When Your Kid Smokes Pot

Discussion in 'Marijuana News' started by oltex, Aug 13, 2010.

  1. #1 oltex, Aug 13, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 13, 2010
    When Your Kid Smokes Pot

    August 8, 2010 / Paul Elam\t\t\t

    \t\t O.K., so you found some weed in your teen-agers room.

    Depending on the kind of parent you are, your reaction to that can range from mild amusement to thermonuclear. But assuming you are not going to smoke the stuff yourself, you are confronted with making some decisions on what to do about it. Perhaps you think it is time to call a counselor, or maybe even the thought of a treatment center for young people with drug problems crosses your mind.

    As someone who worked in the chemical dependency treatment field for two decades, and who wrote and directed several treatment programs, let me make a suggestion about that. Don’t. Don’t even think about it.

    To clarify, let me tell you some things you won’t hear from the staff at treatment programs, or anyone else interested in making a buck off your child’s “problem.”

    First, there‘s this funny thing about teenage drug addicts. There aren’t any. Or at least they are so far and few between that I can count the ones I have seen on two fingers. So for your benefit, an understanding of addiction is in order.

    We’ll view it in simple, objective terms. Chemical dependency and/or abuse is defined, in that Holy of Holies, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM IV), in pretty explicit terms, regardless of what drug we are talking about. There are two main criteria.

    First, for physical addiction to be established there has to be the presence of physical withdrawal symptoms when the drug use is stopped. My money is on the fact that if you take your kids pot away they won’t even get so much as the sniffles. This probably has something to do with the fact that marijuana isn’t addictive.

    The other diagnostic criteria, and the one the treatment centers rely heavily on as their cash cow, is the continued use of a particular drug or drugs despite the onset of severe life damaging consequences. In this we are talking about things like multiple arrests, lost jobs, physical ailments and failed marriages, all related to the use/abuse of drugs. Again, the odds are good that Johnny didn’t lose his paper route or burger flipping position from smoking some weed, or suffer any of these other complications.

    And as much as Johnny, or even you, may protest, getting caught by your parents isn’t severe and life damaging- unless there is something really wrong with the parents.
    So why then, you might ask, are there treatment programs spread across the entire western world that will gladly take Johnny in and “treat” him as long as the money or insurance holds out? Well, money, of course. There’s gold in the ignorance of them thar parents.

    And in their fear and desperation- and in their failure to be good parents.
    But before we get to that, let me illustrate one of the dirty little secrets of the “helping” profession, just to make the point.

    The money is in the diagnosis.
    Up till 1991, there had been something like 6 documented cases of Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD) in the entirety of world history. But then a psychiatrist in Houston, a right smart lady with a really keen eye for those pesky extra personalities, diagnosed enough of them in that city to keep a 22 bed unit at a psychiatric hospital full of them for months on end.

    At around $1,200 a day per head, for stays that often ranged in the months, MPD was a gold mine. The Doc was getting rich, hospital administration was ecstatic and the insurance companies continued to pay.

    Eventually the authorities took notice; Lady Freud was figured to be Lady Fraud and was charged with scamming the insurance companies. That hospital’s administrator lost his job. Later though, the charges were dropped, mainly because the burden was on the prosecution to prove that the patients, whose confidentiality -and thus treatment information- was protected by law, didn’t have MPD. Case closed, and the lady walks with the money, perhaps to go on and treat teenage drug addicts.

    The point here is, though, if one psychiatrist can find hundreds of MPD’s, mostly from the same city, all with insurance to cover the stay, how hard do you think it is to find teenage drug addicts?

    That’s right. They are as close as the nearest scared and insured or affluent parent.
    And the corruption is just the light side; surface stuff. We are, after all, talking about your child.

    Who cares if it is expensive, right?
    I would tend to agree if locking your child away in a treatment program and calling them an addict would somehow resolve their problems. It would be worth the expense. But the truth is that it is more likely to make things worse.

    It reminds me of a joke. Mom and Dad find Johnny’s stash of pot and take him to the treatment center. Dad is concerned, mom is crying and Johnny looks scared out of his mind.

