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depersonalization, i am certain of it

Discussion in 'Seasoned Marijuana Users' started by 420 stoner 420, Sep 11, 2007.

  1. my god. i know it's a common ... i forgot the word. withdrawal, that's it. it's a common withdrawal symptom. i have not smoked in twelve days. almost two weeks. it feels like a month has gone by. all that is around me is so alien, yet i know what it is and can easily recognize it. i am constantly confused about everything that goes on within my mind. i am in a spin and it won't stop. i was thinking of suicide earlier. yes, actually. i'd probably never go through with it, but i was still thinking of how i'd kill myself, if i were to.

    everything is terribly pointless. no meaning to anything. at first i kind of liked it. now, it's too confusing. i do things, as if i am on auto-pilot. without a second thought. i am going to relapse, i think. what's wrong with smoking once or twice a month? that's a much more difficult challenge than none at all. anyone else have experience with something like this?
     
  2. Seems to me your just depressed. Depersonalization is alot more mentally dibilitating in the short term.

    If you were thinking about suicide, maybe you need to not smoke? if withdraw is this bad for you. I know id be in some shit if i didnt smoke for 12 days.

    That would suck... But why cant you smoke? are you just dry?

    If your serious about help..

    Id say the thing that helped my depression the most is working my ass off everyday. Sometimes, work gets to be too much, but your still working, and keeping your mind off useless bullshit.
     
  3. i quit smoking because i thought it would make my grades suffer. i am not depressed, though. i wasn't really thinking about the suicide thing seriously. it just seemed like another daily thought type of thing. i'm not sad, really, i am just seriously confused.

    thanks
     
  4. Id suggest talking to someone, be it a psychologist or psychiatrist.

    Why not, try and not be so geared towards getting high, and save it till after you do all your assignments, and have a peer check them over.

    As a reward, that night you light up a blunt.

    Tolerance will go down, grades will improve, and so will your general, everyday life.

    Have a good day bro. Keep your head up.
     

  5. that's 100% true. work makes u less depressed.
     
  6. i'm gonna go smoke some hash :eek:

    thanks
     
  7. wow, i cleaned my room, made some food, ate it and smoked some more. but what does it all mean?
     

  8. What does it have to mean? seriously your thinking way too hard.
     

  9. you're just livin' life. dont think about it. we dont have time to worry about stuff like taht because it wont mean anything in the end. just LIVE and ENJOY
     
  10. If it's just for grades...

    Just smoke late at night, maybe a few hours before bed or right before. You might have depression, you just never noticed it because the weed was treating it. If you're worried getting high will make you fuck up, just be high in your sleep so you can benefit from the head change in the morning.
     
  11. Ye i think working is the answer because when your at work all day you cant wait to get home, and when you finally get home life is just so sweet. you only get one life so live it good enjoy yourself,theres nothing wrong with visiting the burning bush every now and again. :)
     
  12. This is my second day of not smoking. I was in the same boat as you were yesterday, except the suicide part. I felt myself almost cry over little things like being overwhelmed with my courses. I was depressed, but that all changed when I woke up today. I think you should quit for at least 2 months, to see how life is. I'm quitting untill my birthday (a month from tomorrow). Trust me, my highs suck compared to before, so I'm taking a T-Break.
     
  13. I've been depressed for years. when im high im not depressed. its hard for me bc i got no money so im smoking a little weed trying to conserve. right now im not really depressed. weed gets rid of depression for me.

    i thought about suicide when i was 16. i went years depressed, just started smokin daily like 3-4 months ago and ive noticed so much change. being high lets me become who i am. when im depressed i sit on my pc, watch movies, eat mass junk food.


