What to do...

Discussion in 'Sex, Love & Relationships' started by Capsule Sun, Nov 18, 2011.

  1. So I'm in a bit of a situation.

    I'm an 18 year old dude who recently fucked one of his best friends. We fooled around for about another month or 2, and I got attached. Boyfriend/girlfriend talks proceed. But 1 week she gets a boyfriend(not me), I'm crushed, bla bla bla. 2 weeks later I'm ignoring her to try and get away from the hole that is my heart. Semi succeed but she insists on trying to get a hold of me and see me, sending many unanswered texts and calls, even going through my other friends.

    So one night I'm black out drunk and decide to text her. Wake up in the morning with texts agreeing to meet up with her. Proceed to. She spills her heart out to me, claims to love me, I'm the most trusted dude in her life(sept for daddy), and ends it on the note that "It's not our time yet, I cant risk losing you" and such.

    Thoughts and suggestions on my situation?
  2. Just fuck her and dump her, if she likes you she'll come back


  3. Coming from a woman, I think she may feel like you "are the one" but she just may not be ready to settle down. Let her go. She'll come back.
  4. ^^ I agree. Honestly, it's true. Most relationships at our age (18) don't lead to marriage or anything worth while. She loves you, but doesn't wants to explore relationships with new peopl... but you will always be someone that she comes back to in the end.
  5. Sounds like she meant to say, "I like you but I don't want to date you, I just want to use you for emotional support while I bang other dudes." Play this one tight brother, she's hurt you once, sounds like she's going for round two. If she can't make up her mind, make it for her and gtfo, you don't need a person who plays those bullshit games, either she's in or out.

    If she was one of your best friends, she knows you very well, and if you fooled around, she knows that side of you as well. There's clearly something keeping her from being in a relationship with you, and if you let her string you along for a while its your own fault. I don't buy into that, "its not our time" bullshit, if she loved you like that there would be no doubts or hesitations. It really does sound like she just wants to keep you in the friend zone, but keep that small glimmer of hope so she gets everything she wants: a shoulder to cry on (you), assholes to bang, and a safety net (you again) to fall back on when the assholes are gone.

    I could be way off on this one and she could have very genuine intentions, but that's never how I've seen this one play out...
  6. She just wants to go be a ho
  7. Wow, awesome first post man! lol

    You're 18 so just relax and enjoy yourself. You're not even going to get married for about ten years so it almost certainly won't be to her. Just have fun, get a good education and do stuff you enjoy.
  8. Just roll, never look back.

    She just wants to fuck a bunch of other guys before she settles down with you.
  9. I'm in this situation right now with my ex. Don't fall for it. She just wants to be horny and come back to you when no one wants her.
  10. Update: Told me straight to my face that she wants to "settle down with me", eventually. From the sound of it she's not going to be with her boyfriend much longer, and keeps hinting at making this happen faster. Now I'm not looking to get married right now... but I do want to make her mine for the time being.

    I'll keep ya'll updated, should have some developments in the next month.
  11. don't count of her doing anything she says. do you, and wait for her to come back. it'll happen, but let it happen on her terms. don't force her to break up with the dude she's with. most likely, she's really not that into you but cares about your feelings enough to want to drag you along without saying she isn't in to you.
  12. We all have one of those clingers that wants to "save for a later date". Move on fast, would be my advice. Rarely ever works, and there's always better pussy than the last to be sought.
  13. Everything she's chosen to do has been of her own free will, with a little bit of influence from me. I just stand back and make subtle moves, and like you all said, she comes. Her breaking up with her boyfriend isn't me trying to force her into it but what I pick up from her when she talks about related shit, subtle hints if you will. So until she breaks up with him I'm going to stay back, fool around with other chicks and wait for her to come.

    I could be entirely wrong though. Which is why if by the end of this year I don't have her then I'm probably going to completely distance myself, would be too much stress to handle when school started up again.
  14. lol i will never believe anyone who says they love me but cant be with me right now. im nobody's future plan.

    are you insane? being in love is being committed... and shes telling you she wants to fuck other guys and come back to you when/if all else fails. lol. dump her tell her that's straight up disrespect to your feelings and an insult to the word "love". this girl has no idea of whats shes doing.

    you either are together or are not in love. period.
  15. Well here's the update.

    She's still got the boyfriend and keeps telling me she'll break up with him, soon/eventually. Not the most compelling answers tbh. Everything else is still the same though... still fucking around every time we see each other (3-4 times a week usually), still 100% comfortable with each other, and i still feel like shit. Thinking about ending this very soon unless something changes, can't take much more of this crap.
  16. Take charge, man.

    Tell her its you or him.

    If your annoyed with this situation then change it....
  17. That looks suspiciously like "The Hook" to me. Don't settle for second string.
  18. you guys are still fucking and she has a boyfriend?!

    ugh! get rid of this bitch, if and when you guys get together she is gonna find another guy to play the role that you did while you are with her. and lets say she doesnt do that, how on earth could you trust her when she is cheating on someone with you right now!

    shes trouble
  19. Well here's the end to this story, sorry for the late reply.

    Well lets see, it's been a while. I think I last left off here saying I was gonna try to bend her to my liking or some shit but that never ended up happening. Not the way I wanted at least. I got her to eventually dump her boyfriend, but it took far longer than her word suggested. Mid winter break I think was when it went down.

    Anyway that shit happens and we're still talkin, but all of break she's been acting really cold and distant, probably had some other dude already in her head now that I think about it, and I couldn't pin point why. Any attempts to kiss or touch were pushed aside, sent away with a snap of the wrist in a way. Sex was out of the question, that shit didn't even seem like it could have happened at this point. So a few days before I get ready to head back to college I go and chill with her for the last time before I go back.

    One of the most annoying and depressing times I've had with this bitch. Just went over to her place, sat, smoked, and watched T.V. for hours. Sat on opposite sides of the couch, barely said anything to each other, shit I couldn't think of anything no matter how hard I tried. What once came to mind instantly failed to materialize with the most strenuous effort. Not entirely sure but I think I made a move on her that night as well, but that was shot down. So when I hear other mother fuckers are on there way, bunch of younger dudes she leeches for weed, I decide to bounce. 5 feet out the door fire off a text saying that I was canceling our planned hang out sess the first wednesday of the semester, I've never ever done this before with this girl. That was around January 10. Haven't said a word to her since, although she keeps on texting, even when she gets no replies. Good fucking riddance.

    Life lesson? Wash your hands of filth like this bitch and never look back. Especially when there's so much better shit out there. For example, 1st day of new semester hook up with a girl that in just 2 weeks became my girlfriend. Sex daily, no games, not obsessed with money(offers to pay for my shit and doesn't like it when I try and pay for all hers), beautiful and shit she even took care of my sorry ass when I came down with a nasty virus earlier this week. Real woman.

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