    The counselor asks, “Johnny, do you know why you are here?”
    “Yes,” Johnny says, voice trembling, “I was smoking pot.”
    Just then another couple walks in with their son, also named Johnny. Dad is angry and reeks of gin, Mom is crying so hard she can hardly open her bottle of Xanax.
    The dad says, “We were just on our way out of town when we had to come here. Can you fix the little bastard? We’ll pick him up when we get back. A month O.K.?”
    The counselor turns to the other Johnny and asks again, “Johnny, do you know why you are here?” “F*ck you, bitch,” says the boy.

    “Isn’t this great!” says the counselor. “Johnny, meet Johnny. You can both share the experience of treatment together. Perhaps we’ll make you room mates!” And yes, that is the punch line.

    Adolescent drug abuse programs, more than any others, become dumping grounds for all manner of problems, except real chemical dependency. If you take your kid there because you caught them smoking pot, they will be tossed in with a population of conduct disorders, budding sociopaths, even the occasional emerging psychopath.
    Of course they will all have that evil pot use in common, if nothing else.

    Treatment programs need customers in order to make money. And as we learned in our MPD program, they are often not too picky about how they get those customers, as long as the money is there.
    Johnny and Johnny won’t be the exception.

    In fact, in all the years I worked in that field, I never saw anyone turned away who wanted to be admitted (or whose parents wanted it), unless there was no funding. Those that didn’t want to check in were always encouraged to change their minds in the strongest possible terms.

    Plenty of the great unwashed were sent packing no matter how bad their circumstances. The standard for the business was, and is, if you’ve got coverage, you’ve got a problem we can help you with.

    What do you suppose happens when you mix these types of personalities together and concentrate them behind locked doors with their lives under the control of external authority figures while the rest of their family enjoys freedom?

    Johnny One and Johnny Two might not have much in common when they are admitted, but you can bet they will become fast friends during their stay together. It’s what happens when you create a penitentiary environment. And what your relatively innocent kid doesn’t know about drugs, sex and a host of other things before treatment, he will quickly learn during the process. All this and there is not one bit of reputable evidence to suggest that treatment will stop him from doing drugs in the future.

    So what, then, is a concerned parent to do?
    I am afraid the answer to that one is almost as unpalatable as treatment itself.

    There is one other bit of information that you won’t hear from professionals who are financially invested in keeping the cash flow coming. 99 out of 100 screwed up kids come from screwed up homes- screwed up parents. In fact, if you get someone who works in a treatment setting with adolescents to tell you the truth, they will tell you that the greatest frustration with their work is that they spend all this time trying to help kids with their problems, only to send them right back to the same dysfunctional environment -the environment that caused their problems- when treatment is done.

    Of all the adolescents I worked with (and quit working with because of this problem) they had more in common with bad parents than with drug use. It was a virtual broken record of the same old same old; parents that were outraged because their kids turned to drugs, but couldn’t tell you the name of any of their teachers at school. Often there was violence and abuse in the home that the parents wanted to call “discipline,” or active real addiction by one or both parents. They often had Dads that didn’t know they were alive unless they were in trouble, and Moms that had turned them into little emotional spouses because they had run off the fathers affections long ago. But that joint in the bottom drawer? Something had to be done!

    And these parents, afflicted by those or a myriad of other problems, all had something in common as well. Their kid was the problem. Their kid was the only problem. And you could see it in the vacant, glazed over look in their eyes any time you tried to talk about anything else.

    But what else can a treatment provider do? You push the truth too hard and the parents (read money) goes bye-bye.

    And so the dance of lies picks up tempo; and the music drowns out every relevant reality that might actually help these struggling people. The kid, in many cases, is often the most sane person in the home. More than likely, they are acting out and calling attention to the problems that Mom and Dad are pretending didn’t exist; screaming at them for help in the only way they know how. And their reward for this service is to be locked up and stigmatized in order to get at their parents money.

    Or, heaven forbid, some of them are just a normal kids experimenting with some pot. It happens you know, and more than a few of them go on to become happy, well adjusted adults who happen to like marijuana.

