Regardless of situation, surroundings life/life style, people around me. I seem to continuously fall into this pit of depression. Worst part is I can have a good day then just break down like there's 4 walls surrounding my mind, rock climbing I am almost up but something always flicks my fingers lose and I fall back down. Life is getting tiring and I'm getting sick of this depression, and to be honest physically degrading. Lately as I grow and life gets more complicated i seem to fall deeper. Constantly voices remind me it's not all ok and I shouldn't feel ok. As of right now I've quit all substances weed caffeine booze everything , ( last 1-2 months). everything just getting worse and worse,my mind is breaking. I don't know if it's after abusing all stimulants and depressants it's now coming back to haunt me. But to be honest my mental state is worse why bother being sober, at lease after a few beer and a fat blunt I can snooze a couple of hrs instead of lying there staring at the roof just straight up confused on what I'm feeling inside. I'm just looking for advice I guess to get back up on my feet. As I said I just keep falling down continuously, it's been this way since I was young. Parents, teachers, principal, gf, then wife, friends, never believed in me, I know it's pathetic to be dependant on someone to lift you up. But when you've been on your own all your life even when people pretend to be part of you're life, they don't... they are just there to bring you down in the end. Do you pretend to be cocky and strong do you just accept the depression what do you do. No one ever really has had any faith in me and why should they, I fail most things I am good at failing. I suck as a employee as a boyfriend, as a son I was just a continuous failure never lived up to there expectations... friends well I never really had many my only true friend lives miles and miles and miles away. I just want one shot to make it but even when it's there i fail some how because of this black cloud inside my mind, I can't get rid of it I can't wake up and get in the grove it's starting to ruin me. The darkest corners the darkest hallways lead to light. I have been told, but where is the light where the fuck can I find it.
The trick is not who you are when your self who are you when your bullshitting to the world and everyone else Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum
What's your purpose in life? Or at least for now? Gotta put your mind toward focusing on something. Humans need a purpose in life to be content it seems at least through what I've experienced. Good luck man
yeah your right about a goal, a purpose,for general feeling low or lost in life. but if someone suffers from bipoler or clinical depression it will always niggle away. its not a choice to be depressed with such things, its a chemical imbalance which seems to give that person a negative view of things. i'm neither bipoler or clinical . i'm someone who has had little bouts of depression which i can put down to relationship splits or maybe struggling for money , i found exercise very good for clearing your mind. weights,cycling,running.swimming,walking. that sort of thing. it clears the mind and when that reward chemical kicks in , you do feel better. there is a difference between clinical depression and someone just feeling a bit lost or down. with him saying he always seems to remember having depression, then maybe its clinical depression or bipoler. there has been people with bipoler that had great careers,no struggling for money, love in their life and everything should be roses, but they feel its not. they feel there is always something niggling them away .
What is your goal in posting this? I assume you are hoping someone will give you some sound advice that you can apply to your life. You recognize that what you have done has not worked for you. What does it mean to be a good child, a good boyfriend, a good worker etc? Substances may help your symptoms, as you have noticed, but that is escapism, avoidance of the underlying issue. If you avoid it, it is unlikely you will find a solution. Perhaps you need to ask yourself some serious questions. Like, "who am I"? If you don't like who you are, you need to evaluate and mold yourself into your true self, the person you would feel good about being. For me, everyday I try to improve myself into someone I can truly respect, it has been a long journey that will continue the rest of my life.
OP, I'm sure you've heard this cliche many times before, but exercise does wonders. At the same time, not exercising can wreak havoc on your mental state, so if you are not active, or not active enough, I'd recommend a more intense workout regiment. It will up your endorphin release which will directly affect your mood for the better. Furthermore, it would boost your metabolism and provide more energy (mental and physical) to face everything else in life. The Governator was 100% accurate with this: As far as the people in your life go, If you are struggling with your mental state, and not finding any strength and support from them while dealing with it, then perhaps consider getting yourself into an environment that is more friendly to your sanity, whatever that may be for you. Good Luck!
No easy answer for this, but one thing that sticks out is that you place a lot of value on other people's opinion on you. Everyone goes through a lot of shit and many are quick to judge while they themselves are fucked up. Just take it as a grain of salt and at most just take it as feed back that you simply just have room to improve. Find a hobby that requires no one but yourself, such as weightlifting to get your mind off this , plus it's healthy and will be great for your mood. On the other hand, find a hobby that exposes you to other people. Use Meetups and meet up with a group of people that have a similar interest. Maybe you will find someone that clicks with you and you don't have to be depressed alone and have someone you give you moral support Meditate and explore your mind to find ways to cope with these negative thoughts and view it from a different perspective. Other people's thoughts of your do not define you and neither does your own thoughts. They are merely just thoughts.
