My Dad gave me some money while I was visiting him in Florida, $500. He was drunk the entire time that I was visiting him, so the money was sort of an apology. Yesterday I went out and bought a vaporizer and a grinder at a local head shop for $200. My Mother (parents are divorced), went online into MY bank account and looked at the $200 charge at the head shop. She called up the place and found out what they sold. Just just called me on the phone and confronted me about it, and I didn't lie to her. I told her straight up that I bought a vaporizer for smoking weed (she found out I was smoking pot a few weeks ago-by logging onto MY personal computer and looking at all of my bookmarks about growing, etc...). She gave me this huge talk about how weed "fries my brain" and that I shouldn't be using it during a time in my life where I need to be attending school. I tried to explain to her the real facts, but she won't believe any of it. Shes extremely narrow-minded. Anyway, she said if I don't return it (they don't have a return policy, plus I've already used it), shes going to call up my Dad and tell him what I spent the money on. My Dad has been an alcoholic for the past 20+ years, so if he finds out that I'm involved with "drugs" he would get really pissed, plus I'm sure he doesn't want to hear that I'm spending the money he gave me on "drugs". My Mom does have a valid point about something though, they are supporting me (paying for my food, gas, and car insurance. I'm paying for all of my education with money I've had saved up). She is angry that I'm spending the money that I get on drugs, instead of helping them out. I really can see why she is mad, because money is pretty tight (my mom and my step-dad both make decent money-we are just tight right now because of the economy and everything). I'm not too sure how to handle this situation, so any opinions would be awesome. I've tried having a real conversation about marijuana with her, but she is extremely ignorant when it comes to this situation. I've thought about talking to my Dad about marijuana, and just letting my Mom tell him what I bought; but I don't think that will go over well. My relationship with my Dad lately has been very "shaky" and this news would easily make us enemies.
Show her some websites that arent government funded, that show the actual facts about weed. Or you could start talking to your dad about it before your mom gets a chance, so when she does call him she will feel like and idiot cause he already knows.
Change all your passwords....... Using winXP? put a password on your log-in picture... and setup the windows security password thingy....
Yea, I'm changing all of my passwords right now. I'm still kinda angry that she went into my computer, and into my bank account without any permission. I think I'm just going to let her tell my Dad. If my Mom really pushes my buttons, I'll just drop out of school and use all the money I had saved up to get an apartment. Or at least I will say I'll do that, I'm sure they would get worried then.
Oh and if you ARE 18, her looking at your bank account IS against the law. Shove it in her face, call the five O if she gives you trouble. "You're breaking the law, why cant I?"
Yea I should do that, I'm pretty sure it was also against the law for her to go into my personal computer- read my e-mails, bookmarks, and files on my computer. I'm currently a sophomore in college, so I think if I can tell her I'm going to drop out, she'll lay off. Right now I'm getting a bunch of legit sources, and I'm going to tell her all of the facts when she gets home.
I would have no problem getting the law involved, but my parent's are very caring people and they support me. I respect them, I just think they are very ignorant when it comes to certain topics. Luckily I start school up next week, it's going to be nice to get away from home for a while. I really only live with them during the summer. I'm just planning to have a long conversation about it when she gets home, stating the facts and consequences. I'm going to prove to her that I'm responsible with it. I'm going to talk about how what I'm doing is better than what most college kids do- get hammered all the time. My Dad has a very bad history with drinking problems, so I'm sure she would be glad to see that I'm not going down that path.
Don't call the cops on her... She obviously just cares about you. It doesn't necessarily make her ignorant either (most adults aren't as ignorant or as stupid as 18 year olds think they are). She has experience with substance abuse, and doesn't want to see you go down that path. I'm a mom of a 9 year old, and even though I've been smoking forever, I wouldn't be very happy if I was supporting him and he was spending his money on weed and $200 bongs and shit. There ARE negative side effects to weed, and you are experiencing them right now. Do you really want to risk the relationship with your family over weed? If you want to prove to her that it's not effecting your life, then respect respect her wishes, sell the vaporizer, and stop smoking while they are supporting you.
Believe me, I completely agree with you. I understand that she just wants the best for me, but she definitely is very ignorant. She won't even really let me defend my stance/give my side of the story. She immediately started saying a bunch of the government propaganda crap- frying my brain, lung cancer, and extreme memory problems. I know there are negative side effects of weed, but I feel that it's my choice (I'm an adult and I should be able to make my own decisions). After next week, they won't be supporting me anymore because I'm moving back to school. The situation would probably be a lot easier to deal with if my Dad didn't have substance abuse problems. She thinks I'm going to go down the same road as my Dad. There's quite a difference between being an alcoholic and smoking a few times a week.
there're only two real dangers to smoking weed, the first is getting caught coz it's illegal and the second is bronchial damage coz you're inhaling smoke into your lungs. The second one is NOT because it's specifically marijuana smoke, it's just that you're inhaling any type of smoke into your lungs. Well a vaporizer eliminates the second danger coz with a vape you don't get any smoke into your lungs. So you can tell them you bought it to make you safer, and you smoke (sorry, vape) weed coz you don't want to become an alcoholic like your dad ..that shit's supposed to run in your genes so you're taking sensible and practical precautions to keep yourself safe. The other danger, from the law, is all that's left. Tell them to contract their elected officials and demand an end to the federal marijuana prohibition. Tell them the prohibition is forcing people like you to stay away from marijuana (which has never killed a single person) and encourage you to use alcohol (and you know the dangers of that!) and to be around people who use pharmaceuticals and hard drugs (like meth and crack). Tell the the marijuana prohibition sends the wrong message to our country's youth and they need to speak out loudly against it. GL man, if you want more facts about the pros (and cons) of using marijuana I'd be happy to give them to you.
The problem is that when you are a mom, the love and protectiveness you feel for your kid outweighs ANY logic.
I printed off a bunch of websites, I'm fairly confident that I have plenty of information now. You have some excellent points and I'm sure I'll use them in our conversation later tonight. Thanks for the help!