    Some people think its pathetic i smoke every day, but you know when u got depression that it sucks not to smoke. ppl think thats a problem. but its not a problem at all, depression is the problem, not the weed. Weed is the cure to that. It sounds like you do have depression. Get high and enjoy life! When I got a stash ill smoke 3-4 js a day, every 3-4 hours apart. after i smoke a j im great, not depressed, so weird knowing what it feels like to do shit with your life. i smoke with friends too, ontop of my j's or bowls i smoke. i was in the same boat ur in now, but I decided that my depression is the real problem, not the smoking part. If people don't like that than they can fuck off.

    a little tip for when u start a t-break get really, really ripped before you stop and hope it lasts a day. lol

    high>depression any day of the week
     
  14. ya man its definitely not withdrawal i stopped for 6 weeks cold turkey. Basically went from smoking almost everyday to not at all and i was straight. Weed does not cause physical addiction but sometimes it cause mental addiction (when you think that you need it to function). Maybe you have the mental addiction but maybe you are also just depressed.
     
  15. I have read in some medical journals depression is a common symptom of withdraw in heavy users. I have battled with depression my whole life. The best thing you can do if you are feeling down and out like theres just a dark cloud around you is to talk to some one about it. Any one! Just talking to some one about whats going on helps a great deal. Keeping it inside does not help the cause. Go talk to some one any one who will listen trust me.
     
  16. I felt the same way when I moved here an couldnt get any.... After about a month you stop noticing it. I felt depersonalization, some stupid (like what you get paranoid about when high) anxietys, and I was always pissy. Weed's good and all, but you should learn to be happy without it first if you have a problem with that.
     
  17. I wouldn't be too worried about thinking about suicide; I think everyone toys with the idea at some point. I have bad mood swings; not bad enough to be manic depressive or anything (I'm not suicidal when I'm depressed, and I'm not psychotic when I'm happy), but some days I feel like my limbs weigh 100 lbs each and I don't feel like doing anything but moping around worrying, crying about little things, then yelling at myself for being a little bitch ("there are people starving to death right now and here I am crying about some fucking paper"), and that just makes me feel worse.

    Usually it's like I have one day when I'm really really depressed and just cry all day, but then the next day I feel *so* fucking good, and after that I'm neutral for a few weeks until it happens again. It isn't that bad, but weed seems to completely eliminate both phases; it makes me feel happy but not hyper either. So if I smoke a lot over a long period of time and then stop, the mood-swings seem way more severe because I'm not used to them. After a month or so of readjustment I'm used to them and can deal with them though, so it's probably just temporary. You're used to being constantly medicated and you just quit your meds cold-turkey, you gotta expect things like this :)

    Also, I really don't think weed will hurt your grades. Just use weed as a reward. Roll a nice joint and say "okay I can't smoke this until I finish all of my papers". If anything it'll help your grades.
     
  18. figure out your goals in life like the things that meen the most to you then figure out how you can improve upon those things. figure out what makes you happy then go do it. i find that people get to caught up in other people lifes as well as material goods. im not saying thats you its just somthing to think about.:wave:
     
  19. Could it be you smoked so much that you where never able to think so damn hard about everything and now that your "sober" your thinking wayyy to much?

    I donno :smoke:
     

  20. First of all, getting advice on forum dedicated to marijuana use and legalization ain't exactly the most objective place to do so.

    Second, marijuana use or the lack thereof is not your problem. Have you thought about talking to a therapist about depression and/or mental illness? It sounds to me like you've been self medicating. Several months back my nephew was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder this is an illness that has devastated my family. My mother, one brother and my twin sister are Bipolar. Her son is the nephew I'm referring to. He ended in a psych ward after a very scary and dangerous psychotic episode. The Psychiatrist told him the marijuana was used as a treatment for mental illness and was one of the best treatments with the least amount of side effects. A psychiatrist told him this. So he got off the 500 dollar a month meds (which we all pitched in to pay for) and started using marijuana exclusively. He's working full time and doing very well.

    What you seem to be describing to me is called Dissociation. It's usually linked to PTSD. I think maybe you should seek professional help? Seriously.
     

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