Much of depression, IMO...is based in perspective. It seems to me that your perspective is stale. Jayfoxpox is giving solid advice. Check your diet. Try to get out (I know this can be hard but push through and make yourself get the fuck out there)....walk...run....hike in the woods....sit by the stream...etc. Beyond all of that....my advice is to volunteer somewhere like a homeless shelter or food kitchen/etc. Seeing others having a far harder time having basic needs met may give you the perspective you need on many fronts. SOMEONE needs you buddy....as much as you need them. Find those people....and the people who are helping them. I assure you that those folks care.....about you....about others....about righting folks lives. You don't have to be homeless to feel it....but you do have to be present and engaged. You HAVE WORTH.....you just haven't found the path. I lost my oldest boy 6+ years ago and it sent me into a similar place. While there I met many other parents who had also lost...some with FAR MORE loss than I....parents who didn't know where their loved one's body was...only that he must be dead....parents who had lost THREE children...parents who were at the wheel when their child died. From that place....weird as it was/HARD AS IT WAS....I found PERSPECTIVE....... and that perspective is that no matter how bad YOU feel...someone else out there has it worse... if you find those folks I believe you will find yourself and the perspectives you need to come out of the fog.
woe is me the problems you face in your life are present in the life of every individual you have ever met, ever will met, and will not meet. they wont be the exact same problems you have but everyone in the world suffers here is the secret: whenever you think you will forever feel happy you think that the happiness will last forever, when you are sad you think this sadness will never leave, when you are depressed you think that this is a constant in life. you are choosing the path you are taking, others can influence you but there are so many available courses of actions that can prevent certain behavior, knowledge about psychology itself can let you in on a few secrets to trick your brain into feeling confident and such... it sounds so simple, and it is. your perception reflects your reality
I'm closely quoting this from an article I've read: Napoleon seems to have been depressed as a teen, wondering how to advance in the military when it was run by incompetent french nobility, and no corsicans seemed to gain the chance to advance. Nevermind where he ended up, look at what he accomplished. People claim there's a connection between leadership and depression. Ur either a Napoleon or ur that guy that's gonna be a never-was type of dude, never having accomplished shit. Listen, I'm depressed as fuck but there are tons of great men/women that went through depression and overcame it to become legends. Living in this world is shit but we all gotta find a way to become legends. Legends in your own way. Follow ur path, don't give up and don't regret failing cause tons of legends have failed.
I,m 53 and just found weed 14 months ago,,and had bipoler for more years than can remember,,BIG ROUND ABOUT OFF MOOD SWINGS,,,But no over the last 14 months or smoking and PLUS have a mad intrest in the hole thing,,from seed to amazing smoke,,UR WORDS MY MATE RING HOME SO MUCH TRUTH,,THANKS,S.
I use to be the same way daily. tried everything alcohol, sex, marriage, kids, a dog, different jobs, schooling, counseling, hard drugs, affairs, expensive possessions u name it in the end the only thing that made me happy was my kids. I personally think weed, diet, exercise, a good sleep schedule and a low stress environment gives you an opportunity to self reflect and figure out why we do the things we do and the emotions that drive those actions. Granted that type of environment these days is rare but if you can sacrifice and do your best to create it, it really does pay off. I don’t know where your from but what I do when I need to clear my head usually 1x a year is go camping by myself small tent, fire making supplies, food, weed, lawn chair, pen, and paper. I don’t go to popular places either I go deep into the woods near water away from everyone. No tv, computer, phone, work, or family. Go spend a week with just u try to figure out why ya feel the way ya do. When life is shit it’s hard to find joy in anything. Nothing will change until u figure out why these feelings take over at that point u can learn to recognize and control it. I use to b down for months or years now it’s only a week or two at a time before I bounce back. MY SOUND TRACK Down in a hole, nutshell, and would are all good tracks
I agree with cbdburner, bug out for a few days, nothing like being left to your own thoughts without any external input to shape them for you! Master yourself, master your destiny! Sent from my Moto E (4) Plus using Tapatalk
Your best bet is to talk to a professional and get some therapy to see where this imbalance stems from. Talking to someone helps a lot Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum
Great advice my friend In the end I guess depression is the easy and pussy way out of life really, yah it exists it hurts but it’s finding the strength and kicking yourself in the ass to get out of it and pick yourself up off The ground and keep going
I had awful depression for years and still have bad days sometimes, what has helped me the most is getting messed up as often as possible and just focus on having fun and blow off your responsibilities and superficial crap. Just follow your bliss man, peace and love. Sent from my Z717VL using Grasscity Forum mobile app
Like others have suggested, I would also recommend exercise and sunlight. Lifting weights is a great outlet There are a few things to look at that may help you: -what time do you go to bed and get up -how much time do you spend in front of screens or sitting down VS being more active -what you eat