    But for the ones that are real problems; the really troubled kids, parents can likely find the best solution in the mirror. Your child didn’t get to where they are in a vacuum. And your money or insurance cannot help them near as much as your love, ongoing involvement in their lives, and willingness to clean up your own act.

    There is clearly some cases where some short term counseling might help with that. When kids are in trouble, good parents can often figure it out by figuring out what is wrong with themselves.

    So do yourself and your child a favor, go there without them first. Or better yet, just take a good long look at yourselves before you talk to anyone else.

    It’s amazing what that can do.
  2. Wow, I am amazed :]
    A friend of mine's mom sent her kid to Shodair (it's a childrens hospital for suicidal and emotionally/mentally disturbed children) for smoking weed at a party, I wish I had read this sooner so I could give it to her (fucking over the top jesus freaks)

    If I had a kid that blazed, I'd have them do it only in the house, and would tax them cause, who doesn't like free (taxed) weed?
  3. thats crazy about the childrens hospital man. i cant see why people are still stuck in a reefer madness mindset
  4. i have been to 3 treatment centers from age 15 1/2 to 17 1/2. for smoking pot. This thread really speaks to me and brought back a lot of unhappy memories.

    Before I was sent away (picked up at 2 a.m. mind you, while blacked out. didnt remember being picked up, just woke up on the plane with 2 cops) I had finally started to gain control of my anxiety and depression. I was never suicidal mind you, till treatment.I could feel myself changing for the better while at home. But of course life doesnt work that way. Im sick and the only thing that will get me better is antidepressants and critisism.

    Now a year and a half later and $110,000 lost, im worse of than ever. Thanks for posting this, ima show it to the rents tomorrow. sorry for the rant but it brought back a lot of bad thoughts.
  5. #5 Mr Stoned, Aug 13, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 13, 2010
    He has a lot of good points. Weed users should not be admitted to rehabilitation programmes because the 'addiction' is all in the mind. Having said that, I know countless people who have smoked every day for years (including myself) despite the fact it is obviously holding them back from really achieving their potentiality as a person, does that not at least qualifiy as something more than a habit? Weed is the most psychologically addictive drug I have come across. I found things like ecstacy, mephedrone, coke, shrooms to be much less addictive even though the feeling those drugs provided was much better than any given by weed. Though I suppose that stems from the reasoning that those kind of drugs are truly destructive, whereas all the negative effects of weed (and yes there are many with long term heavy usage) are balanced out by the positive ones, and the herb does not often have a catastrophic impact on ones life.

    However, weed is still extremely psychologically addictive and I don't understand why people are convinced that a physical addiction is much worse than a psychological one. The mind has complete power over the body and when one becomes depressed, irritable, anxious, restless etc from cessation of use, then how does that not qualify as an addictive substance? After a week or so without weed I feel like I'm literally going crazy and that feeling is NOT nice. I'd much rather feel physically shit than take a psychological battering.

    People need to be more open minded about weed here. It's a brilliant drug, but it's still a drug. Abusing any drug daily is not good for the body (and yes that included caffeine and nicotine before people bring them up.)

    Well written article though, good points.
  6. #6 06cbrboy, Aug 13, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 13, 2010

