I don't usually write hip hop. I play guitar and thats really my forte, but some dumb comments on facebook earlier pissed me off so I wrote this. The track was meant to be played with the link as a backing track. Feedback welcome EDIT: I bought a mic today and went ahead and recorded lyrics for it. I don't freestyle or spit lyrics often, so enjoy it for what it is [ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rknqab2dXpg"]YouTube- Revolutionary Vengeance[/ame] All I hear from kids today about the political state is how democrats did this and the republicans hate stupid kids who think they've seen the entire political spectrum unaware how misinformed they are about the entire election Now, If Obama was really pushing an agenda of hope Then gays in the military wouldn't have been told nope And Wall street firms wouldn't have a hand in an election process that allowed them to command who's sitting in the stand, like machine of man There's the economy, a victim of sodomy he appointed Geithner, New York born and raised he was the former head of the fed, and some will say he can bring us out of the current predicament. How can that be true? He's the reason we're in it! Inflation spending, wall street thievery, AND NO CURE IN SIGHT IS SURELY A SIGN CORPORATIONS STEALING! And this is appealing? Obama didn't back down from war in Afghanistan he increased attacks from unmanned drones in Pakistan but in his campaign it was withdraw this, no more troops, I ain't a suit, it was all full of shit and that patriot act, of which we all despise was allowed to be renewed, complete without reprieve and Iraq? You thought nobody knew blackwater was back? he moved some troops and replaced them with men who start the attacks! Innocent children, men, and women Whose only fault was being born in Iraq are given the honor of destruction by establishment And here we're saying we hope for government I'm done with it Inside, we tell ourselves that he's here for our benefit he's a trust worthy politician, no more degenerates but really his agenda is more of the same, disregarding his skin color, makes him even more plain Disdain is the highest form of patriotism, When the government screws you, use the freedoms that you're given. And if they push back, attack, freedom spreading benevolence take the red pill, revolutionary vengeance X2 My problem with Washington isn't its zeal, nor is it with the current dumb mass appeal. its the bankers who lie, steal, incriminate from the American public not discriminate They think we won't notice, that interest can't be paid back by dollars whose base is made up like the attacks, and worse than that the IRS will invade your home, steal your dog, and tap your phone, all for your the tax money, didn't you know? You didn't get the memo? But if you don't believe me, check it out for yourself The facts are there, hidden among the various shelves Connect the dots, from the politicians to the bankers when you find enlightenment, i won't need a thank ya because its our duty to figure it out, what the government's all about so there ain't more doubt, last time i checked, this was the land of the free home of the brave, all you can be, not a vulturous grave, jobs that pave ways, so our children can save, a bright and better day THAT'S THE AMERICAN WAY! Disdain is the highest form of patriotism, When the government screws you, use the freedoms that you're given. And if they push back, attack, freedom spreading benevolence take the red pill, revolutionary vengeance X2
You have a good voice for hip hop and good lyrics bro, I just recomend working on your flow a little bit more because it was a bit choppy but keep it up man you have alot of potential.
pretty good beat where did you get it? also nice lyrics but i agree with the person above in saying that the flow needs to be worked on a little bit. but for someone who just wrote their first rap im impressed.
That was definitely the style that I was going for. He easily is among the top of my list of favorite MC's. His straight to the core truths and no bullshit lyrics are what got me into hip hop. Thanks for the feedback, I've been over-analyzing this piece and you are definitely right. when I wrote this I didn't have a steady 4/4 beat playing in my head, something that I will definitely work on. thanks again i grabbed it off of youtube. I searched Underground Hip Hop Instrumentals and it was one of the first ones that popped up. A simple google search can yield a program that can download youtube videos into Mpeg4 format, and another search can get you a MP3 converter if you are interested in downloading AWESOME intrumentals. thanks man I appreciate it
Good mic presence, which is really hard to learn, but you got good delivery. Rhymes were okay. Work on multis change up your rhyme scheme, work on metaphors and similies, but this all comes with time and practice. You need to find your own style tho. It's okay to borrow from Immortal Tech, but you don't want to steal his style. Lyrics were good and had relevance, and your actually sayin something which is good. You sounded wound up and a little tense and stiff on the mic, which is natural just need to practice. Overall not bad, next thing you need to do is get in the cypher. You will learn so much from a few minutes in the cyph. Keep doin what you do. One love Edit: Also try to stay away from dramatic songs when starting out, it's really hard to pull off.
