Advice to Northerners moving South

Discussion in 'Grasscity Forum Humor' started by cowboysaxman, May 21, 2002.

  1. ADVICE TO NORTHERNERS MOVING SOUTH

    *Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be instructed
    on how to use it shortly.

    *Just because you can drive on snow and ice does not mean
    Southerners can. Stay home the two days of the year it
    snows.

    *If you do run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four
    men in the cab of a four-wheel pick-up with a 12-pack of
    beer and a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to
    help them. Just stay out of their way. This is what they
    live for.

    *You can ask Southerners for directions, but unless you
    already know the positions of key hills, trees and rocks,
    you're better off trying to find it yourself.

    *Remember: Y'all is singular. All y'all is plural. All
    y'all's is plural possessive.

    *Get used to hearing, "You ain't from around here, are you?"

    *Don't be worried that you don't understand anyone. They
    don't understand you, either.

    *The first Southern expression to creep into a transplanted
    Northerner's vocabulary is the adjective "big ol", as in
    "big ol truck", or "big ol boy". "Fixin'", as in "I'm fixin'
    to go to the store", is 2nd. And "Y'all" is 3rd.

    I hope ya'll are fixin' to have a big ole' laugh!! :D:
     
  2. Cowboy, ain't you from California? That's one of them Yankee states....
     
  3. Yup! So who better to give advice to Yankees then a "Born-again Rebel" ??? LOL, And I have Historical "roots" here in LA. and in East Texas.Have lots of relatives buried in Confederate graveyards through out the South.

    Yankee by birth (Oregon), Southern by choice!! Save your Dixie cups, the South will rise again!!! :D: :D: :smoking:
     
  4. OK I get it. You are one of them "Damn Yankees", i.e. a yankee who moves down south and lives heer forever now. Well at least you don't talk about how much better it is back home in yankeeland than it is here in Dixie. LOL

    Glad to have you in the South old buddy!!!
     
  5. Yup!
    Nope!
    Thanks!
    LMAO! :D: :D:

    Here's one JUST for BPP,lol !


    An Alabama Farmer was headed into town for some supplies. As he reached a bridge, he saw a man standing on the rail fixin' to jump!! He got out of his truck and yelled at the man, "Hey Buddy, don't jump,Think of your Family!!". The man replied, "I don't have ANY Family left alive!!". The Farmer said, "Think about God!!". The man said, "I've been a life-long Atheist!" The Farmer said, "Think of the Honor of Robert E. Lee, and Southern Gentlemen!". The man said, "Who??" The Farmer said, "Jump, Damn Yankee, jump!!!" :D: :D:
     
  6. Roll Tide!!!!!!!!!!!!

    LMAO!!!!!
     

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