    Yeah psychologically addictive hmmm ive been smoking for 10 years in those ten years ive quit twice once for a few months another for a year. Its all how you handle yourself you cant be a fucking peter and whaaa i dont have/cant find any weed. Try being a broke pot head if that were the case i guess u would go reeffer maddness CRAZY lol. this post is a joke. the person who started the thread is as right as it gets. I love my mj but if i dont have funds or just cant find, i feel anxious for about a second then im like ok i live 16yrs without it i can go a DAMN DAY or week what ever it turns out to be without it damn. Get a grip and tell yourself its ok. cuz it is. Try being a real addict. Ive had a monkey on my Back thanks to the docs. 12 Norcs a day is a problem an oz a day is not!!!! I never shit myself or felt like my skin was crawling when out of weed. Nor have I had wd's from weed that last 5-7 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!! like opiates will do. No one should ever say weed is addictive its a joke addiction in the physical sense is so much worse and no matter if ya tell your self ya dont need it youve rewired your brain too late its always gonna try n tell ya gimmie that pill! Trust me Ive over came this problem not that i dont fall down sometimes but i pick myself back up quickly and move on. Weed i just say ohh todays not gonna be as fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:smoke: weed is a drug last time i checked it was a unprocessed plant material/Herbal yes it has drug like affects but it is a naturally occuring "drug" dont even like to type that oxy xanax opium xtc hell K2 shit they are all drugs man wether legal or illegal. and K2 and shit like it damn thats the kind of shit id really be worried about who knows whats in it, and what the long term affects are. I know a girl who treated a patient at a hospital she worked at who couldnt quit seizing due to k2. The kid was never the same. never heard of weed have this affect hmmmmm ppl lets open our eyes and minds pls!!!
  7. I can relate to the article especially the words about the parents. My mother is emotionally unstable and drugged up with xanax, lithium and a myriad of other prescription drugs that "help her" and my father was completely emotionally unavailable and didn't know I was breathing unless I did something completely unforgivable I.E. one time as a teenager, I used a glass that I wasn't supposed to (it was a plain clear drinking glass of absolutely no value, but he said it was "his" and "only his to use") and was told that I was a complete fuck up.

    I was sent to a "treatment center" not for smoking pot, but for taking 2 of my mother's xanax pills after my father began screaming at me over the fact I didn't finish doing the dishes fast enough (I did not scream back), they told the center that I was "completely hysterical and emotionally disturbed" and they were unable to control me (mind you, after this screaming match and the 2 xanax I was laying on my bed watching a movie and put up no fight with the police when they showed up), they had the staff there handcuff me and I spent 5 days locked in a glass room with only a paper gown and was seen by a psychologist once, for 5 minutes. Being completely isolated with no human contact or stimulation what so ever not even a TV or a book.

    Oh did I mention that they're fine with the pot thing though but still insisted I needed medical help because I took two of my mothers xanax so I could better relax after the fact my father told me I was worthless. PARENTS MUST READ THIS!!!
  8. According to NIDA marijuana is not addictive and they have tested it for 40 years. If they had been able to prove even psychological addiction,you better believe that the ONDCP would be holding it up on a flag staff. According NIDA marijuana causes a dependency.
    A dependency is not being able to function when you get up without coffee or some form of caffeine to get you started.
    And marijuana did not "hold you back" from accomplishing anything,although the stigma
    and criminal record from being arrested with it will. Do you think marijuana holds back the thousands of professional athletes and Olympic gold medal winners that use it. Did it hold Obama or numerous other politicians back?
    In a recent argument with a farmer in my hometown it took me two hours to convince him that the marijuana his grandson got caught with did not damage the boy as much as the $750 fine that grandpa had to pay did,and that instead of being angry with marijuana for costing him $750,be mad at the legislators and bureaucrats in DC that want to continue doing this to people.
  9. haha hahah Little Johny two shoes:laughing:

    "So do yourself and your child a favor, go there without them first. Or better yet, just take a good long look at yourselves before you talk to anyone else."

    HAD To Quote for the truth:hello:
  10. I'd smoke it, leave 20 bucks and hope he leaves more.
  11. They cannot 'prove' it is not psychologically addictive or habit forming because people like you instantly dismiss it as propoganda. Whenever a toker finds a study with a positive conclusion on marijuana, they wave it around on a flag pole, yet at the same time dismiss the countless studies that portray it in a negative light.

    As for your argument comparing it to an addicton to opiates? Of course it's not as bad, not by a long shot, but saying the withdrawals of ceassing a heavy weed habit are non existant is absurb. If Anderson Silva punched someone in the face it would hurt a lot worse than if a random lady punched them, yet that blow would still qualify as a punch and would cause some degree of pain.

