Door to door bible people...

Discussion in 'Real Life Stories' started by Dalton!, Feb 13, 2011.

  1. So i started the morning with a wake and bake, and as i'm chilling i hear a knock on my door, i think "Who could this be at 9:30 on a sunday morning??" I open the door and see a black woman who is like literally straight from africa and her daughter that have been here once befor, with some pamphlets about Jesus Christ, normally i would just blow her off but I was high, and decided sure why not.

    So, I'm talking to her and it goes a something like this

    Her: your name is dalton, right?
    Me: uh yea
    Her: Why aren't you in church this morning?
    Me: i don't really go to church
    Her: Do you not love God?
    Me: im kinda more into science
    ------ At this point her daughter starts screaming and crying, because the neighbors black cat is walking on the apartment stair towards her. She is literally freaking out over a house cat

    Her(The girls mom): WHat are you doing??? dont be scared its just a cat.. oh my god...
    Her: Science is good, scientists help us in many ways but you need jesus
    Me: ...(Trying not to laugh my high ass off) The cat is nice, his name is spunk...he wont attack you calm down!!!
    Her: Would you like to come to my church?

    She kept talking for like ten minutes about God and jesus while her daughter was screaming over a cat. I could barely take standing there.

    Good morning so far, maybe another bowl... kinda hungry...
  2. religious people are so stupid. they always think people who don't "love god" are missing something in their life LOL.

    like helloo... i'm fine... we don't all have to be told how to live our life :)
  3. btw OP i've done that before when high... i decided to take a survey over the phone yesterday... usually i just yell at those bastards... but i guess weed makes you more chill to put up with the dumb shit like door to door bible humpers lol
  4. One time two of them came to my door, this is what happened:

    Me: good morning
    They: Good morning, would you like one of these booklets about addictions to all kinds of things?
    Me: Sure why not. *looks at the booklet and looks at the back* Why is there a picture of Jesus and fire and why does it say that judgement day is coming?
    They: We're spreading the word of Jesus Christ.
    Me: Then why did you disguise it as if it had nothing to do with religion?
    They: To make people more interested.
    Me: Thanks, but I don't like being fooled into reading your message.
    They: Alright then, goodbye.

    At least they were friendly but I think that was fucked up. The front of the pamflet showed no relation to religion whatsoever.

  5. Get lost rookie. If you aren't religious doesn't let you bash on religions so why don't you step out idiot.

  6. why don't YOU "step out" i can say whatever i want. that's my opinion.

    you don't have to act all butthurt about it. is this seriously the first time someone has bashed religion? learn to deal with it better or you're going to be one unhappy god lover throughout your life.
  7. #7 PlantSomeTrees, Feb 13, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 14, 2011
    Sure you can have your shit opinions that you will regret forever but still doesn't give you a reason to bash now gtfo newbie thx.

    disrespect doesn't fly here /pawlywog
  8. Haha we get a lot of these where I live, usually I answer the door in my boxers, the conversations never last more than a few seconds.
  9. I'm not sure what they're thinking. Do they honestly believe showing up on someones doorstep with a pamphlet and some versus is going to change someone to their religion

    Two things.

    They are either half smart and think everyone else is stupid, or they're just to stupid to think what they are doing through.
    • Like Like x 1

  10. hey PlantSomeTrees... you mad or something bro? :rolleyes:
  11. If you dont go to church this is what God will do if you're not a Jehova's Witness!
    [ame=]YouTube - This is What Jehovah's Witnesses Actually Believe[/ame]

  12. i lol'd. how can people believe that everyone but the select few who share your faith will receive eternal rest, whereas the rest of us go to hell?

    no religion makes sense for that sole reason. i can still be a really good person, but just because i believe in something different, i deserve to suffer for eternity?

    LOL, okay.
  13. I have never had anyone come to my door about religion.

    Apparently they do their research...
  14. if someone came to my door to express their religious beliefs to me, id tell them to get the fuck off my property and slam the door in their face...i dont walk around neighborhoods telling people my beliefs, so u shudnt either
  15. I don't mind them doing it. They believe that they should share their beliefs with others. If they want to do that, fine. As long as they piss off when I tell them to.

  16. yeah but i dont share the same beliefs...i could care fucking less what they believe, gtfo off my doorstep with that religious bullshit...religious people piss me off cuz they seriously believe the bullshit coming out of their mouth, so fucking retarded

    honestly if they come to my house and waste my time with bullshit i dont agree with, im gonna be the biggest asshole i can be

    i know its part of their beliefs to "spead the word" but like i said, i dont give a fuck what u believe in...the way i see it, they are just dumbasses
  17. My dad is a senile, retired old man and he loves to read these Jehovah's Witness magazines that they put out. Just yesterday the really nice old man, and some young black male assistant stopped by to drop them off. I answered the door blazed and it went something like this.

    Him: Hi! Your name is ___, right?
    Me: Yep
    Him: How did you enjoy last months issue?
    Me: (I didn't even read it) I thought it was good, it was about the good and evil and God's plan with it, right? (I only remember this from what he told me last month when he dropped it off)
    Him: Yes, I think so. I was in the area so I thought I'd stop by and drop this months magazines off. There is a really interesting article here. It is entitled, "Can the Bible and science get along?" (He then shows me an excerpt from the article quoting some "Job" thing and it talks about the Earth being round, and God says something like the Earth is suspended by nothing, etc. And it mentions Earth being made like 3,000 years ago or something)
    Me: Does it cover anything about fossils? Science have found fossils hundreds of millions of years old.
    Him: I think it may say something about that, have a nice day, Mr. ___.

  18. Hey uhh... Update.. Gods fake... And notice how the religous kid^^ is more of an asshole than the non religous ones. Fucking christians

  19. Ah man you fucked up, they are going to keep coming back for YEARS.

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