So I'm back at home for the holidays and my friends and I always have fires in our backyard and just drink and smoke and such. Last night we heard a lot of random noise and strange things from the backyard. My neighborhood is really foresty so it's hard to see things more than 10 feet away. This morning my mom told me people in the neighborhood reported having stuff stolen (this has happened a ton in my parent's neighborhood over the past year) out of their cars and Christmas decorations missing and such. So, me and a couple of friends have decided to take it upon ourselves to bring these fools to justice. If anyone has any tips on how to catch these kids get at me, and I'll try to keep you guys updated on the status of these degens.
[quote name='"zombieSHROOM"']If you see kids taking stuff.... thats prolly them.[/quote] Holy fuck the way you just post things so casually its super fucking funny to me i don't know why.
You're gonna need to do this naked and covered in mud, so the fools can't smell you, next your going to need a bow and arrow and the arrow to have some sort of poison that will leave the fools paralyzed on the ground, next you're going to remove the persons pants and proceed to fuck the shit outta them to show your dominance, then you ejaculate onto said persons face, then to top it all of you rip a huge ass wet fart right in his eye to give him a nasty case of pink eye.
uh, leave something expensive/cool unattended (while hiding out with a buddy or two watching the spot) and if someone shows up, jump them.
Aim for the head and if they're running make sure to lead the shot. Or grab a magnifying glass and start investigating shit.
This might be a little harsh, and does involve kidnapping, but it would be hilarious if you found the guys who were doing this shit, throw them in a van, drive for like three or 4 hours, and just leave them somewhere. Don't say anything the entire time.
Chill outside at night with a menacing looking weapon. Remain hidden until you see the culprits and proceed to scare them.