    And lmfao at the 'thousands of Olympian athletes' comment. Michael Phelps had one picture taken of him hitting a bong when he was drunk and somehow that consistutes as irrefutable evidence that thousands of the worlds greatest athletes smoke weed and all manage to elude the drug tests they regularly have to take. :rolleyes:
  12. If they can't prove it is psychologically addictive and they can't prove it is not
    psychologically addictive,all that leaves us is our opinion.
    I don't remember any comparison with opiates,because there is none.
    The thousands were inclusive of all athletes,and not claiming thousands of Olympic athletes. And yes,thousands of athletes use marijuana and you can refute anything you want but to contend that marijuana "held" you and your friends back is refutable also.
    Or do you think that among the "successful" people of the world,few use maruijuana.
  13. Thanks for this OP, also:

    Anyone who thinks marijuana is addictive in any sense needs to examine their own personal situation. If they think it is physically addictive, they are just crazy, and if they think it is psychologically addictive, they are a pussy.
  14. I mean it held me back as in I can't go for job that drug tests, and a lot of jobs do. And where is your evidence that thousands of athletes regularly use marijuana? Because they really don't. Smoking ANYTHING regularly reduces your lung capacity and why would a pro athlete want? Besides, they get drug tested all the time. How would they pass all their piss tests?

    As for your other argument, coke and crystal meth aren't physically addictive either, yet you wouldn't dispute that they are addictive drugs. If that's the case, then why could one not get psychologically addicted to weed?

  15. Dude, no.


    NBA especially
  16. Do you feel that you could do these jobs in your current state of being if they did not require a drug test? :confused: If yes....

    Then weed is not holding you back, society's attitude toward it is.

    You may find this article interesting.

  17. thats fucking crazy bc i was sent away at the exact same age. the only thing i did was smoke but my parents didnt even bother to ask and sent me to rehab for a "drug addiction" that didnt exist. I went to 2 RTCs and a theraputic boarding school. durring which time my depression got worse and I deveoped a bad eating disorded bc i was scared of gaining weight in treatment. thats maily why I smoke so much now bc i was 5'8 and weighed 100lbs. needless to say if i was a parent ofa teen (im only 18) i would know the whole story and use treatment as a last resort. like if i thought ny kid was in danger of getting hurt or hurting themselves. i agree i needed treatment but not for drugs i had a serious prob w. eating but my parents didnt beleive me...now im sad...tangerine laugh did u go to a wilderness program? it jsut seems like what they do when they pick u up. jw u dont have 2 tell me
  18. Ya I went to a wilderness program in South West Utah for 96 days. I honestly tried making it to 100 days so i could get a "Century Club" badge but I didn't have much of a choice. Then it was off to West Texas for 13 months. There was another one in Provo that i was in for 5 months but i ran away and hopped a train back home. WOOT WOOT!!

    Sorry, I couldn't really get the last question you had but im assuming you asked what they did to me when I was picked up.

    Basically I was "out" *glug glug* (is this fine?) so I can't tell you what happened first hand since i have no recollection of it. From what im told, I didnt put up a fight at all. they (2 cops from Boise escorting part time) carried me to the back seat, went to the airport, got on a plane to Provo and dropped me off in hell. I left out a lot of details but thats the gist of it.
  19. Also, id like to add something that wasnt adressed in the article. It's not related to pot but I feel its still important for people to know or think about.

    Usually these rehabs, treatment centers, whatever you want to call them, have therapy involved in the process. Im sure you guys know the gist of what goes on in therapy (talking about emotions, finding out why you react a certain way, etc). One thing that goes on as well is the uncovering of a dark past, or traumatic experience that can make a person relive emotions and memories that they might not be ready to deal with.

    This is the case with me. I told the people there that I had been sexually abused as a child which I have not done before in my life. I told my rents and reported the guy, but that was it. I never processed the event and am barely starting to now..after $110,000 went into these "treatment" centers. sorry for the ramble but i just dont think putting a group of pissed off, drug addicted teens in a building and expecting them to get along and work out their problems, theraputicly at that, is going to help.
  20. I'd much rather be a pot 'addict' than be hooked on some of these fuckin pills they get people on. A close family member's bi polar and she's on a real cocktail of pharmacutecal devils.

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