Damn the birds and the beez (explicit text)

Discussion in 'Sex, Love & Relationships' started by kms brown, Feb 19, 2009.

  1. So my friend and I have been hangin out with this chick for a while now. Shes alot of fun to talk with because what she says is ignorant, but its not stupid ignorant, its well thought out and comical ignorant.

    Anyway, I was out of the car having a smoke and got back in. And I hear "No I dont think he will, but Im not gonna bet on it."

    So I ask "Who will bet on what?"

    This chick turns and looks at me and says "That I can get you to fuck me."

    Now, ive been thinking about fucking her all night. So Im kind of at a loss for that comment, so i just laugh like it was a joke. She says "No, Im serious, he doesnt think that i could get you to fuck me."

    At this point im thinking to myself, fucking for the sake of proving a point, sounds like shes got standards! So I tell her "No, Im not gonna say why cause last time I said this to a girl I got slapped."

    So she says "What? Im not gonna slap you."

    "Well you told me you dont give head and thats kind of a big deal for me." I say smiling.

    Then she looks me in the eyes and says "I dont need to."

    So I say "Chris, how much money do you have on this bet? And what are you betting on me doing."

    He says "I didnt wanna take the bet, i thought you would say no but i didnt know."

    Laughing I say "Damn, you fool, we could have made some money."

    So we talked about it for a little bit more then she started telling me a bunch of stuff on what she likes and doesnt like, etc. then conversation carried on. I figured it was all in good fun. But as we were dropping her off at her car, i got out to smoke and and she did too. So we started talking then she asked if I wanted a ride home. I said that Chris would take me. She then told me that she wanted to take me. I said that Ill ride with chris cause hes already planning on it, maybe another time. Then said good bye and got in the car.

    So Im sittin here like DAMN IT. This girl is gorgeous I would so hit that, but damn it, just to prove a point? So now Im at a battle between my mind and instinct, what do i do?!
  2. you fucking fuck up.

    dont fuck up like i did.

    fuck her. fuck her. fuck her. fuck her. fuck her. wear a condom. fuck her.
  3. You were rocking it and playing all your cards right untill here and you blew it. Then you blew it again here. And then you had one last chance and you really blew it here. It was never really about proving a point, I found that girls love to offer sex/nudity for a wager or in a game. I think its because, deep down, they think its better they are just "following the rules" and thus dont want to admit the fact they are horny or want to get down. If your going to go for it, make sure you go big and make sure she knows you want to fuck her because that is what she was really trying to figure out in the first place based on your reaction. Ive been in the same boat before and it sucks, you know the only thing that held you back that night was your own nerves. You are really going to have to go out strong and initiate something if its going to happen. Best of luck man.
  4. yeah you fucked up, i would've been all over that after the double check, shoulda just taken her to the bathroom and hit it right over the toilet...she's nasty so she'd fuck in a bathroom
  5. Here is what you need.

    1) Get viagra
    2) Crush up viagra
    3) Make a rail of viagra
    4) Call said woman
    5) Bump that rail
    6) Enjoy my advice.

    Snort. Fuck. Peace.

  6. I think I have some things in common with this guy. It's a shame.

    WOW, I wonder if I was retarded back in the day.
  7. even as a chick i think you should so hit that. she obviously wants it.
  8. why did you ride home with your friend? she was OBVIOUSLY gonna fuck you..and all you had to do was say yes!
  9. you could have saved your friend some gas and got your dick wet... maaaan
  10. you shouldve taken the ride but now at least you know shes into you. call her up or something.
  11. i guess the person she made the bet with knew that you were fucking half-tard!:smoke:
  12. Dude just call her up with some excuse on why you didnt want to fuck that night, and then go over to her house or something.
  13. hopefully she still wants to fuck.

    i had a chance with this chick once and she was insanely dope. she was pretty easy too. so we were walking around the waterfront where i live and her dad and niece kept calling and calling and calling so i got annoyed and told her to cut her phone off, but she kept it on in case of an emergency or some bullshit. so i got tired of it and drove her ass home and when she was bout to get out she wanted to give me a kiss and i told her to get out ( i was pissed i wasted my time, gas, weed, etc.).

    she asks me to go on a date the friday after that one and i was like "why so you can waste my time some more? im good, id rather stay at home and sleep."

    at the time it made sense but god damn it now when i think about it i would like to fuck her now. its not going to happen tho, cause she thinks i hate her now and just want to use her.
  14. ^okay, I've got a shorter pathetic story of how I was(hope was and not is. hope to never make these kinda mistakes again) retarded.

    So I worked with this young slovakian chick in Montana. really big tits(not too big, though) and overall cute shape and face. She'd call me darling and touch my stomach ALL THE TIME! she invites me to meet her and the other europeans at the towns little music festival one night. (asking me out on a date) I'm like "ya, maybe I'll come by" yada yada. I smoke some weed and then I think I'm too stoned...goddamit. She ends up finding some czech guy who isn't retarded a couple weeks later. That's like a year and a half ago. I think I've grown out of that retardation. ....i shouldn't be saying retard this much. that's really dissing on them CUZ I'M DUMB AS FUCK!

    hmmm, guess I made that longer than I planned on making it.
  15. #16 kms brown, Feb 20, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 20, 2009
    shit. lol i guess i did fuck up pretty bad, ive just never had a chick be so upfront about it so i figured it was some kind of ploy. Im not too worried about it though, we listen to the same music and do the same shit. I figure that if I hook up some free lift tickets to go snowboarding at loveland and some V.I.P. passes to the club Ill be good, the best part is it wont cost me a dime!

    The funny part is I told my friend at work today what had happened and he just stopped dead in his tracks, looked at me and said. "For once could you just swallow your pride so you could get your dick wet? I mean What the fuck, its not every day you got some bitch telling you she wants to fuck right then and there. Your an idiot."

    Here I was thinking, hey I wont be that guy who thinks with his dick and instead ill just play it cool, score some points for being a nice guy. I guess my dick is smarter than my brain hahahaha.

    Plus were plannin on going to a rave soon, so its a sure fire fuck. The E makes the easy EEZY!
  16. you just cockblocked yourself...likes 3 times lol.
  17. Get a helmet on that soldier before he see's some action !!!!!!
  18. dude everyone drops the ball at some point...some just drop the ball on a fast break in game 7...u fuckd up
  19. I'm sure she's thinking "Damn i got proven wrong." :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

    You need to get on that.

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