Alright so heres the deal. I liked this girl for about a year, and she was dating this guy who she was unhappy with but did not want to leave. She said she came very close to leaving him for me. So I finally get over it and a few nights ago we hung out and I found out some interesting things. She got over him when they broke up for two weeks, she agrees he treats her like shit. I asked her to list the top 5 people she is interested in and im number 1 and her current bf is number 5. So I am confused as to why she is still with this guy, and another thing, the reason she won't date me is because she feels like ill treat her "too good". But we think that because her normal way of getting treated is horrible and she thinks getting treated as a "princess" or "too good" would be the normal way of treating someone.....any ideas on why she is this way? Sorry for the ramble, we just can't figure this one out and just wondering what anyone thinks. also, if your gonna leave an ass comment, please refrain. thnX!
Without knowing either of them, there could be several reasons. She has low self-esteem and believes she deserves it. She might have had a family life where this kind of relationship is "normal" and doesn't know how to deal with any other kind. She might be afraid to leave him and is too afraid to tell you the truth. She might also be just not that into you and she's letting you off easy.
this is a girl that wouldn't let me off "easy" especially cuz she knows that i got over her and i did not say i liked her at all before she told me all this shit the other night. The family thing, who knows. And she knows she should leave the current relationship, due to the fact that EVERYONE she knows tell her she should leave him, including her best friend. I dunno I think im done = \.
My friend Holly had an ex like that (horribly abusive and an all-around jerk) but she wouldn't leave him for three years. I still haven't gotten a straight answer out of her as to why.
Dude same shit is happening to me. This girl is the only girl I've ever cared for in my life and she asked me what would happen if she broke up with her bf. But even though she know I like her and she likes me she won't break up with him. I don't know what to tell you but I hope it'll work in both of our favors.
If shes really stupid, and stays with that guy she doesnt even care for, i recommend "shake a bitch", done by firmly grasping both shoulders and rocking back and forth really fast.
same thing happened to me ........... in grade 8 ........ but it was good cuz a couple of years ago .... (gr 9-10) i did whateva i waned with that girl but the fact is she was fucked up cuz she didnt wanna actually "GO OUT" with me .. but we fooled around a lot and i was good wid that .....
okay first of all i am drunk now... But this girl is different shes that girl that no one notices in high school but is incredibly hot. We work so good together its sad. Honestly i would give up almost anything to spend 1 hour with her....= \
Mmmmmaybe, she scared. That if she leaves him, to go to you, that things won't work you- or you won't take her. And maybe she sees security in this guy. Maybe she wants to date him to see what it's like. Or maybe she can't break up with him, as being too scared to hurt him. (Sorry, my gender barely helps with situations like this..cuz it's hard for even me to understand how girls think)
Theres always the possibility that this dude could be abusive to her and she might be nervous to leave him...you should tell her that if he pulls any tricky shit you got her back and a whole team of kids to set em straight if shit ever did pop off
I think every guy has had this problem, lol. We don't know y. I think they like to get treated like shit? IDk. Had this problem recently. The thing is I'm friends with both of them so it's even worse, lol. Pretty much one of my best friends is dating her and I've tried to break them up. Problem is I think we don't try hard enough or at least me. I think girls would leave I think they just want to be swept of their feet by a fucking knight in shining armor like in the movies.
Geez...what a fucking mess. No wonder you closed it. I cleaned up all of the bullshit so that the thread could continue.
Perfekt, I don't have an answer to the question you asked, but I am going to say some things that may or may not make you very happy. Hempress's bullets give some insight into the situation but also she could just be lying to you about where you fall in the stack. When I was young I did similar things. I can't remember ever telling someone I would like to date them, but I have kept male friends even though I knew I would never be with them (and knew they were interested in me). I think it is an extreme form of immaturity. Granted other things may help keep that immature perspective strong, but that is what it is. I can't for the life of me understand why I remained in a horrible relationship with a total fuckwit for 3 years. He was a horrible person to me and I allowed it. I didn't believe I was worthless but all the men that were in my life that wanted me, thought I was an amazing person, or just have really positive outlook on me; were in my life for just those reasons. I could continue my shitty relationship and live vicariously through the male friends I had. I didn't have to worry about the breakup fallout. Who in our group of friends will still be my friend? Even though I hate his fucking guts, I am going to feel depressed about being alone? Even though he is a pig, I am going to feel like a douche when I see him with other girls. (not because I am in love, but because I do love him) Am I going to feel even more crappy without him? -- No I do not think these are rational thoughts but they are real. What do I suggest? Stop enabling her to be with this shitface. Make her deal with her own shitty realationship with this guy without you and your compliments. Stop treating her like she walks on water. Treat her as though she were someone you didn't want to date but want as a friend. No tender compliments, no opening the door for her... It sounds like she is coming to you for an ego fix. Don't give it to her. She will grow up one day. I did. haha well kinda. My relationship maturity turned around when I was around 24. I stopped acting like an idoit, was honest with interested parties, and had a few very fulfilling realtionships before I married the very best person in the world. But I'll never stop laughing at ass, poop or fart jokes - so kill me. These are just my opinions, do with them what you will.
meh, its a lot more complicated then everyone knows so = \. But thanks to all the people who tried to help. I didnt get to see all the deleted posts, but if they were bad enough to be cleaned up then....wow, anyway, thanks!