Worst night ever.

I didn't even sleep last night. I went to some guys birthday party in my class at a bar. The girl I like who is not in law school was also invited because her roommate is a law student and she goes with her and knows a few people in my class.

so the night before she is fb messaging me joking with me. this is the same girl i've liked for 6 months and she told me she like another guy in another city but I slept with her and she also lead me on by telling me she has feelings for me too.

that is not the point though..... she was like hardcore ignoring me. I did go and dance with some other girls and try and talk to them. she was all over a guy in my class that knows I like her. she was like grabbing her hand and taking him to a corner and yeah she probably went home with him.


now this wasn't really my fault this fukn girl is in my social circle now and even comes to law school parties.

only way to avoid her would be to not go to any parties and isolate myself.


school is done in 6 weeks for summer and i'll be gone for 4 months which is awesome.


but seeing her talk to me the night before and then ignore me and all over a guy in my class was fuked.

I felt so sick I had to leave and go home. I have also something at her house that I need to get so I will have to see her again.

It's just fukn painful and i'm trying to ignore the pain and focus on my exams as I only have 6 weeks left.


I just feel like she's fukn evil now.

 

i think for the next 6 weeks i'm going to make sure to avoid her even if it means not going to my class parties. I don't want to ever see her again after last night

shit fukn hurts I wish she would just disappear and i'd never see her again fuk.

 

yah but I got the worst feeling in the world. it's that feeling you get in your stomach like you feel like you have been stabbed and want to puke our guts out.

it fukn hurts when you see the girl that you like and would talk to you all night, kiss you, sleep with you, cuddle with you etc, ignoring you and going off with another guy right in front of you.


like i said I didn't sleep last night, and still haven't slept. i'm going to go out and try doing schoolwork today. but i'm in fukn pain.


I still have to get keys i left at her house.

 

yeah girlyS I know, i'm fucking weak it sucks. and yeah I txted her roomate to bring my keys sometime today but seh hasn't responded yet, she is probably passed out still.


but yeah I know i put myself here but the pain sucks. nothing can numb this pain. I couldn't even fucking sleep.

I just can't believe how cold she was. after I spent hours and hours talking to her until she fell asleep her telling me she has feelings for me. why would she do this in front of me??

now I feel like she's a monster. it's funny because when she would talk to me all night she acted all sweet and innocent and she kept on telling me she cares about me.

I honestly don't know if i can ever trust a girl again.

 

and i'm not making excuses about seeing her again. if I want to avoid seeing her i'd have to not go to the birthday parties or law parties my classmates have every once in a while. she knows some of them and gets invited on fb and she knows a guy in my class and now the other guy in my class she was all over last night. they'll invite her

i'd have to not go out to these events.

it's true they are not every week and I can try making friends with other people and not going to where she goes.


she will be at my university until next april.

but thank god in 6 weeks school is dune well april 19, and i'll go back to my city and I definately wouldn't bump into her all summer.

i'm just looking forward to that. I want to get past this nightmare.

 

I doubt she'll call or contact me anyways after this. she was all over this guy in front of me.


but who knows she might later on when she feels lonely contact me.


do you honestly think she is not a typical girl and is just a whore or whatever?

I honestly don't know. I don't have that much experience with girls. we are not dating. I just know it was wrong of her to talk to me all night and tell me things like she liked kissing me or she has some feelings for me and sleep with me and then shove it in my face that she likes another guy and now this

and yeah apparently talk shit behind my back to everyone and tell them that she's all innocent and i'm just in love with her and don't get it.

 

after this I honestly don't want to pursue another girl. I feel like they'll just use me and stab me and walk all over my feelings.