DRUG TEST IN 2 Days!! PLEASE HELP IF YOU CAN!!

So I have a drug test in 2 days and I'm scared I will fail. I last smoked yesterday (it had been about 3 weeks before that). I'm very athletic and think I may be able to clean my system but don't wanna chance it.

It's not monitored, I go in a bathroom all alone, so anything I can fit in a place that isn't my pockets(they must be emptied) is fine.

I'm thinking of using a condom filled with a friends clean piss. putting that in briefs(wearing maybe 3 pairs of briefs to keep in warmth) and probably a hand warmer in there somewhere as well. The test is at Lab Corp, so it has to be within like 1 degree of 98.6F or they throw it out thus the insulation and heat element.

Will this keep it the right temp? I know it will be warm enough, I'm just worried it may be too warm.

Anybody ever tried this? HELP ME OUT PLEASE!!!

 

They DO care about temp. that's the problem. It's for a seasonal county job i do every year and they have a temp strip on the vile. I pee in cup, they pour into vile, they write down temp and send it off.

My friend who I will be getting it from lives literally 2 minutes from the place, so I guess temp should be ok. Also, I will store it in my perineum (gooch) with multiple layers of underwear so I may not need a hand warmer.

I'm gunna go get 2 home test strips now though. I may already be clean. I seriously get clean quick. Once did an experiment where I smoked on a sunday, went about my usual routine with no exercise or heavy fluid drinking and tested myself that tuesday and it read clean. So I may not use my friends piss anyway.

We'll just see where Im at Wednesday morning for this one. If the strip reads clean, I'm golden, if not, I use the condom.

 

I think I probably am going to do the condom and hand warmer thing.

I bought some nonlubricated condoms(just in case the lube does something, and some hand warmers from WalMArt.

I'm going to find the right combination/placement of underwear and hand warmers to keep it the right temp for at least 20 minutes.

Who knows, I may not need the hand warmers at all. My Taint might keep it warm enough on its own. I let you guys know how that goes once I test it out.

 

Yea I don't think I'll be nervous. I can usually handle sketch situations. I'm a lifeguard (thats the job I'm getting tested for) have been for a few years.

If I can handle pull some dying tourist out of 6ft surf and rip currents and set him up on O2 while radioing in for an ambulance and strapping him to a backboard to get him up there before he dies... I hope I can handle this :V haha

I have a condom and hand warmer in my gooch right now. Hope the temp turns out right for this test run!!

 

So I've run 3 trials now.

Trial 1) i used no hand warmer, just pee in condom. Tie it off, put in gooch(under 3 layers of briefs). I went back to my studies for ~20min. went to bathroom poked with needle, drained into cup(about same amount I would give for sample, plastic cup I used is about same thickness as test cup)... put in thermometer. the temp read 94.3 F.

Trial 2) same as trial 1 but I put 1 hand warmer right on my innermost underwear layer(so touching condom). 20 min later I emptied into cup. temp read 96.1 F. I finished letting the condom drain and took a normal piss(I've been flushing just in case ), this took about 30 second or so. check temp again and it read 94.7F.

Trial 3) same drill. only this time I used 2 hand warmers. 1 right on my skin above the condom and 1 below as before. After 20 min in there the temp read 96.9F. I finished cleaning up, pissing again(man I'm flushin hard!) again about 30sec pass. check again, temp is 94.5F. Decide to wait another 30sec and try again. Temp then reads 92.4F.

Just to be sure I put the thermometer between the hand warmers alone and it read 109.8F. so it's definitely keeping it warm enough when in the pants.

From these trials it's clear the urine does not stay 98.6F for very long once leaving your body.
Not to mention, when they test me. I go into the bathroom, the pee travels from dick to cup in the air(loses some heat in route). Then I set the cup on the counter while I finish peeing(loses temp while there). Then once I'm done ~2min or so after going in, they pour the sample into 2 separate viles (loses temp while being poured), and thats when temp is checked with a color strip stuck to outside of cup. for a total of about 2min30sec from initial piss.

From this knowledge it's clear that the piss is never 98.6F when they check (unless you have a fever so its higher to begin with). Plus, they use a color strip which means they only check for a certain temp range. So I'm pretty sure that as long as the piss is warmer than 90F when they check, it's fine. Otherwise every sample would be invalid.

2:30 min time with a loss of about 1 F every 30 secs (only saying 1 degree to be generous) gives us a loss of about 5 degrees until the temp is checked.

so if it's 98.6 when coming out, its 93.6F when they check. However, it probably drops faster than that. And you may take longer to pee than others. Maybe your pee shy?

I still plan to use 2 or more hand warmers, just for safety, but I'm pretty sure that if your pissing at LabCorp, your fine so long as the temp is higher than 90F (don't quote me on this until I come back with my results).

Seems that this method is yet another way to pass a test in a crunch. That is if you are not monitored and can't afford a whizzinator, but with this method you don't even need one!

I'll report back after the test, though I won't know if I pass until a week or so later. If I pass nothing happens and I continue on to work. If I fail I get a phone call letting me know I don't have the job.

 

Forgot to mention. I pissed in the cup just straight up and checked the temp and it read 93.6F when I brought it out of the bathroom.

Temp is definitely nothing to worry about as long as you have some hand warmers in your pants

 

So I I went in and took that test last Wednesday. Everything went great!!!

Temp was in the right range and they never suspected me of having a condom full of urine in my pants :V

I was right about the temp having to be in a range, from 90F to 100F.

I also haven't received a call saying I failed the test yet, so thats good as well.

Looks like this turned out to be a pretty good method.
Keep smokin!