Fuck weed is awesome.

I'm posting this in the Apprentice Section on purpose.
So for the past few months I have been trying to ease off smoking. Not only for the monetary benefits (trying to get ahead in life financial and all that), but because my state has very strict laws on cannabis which means most every employer DT's. Then Life said fuck you in less then a week I lost my job, got served papers (im getting sued), motorcycle that I just spent all my money on broke/almost killed me sorta, and realized that my closest friends were all shit heads (More than likely due to the fact that I am kind of a shit head that knows a bunch of fucked up wierdos), and realized the chick "closest" to me isn't worth even having her contact info anymore.

Let me set the scene for you.
It's 2 weeks since that all happened.
And I still associate with some fucked up people.
I'm 40 miles away from the nearest town with a wal-mart, deep in the backwoods, all you hear is the wind and what ever animal. Car's don't drive for hours at a time. And what am I doing? Raking leaves for my Grandma for some extra cash (not that I don't help her for free!!), FUCKING RAKING LEAVES DRIVES ME FUCKING INSANE. I hate nothing more in life then Raking leaves. Luckily for me I have avoided Raking for the last 5 years and mostly sub-contracted out younger Cousins to do it for me, but unfortuneatly times were tough and I needed to man up and rake. I had alot of time to think to myself. To much time to myself.



My whole life I have been trying so fucking hard to be the best at everything I do. Im sucking at it.

Fuck everything I thought I knew about living. Life should not be about constantly trying to get ahead. Life should not be about working your ass off 24/7 trying to get a paycheck. All your doing is running around in a little shit cage and you will never get ahead. Fuck having a job. Fuck working all your life so you can have a big house with a wife thats probably just a cunt deep down, and a bunch of kids. Who wants that shit. I want freedom. I want life.

I'm still trying to figure out what Life is about. But I think I am starting to realize that I should take things day by day. Laugh hard. Don't tell anyone everything you know. Think rationally and logically as much as possible. And don't trust people, because people have always been selfish assholes and always will be.


Fuck, i don't remember where i was going with this
*reads up*

Oh yeah, weed is awesome.
Cannabis makes the shit in life worth while. One toke and the whole world instantly makes perfect sense, and its a lot funnier then you'd think.


PS


This "raking needed areas" of the property are aprox. 2.4 acres which took a total of 13.75 hours to complete. Thats a lot of fucking leaves. God damn oak trees.

 

I'm 21, and have been "on my own" since a week after highschool (4 years?). I've had a couple jobs but mostly in the IT field. I got payed well enough to support myself and instead of saving what little extra money I did have I ended up spending it ALL on a Motorcycle which decided to brake on me during that whole ordeal (Bad financial decision to begin with on my part, should of held onto all my cash after I sold my old e34). I'd like to consider myself an Adult for the most part.

Unfortuneatly im on my ass back at my parents house. They are awesome, but it sucks and its wierd as fuck being back in my old room. I hate depending on anyone, even my parents. I guess I like being my own Man and having cash in my wallet like every other warm blooded human being.


Yeah. I'm not afraid of hard work, just something in my brain goes hay wire when ever I rake leaves Haha.


And hopefully one day I will have some good friends again, but I just don't see that happening in my home state anymore. I don't see a future in this place anymore. No matter how much I try to like it, its sort of a hell hole if you don't have Old money. I want to move to Colorado (that was sorta the plan with the bike to go up there for cheap and find a place to stay, then come back and get my car eventually, life said fuck you plans)



I've thought about opening my own business. Every since I was a kid I have always been "buying low selling high" pretty much anything. Hell I got kicked out of youth camp when I was 10 for selling Pokemon cards and cigarettes (yeah, my family is pretty southern babtist). SO I have always thought I could open up an onsite IT "anything technical" sorta deal, or maybe a used car dealership haha... Aim high.

 

Thanks for your great advice. I have not given up on creating a Life for myself that is for sure, I guess now I am just starting to have a different Point of View. Ever since I was younger I have been taught to be the best at everything I do to ultimeatly become a successful Adult which = happiness. Only now am I starting to understand that life is about happiness, and if your succesful along the way great.

Hmm that four wheeler is not a bad idea, I bet i could fab up something hah.
I've always had a pretty positive attitude in life, and for the most part keep positive people close to me and negative fucks away. I'm defineatly not a pro at digging up friends "positive traits". I tend to focus on the negative and maybe blow things out of proportions. I eventually realized that no one can be perfect



And thanks for all of the kind words everyone. I was pretty baked when I wrote this last night but I am pleasantly surprised that so many others related.