friend zone sucks (need advice)

Discussion in 'Sex, Love & Relationships' started by Northern.Lights, Feb 9, 2009.

  1. #1 Northern.Lights, Feb 9, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 9, 2009
    Ok Blades need your advice
    heres the story

    So i used to work for a piece of shit clothing company... and one day there is a new girl working... first time i saw her she looked like a fucking angel ( not kidding, she was standing under this bright light, which made her look like she was glowing lol)
    so anyway i get to talkin to this girl... blah blah blah she seems really cool and shes the most beautiful girl ive ever seen.
    We end up going on a date. I was such a geek now that i think back ahhaha. anyway we ended up dating for about a month then she said we needed a break. ( she decided not to talk to me after that lol) so that sucked, but whatever.

    i moved away for school to another city. about a year later... she was visiting friends in the city i now live in. I randomly ran into her on the street got to talking and shit ( she was there with a guy she was kinda dating at the time.) so she comes to visit every now and then and stays at my place. we slept in the same bed and shit but never did anything since we broke up. so i was thiking of telling her how i felt then but she always complained how her guy friends would end up telling her they like her. and she would always ask me if i was like that or if i wanted anything sexually from her. now fast forward a year and we're really close, she considers me her best friend, and she is mine as well. One problem, i am completly in love with her. i've know this for a long time. but last month she left the country to study abroad. we dont really talk that much and i dont get to see her at all considereing shes half-way around the world. I miss her to death and i really want to see her



    so my problem is ive never had the balls to tell her how i really feel. I am a really shy and extremely quiet to most people.

    i love this girl so much and i dont know what to do
    btw, shes a virgin, saving herself for when shes married, but is not a prude lol.
    btw she hates weed :( lol

    im extremely sorry for the grammar and shitty story ahah... and if you actually read this whole thing than thank you, I owe you a +rep

    I would love if some girls on this board would chime in as well :)

    thank you

     
  2. Once your in the friend zone its very very hard to get out. But if you really feel that she's the one for you then i'd tell her. You just gotta be ready for the fact that if you do end up telling her she could possibly never talk to you again.
     
  3. Dude just tell her.
     
  4. or things will never really be the same, oh how well I know this I cannot even begin to get into with this post.

    If she's your friend, she'll understand on one level or another, but once you're in that kind of position, it's...difficult, for lack of better words.

    I honestly and sincerely wish you the best of luck and hope things work out for you man.
     
  5. Friend zone does suck. I'm in a similar situation. I had a friend for a while and I've liked her since I met her. I actually did end up telling her I liked her, she didn't feel the same way. And it sucks.

    But man you got to go for it. Because if she ends up being in to you then that would be awesome. And if not, you can start trying to get over her. But you got to tell her man. Start by just trying to talk to her. Then once you guys have kind of reestablished yourselves, you should tell her your feelings.

    Or at least that's what I would do. But hey it didn't work for me so what would I know. :smoking:
     
  6. Friend Zone is one of those things that, once you're in, you can't get out of. It sucks but you just gotta move on.
     
  7. Friend. Zone. Sucks. seriously, I know everyone says "just move on," but after I did in a similar situation, another girl (who I am currently with and is wonderful) popped up. It took me multiple years to get over a friend-zone situation, but I'm happy with the way things turned out.
     
  8. Word up; you're in a deep hole with no tools and the walls have been greased


    Just wipe some of the grease off and masturbate for sure man
     
  9. Dude I know how you feel when I was a senior in high school i was really good friends with this girl and it totally fucking sucked bc I was in that friend zone ... Theres 2 things you can do:

    1) Tell her straight up that you've liked her for a long time and that you really do care about her

    or

    2) Don't tell her and everytime you see her you will be feel like shit, especially if shes dating someone. Worst thing that can happen is your not as good of friends anymore or not friends at all, but when you tell her you can just tell her that you dont want it to effect your friendship in any way I guess.
     
  10. if she drinks maybe wait drink w/ her and use the liquid confidence to tell her, and as everyone has said friend zone is pretty perminent unless if maybe you don't see her for a long time and the feelings can change. so in some ways her being gone can be a good thing
     
  11. Thats actually a pretty good idea ^^ as I asked this girl I was really good friends with what to do about a girl I liked and she told me for me to either have a lil bit to drink or for her to have a lil bit to drink and talk about it as your confidence will be up since you'll be under the influence... or you could tell her when your high but since she doesnt like weed and the fact that weed makes you paranoid that is probably not a good idea
     
  12. Don't over do the drink though. I did that once and made an ass of myself
     

  13. haha yeah.. drink enough to where you feel good and comfortable... but not too much where its noticeable that your drunk and cant walk straight.:hello:
     
  14. I agree that the friend zone is pretty difficult to get out of once you're in it. It's not impossible though... my husband was firmly in the friend zone for a year before he told me how he felt. 15 years later, and we're still together.
     

  15. this is the only drunk i know :p

    thanks everyone for the advice, looks like im gonna have to grow a pair and tell her when she comes back. :eek:
     
  16. My god, I feel for you man.

    Same position with every girl i've ever met.

    Just tell her, you'll be less of a pussy than me + 5/8ths of the men in the city.
     
  17. dont drink when you tell her man, shes just gonna think youre drunk talking being a dumbass.

    you just gotta tell her man, be honest but dont over do it. refrain from things like 'i want to be with you forever', etc. i would suggest you tell her over some dinner or something. next time you see her (hopefully whenever she comes back for break?) i would just invite her over and casually ask her if shed like to go out and get something to eat. try to find a place to sit with some privacy and let her know how you feel. good luck man.
     
  18. honestly the best bet is to do it right when it feels the most awkward. it will probaly be the best time, and catch her off gaurd. then it will show her how much you like her by doing it in the most awkward pos. possible.

    and i wouldnt wait till she gets back, dont want her coming back with an "enrique":rolleyes: who swept her off her feet.
     
  19. HE WHO HESITATES, MASTERBATES! Seriously it's been like that since the dawn of man! girls like confidence and honesty and from your post your part in this "relationship" lacks both.

    I'd be like "I know you asked a long time if i had more than "friendly" feelings for you and I have to tell you now that i lied... i just didn't think of myself as being like all those other guys who just want a piece... i want the whole thing.

    Then I will license you to use my patent pending move. At the right moment just pull out your junk... seriously what percentage of times have you showed a chick your junk and you didn't get some? guaranteed to work more than 80% of the time all the time.
     
  20. Damn dude I have a super similar situation.. friend zone is close to impossible to get out of.. I've been trying for like a month. I'd say try to tell her. She will probably say no (nothing against you but that's how the friend zone works) because she won't want to lose you as a friend (or at least that's what the girl I liked said).

    And it will most likely be awkward for a week then it will go back to normal. And sorry for the extremely pessimistic post but you'll keep liking her and she won't feel the same way and it will suck. Yeah that's my situation.

    But all in all I'd recommend telling her because it will be worse to have those feelings eating at you and at least if you tell her, you'll know you've done all you can. And maybe she'll even say yes! Good luck.
     

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