found out a couple years ago she married some 50 year old dude but she had serious daddy issues. Was glad she found happiness out of my orbit. Thought about her for years but glad it went the way it did. Life goes on.
I didnt make her happy. I tried for almost 5 years. The only thing I did in that time was alienate my self from friends and family. I jumped through every fucking hoop. I almost lost who I was entirely for her and it still wasnt good enough. Thats when I realised I wasnt the one for her. The worse part was, when I broke up with her she made me pack her things 3 times (she kept unpacking them) begging and pleading to talk. We had been through so many "break up, talk, get back together" fights that she didnt think it was real, she just left to her parents house. Her parents didnt even believe it was happening until I showed up with the first car load of her belongings, then the second, then the third. I told her not to talk to me anymore and to leave me alone. She didnt. I would have over 100 missed calls from her every day so finally one day I answered while driving. She made me tell her that I hated her, never her loved her, and that everything I ever said or did was a lie. That I wish she would just fall off the face of the planet. I hung up immediatley after wards, pulled over, and broke down.
So basically it was impossible to make her happy but she didn't want you to go? You know, this might have been the best thing you could have done for YOURSELF. you'll find someone that doesn't make you jump through hoops to make her happy. Less stress.
So she was an abusive mind game player narcissist who got off tormenting you n playing mind games? Thank god you got away. Same as my story tbh. You deserve better.
I did. I loved her with all if my being. But she kept cheating on me over and over again. I deserved better so I ended it. Now I have a girlfriend who treats me very well that I've been with for almost a year. <3 Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum
Not quite the same situation, but yes, I have. Girl I dated about a year and a half ago and the last serious relationship I was in. I was madly in love with her and she was in love with me, too. I moved a few hours away, and slowly the long distance and time of life business and stress just caught up with us and we realized there was no way we could do the relationship and stay happy with it. Of course, we realized that in a very rough, painful way. I started drinking heavily. I'm very wary of developing any sort of emotions for girls, still. I'm better then I was a year ago, but that situation messed me up.
Yes, she developed a serious drug problem because my buddy mentioned she wouldn't be as drunk if she tried it one time.. I sat there and said no no no no no and my "buddy" just said it wasn't a big deal. She should have known better but its been about 5 years now and everybody i know in that city has had a pass on her, haven't spoken to buddy in about 5 years. Another life ruined but fuck, i'm glad i made it out unscathed, who knew the beast that was lurking within.
I loved my ex and who she used to be. I left her because she didn't want me, was embarassed of me, and was cheating. It was better for both of us and we are both happy now. It's just said to have someone you loved so much change into a twisted cruel person. I loved her she didn't love me in the end, claimed she never did. I had to leave. It was toxic and she was so afraid of confrontation she hid it all. Closed up and refused to let me in. Looking back on it i hung on to keep the memories and have a false hope it would work out. In the end it was never worth it and caused me alot of pain and damage. I hated her for awhile for not being honest and hiding like a fucking coward and cheating, lying, using me in the process. I wanted nothing more than to bury her dead body. It's more complicated than that. Worst part was the day i left her i asked her why it went bad and she said "don't worry you did all you could, you did your best, i couldn't ask for more" to which i said "Well if my best isn't good enough what's that say about me?" no response. Those words right there crushed me and still undermine my ability to believe i can make anyone happy.
I've found it's helpful thinking about this stuff as a lesson to learn. It helps you to move on and find some benefit from the experience. It's one of those lessons that take time to learn though.
I did the same thing and it fucked me up bad for like 9 months but you will move on and meet someone new and better
I pushed my ex girlfriend away. She had brain injury as a baby and it made her a very simple person. Not slow, not stupid, just simple. She grew up in Puerto Rico and never learned to read or write. I think I devalued her to some extent and didn't appreciate her, my love for her, and everything she did for me, as I am disabled myself. I called her names (not ridiculous status but I would stick a quip in there whenever I got pissed,) we would get into escalating slap fights every once in a while and I would always get the last slap, and I would annoy her like when she was watching TV I would cuddle up next to her and be all ontop of her, and when she would say stop I didn't. I would also get mad when she didn't want to have sex with me. Anyways it pushed her away and she moved out. I was being abusive, not terribly or real bad, but abusive none the less, and it's the worst mistake I've ever made in my life. I'm happy I can admit to myself that it was my fault, and I pray to God every day for a second chance, because while I sabotaged the relationship, we were happy together the other 60-70 percent of the time, and she loved me and I loved here. Pray to God everyday for a chance to prove to her and myself that I can change and that an abusive person is not me.
A woman I loved dearly back in 1998 split up, no fight just a split. 14 years lather we got back together and have been together ever since and are getting married in June. part on good terms whenever possible.