Ok sorry for the super long post, I am pretty stoned but this is super important to me so If you can put up with it please read. I have to give you a background recap to make sense of the importance of this to me, so here is a "not so quick" background on my situation: I am seperated from my wives (I was Polyamorous and had two wives) and three children. I got to a very dark place afterwards and got suicidal. I came from a background of gang type activity and very negative and aggressive vibes. At first I was just careless and had a "no will to live situation" where I wouldn't do anything personally but I would run 110 on my motorcycle with no helmet, or quick to pull a pistol and use it...eventually however I was sitting in my bedroom with one of my pistols to my chin. I didn't do anything, instead I walked away from my life. Deleted facebook, literally walked out of my house and left my house with everything I owned, my motorcycle and all my friends. I kept my Colors, but I didn't talk to ANYONE. I went to the beach, surfed and smoked. then I left. Bought a van and traveled. I've been around the country and done cool shit, lived in the van or in the woods, living off of nothing. I have lost a lot of weight and gained a lot of perspective. This "walkabout" changed my life. I am literally a different person, more positive and happy in all aspects but my kids. I was incomplete without them. Then the craziest thing happened...shit went south. I came back to Florida from Colorado to get my kids for Christmas. Then I find out the wives are planning on moving out to Missouri, but will let my two biological kids, move with me full time. This is the best news I had ever heard, then my van broke down, I lost the job I had, I was homeless with no house (van) and for some fucked up reason, the ex wife says I can have the kids but does EVERYTHING possible to make me seem bad and evil and incapable of being a single parent. So now I'm in Florida, staying at my Father's while trying to get everything ready in less than 4 months. (house, new car, job, etc) to get my kids. I found a job, but that's it. I have a lot of money I need to raise in a short period of time. The last two days had been really bad and one of those "everything goes wrong" situations from work to baby mama drama to just stupid little fuck ups all day to stress you out. Which brings us to now: Sent from my SWISHER-WR-G420A using Applebee's two for one app
So my little sister got me a gift of beard beads that is a set of Nordic Runes. I am a Heathen and Asatru, meaning I follow the Old Norse Gods. I'm scientific enough to know how lightning works and there's not the literal representation of the faith, however I find wisdom and guidance in the faith. anyways I wore three random beads today at work, had a horrible day, came back and got high. when I was going to take them off I thought that much like casting stones, or drawing rune cards, I chose these at random. what would happen if I read them as a casting? Now usually you have a question in your mind when you draw, however these were random and I didn't have a question in mind just the overbearing anxiety and depression on how I'm gonna pull this off and get my kids... this is what I found in my Rune book using my beads as a reading. Sent from my SWISHER-WR-G420A using Applebee's two for one app
I then decided to do another spread using my cards, the "right" way and using a Cycle of Initiation which is a cycle of life and at what point you are in. it's presented in the form of PAST (What lead you to this point ) PRESENT (Current situation) FUTURE (What is expected) I drew these: Sent from my SWISHER-WR-G420A using Applebee's two for one app
Where I am and what I'm presented with Sent from my SWISHER-WR-G420A using Applebee's two for one app
Ok, I'm done. sorry for the mass posting. But if you believe, use, or know anything about Tarot or Runes or anything of the like. Please give me your opinion, other opinions are also encouraged. But is this just me really stoned, or does it seem like maybe I'm just changing and all I'm worried about is just part of the change that will lead to a completely different life but with my children? or its all hocus pics nonsense. idk. just entertained me tonight because it seemed to speak to me. Thank you all. Sent from my SWISHER-WR-G420A using Applebee's two for one app