Two buddies, Jeff and Steve, are getting very drunk at a bar when suddenly Jeff throws up all over himself. "Oh, no, Jane will kill me!! " Steve says, "Don't worry, pal. Just tuck a twenty in your breast pocket and tell Jane that someone threw up on you and gave you twenty dollars for the dry cleaning bill." So they stay for another couple hours and get even drunker. Eventually Jeff rolls into home and his Jane starts to give him a bad time. "You reek of alcohol and you puked all over yourself! My God you are disgusting!" Speaking very carefully so as not to slur, Jeff says "Nowainaminit, I can e'splain everything! Itsh not what you thinks, I only had a couple drinks! But this other guy got sick on me...He'd had one too many and couldn't hold his liquor! He said he was sorry an' gave me twenty bucks for the cleaning bill! " Jane looks in his breast pocket and says "But this is forty dollars!" "Oh yea..." says Jeff. "I almost forgot! He shit in my pants too!"