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What happened with my pound... MUST READ

Discussion in 'Apprentice Marijuana Consumption' started by FredTheNunKing, Aug 12, 2011.

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  1. Alright well my original topic got locked cus people kept posting pictures of guns and shit, them fuckers... And people keep telling me to post an update and a new thread on it so I will.

    For those of you who haven't seen it (6000 people have) Here is the link:

    And now I will tell you what happened...

    It was a warm, dark evening in a small California town called Grass Valley when I departed to go pick up my pound. I had trashbags and dryer sheets in my trunk, along with a vacuum-sealable space bag and an empty mail box. It was 11:30 PM When I departed, after getting a call from my dealer to come, and come alone. It was a thirty minute drive, and I was anxious. I started to shake slightly anticipating my first big haul. On the way there I saw three cruisers and I was sketching out that they would pull me over but thankfully they didn't.

    I arrived at my dealer's house (Which I will refer to as Curt from now on) at noon on the dot. I was not afraid that anything would go bad with him because not only has he hooked me up straight for the last few months, but because he was a scrawny, ex meth-head, ginger kid that had never had any real friends and held me dearly as a client. I knocked on the door and was let in by Curt. And that's when it started to become weird.

    I walked in and the first thing I notice is a naked girl sitting on his couch, with her legs spread wide revealing her gaping, hairy vagina. She was fucking herself with a frozen popsicle. I stared at her for a second thinking "What the fucking FUCK?" when Curt turned to me and said "Don't mind her, that's just hamnowgal... She lets me ram her ass for free bud." So I gave him a high five on finally losing his virginity and sat down on his couch.

    He left the room to get the bud while I just sat their... Listening to the deranged moans of hamnowgal as she furiously rammed an Astropop into herself. She kind of sounded like a mix between chewbacca and a dieng chicken. To say the least, it was disturbing. After a few minutes Curt came back with around 25 smaller bags and laid them on his coffee table. He told me to pick out which ones I would like and how much of each. I proceeded to open ever bag and smell and examine the nugs. I felt like a fucking boss.

    After smelling them all I decided to take a QP of four different strains. A indica he called Volcano, some Alaskan thunderfuck, some Gorrilla Grape, and my personal favorite, some snowcap. He left to go get the bigger bags so he could weigh out the bud.

    All of the sudden, out of nowhere, a fucking ninja jumps through the window! Well, he wasn't really the kind of ninja you would expect... He was a midget. A fat one at that, this kid was probably 4'5 and 150 pounds. I couldn't help but laugh when I saw the wooden samurai sword he was struggling to hold up. He said in the most high pitched voice that I've ever heard, sounding gayer then even Justin Bieber himself, "OI! I am mushroomsaggysack! HEAR ME FUCKING ROAR!!!" I couldn't stop laughing. He then made a dart for the table to grab the bags of weed that were laying on top of the table...

    I collected myself and grabbed the closest thing to me, a lamp, and chucked it at him hitting him in his midget dome. He fell to the ground and started screaming at the top of his lung "OM MY GAWDDDD YOU TROLLLL!!!!! I'MA -REP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUUU!!" while simultaneously balling his eyes out. I didn't know what to do.

    Hamwowgal was still sitting on a couch fucking herself and screaming in a full blown orgasm, but now it was with a baseball bat since the popsicle melted. Curt was in the other room, probably distracted with some gay porn, and mushroomsaggysack was laying on the floor screaming and bawling his eyes out like a baby. It was a complete disaster... I was deciding whether I should just leave or stay and pick up my pound when I hear a knock on the door, and see flashing lights outside.

    The door wasn't locked.. Great. The officer was going to come in any minute and see and smell the massive amount of chronic on the table and the demented sight of what was Curt's house.. I needed to get out of there. The officer came in because mushroomsaggysack started screaming "Help!!" And I darted out the door. The officer must have been seriously fucking confused because he didn't immediately come chasing after me until I got in my car. I floored it out of there and was thanking the lord that nobody was following me... Now I just had to get home..

    A few minutes into my drive I hear a fucking helicoptor.. "Not again.." I thought, remembering my last close call when a helicoptor chased me and I instantly felt terrified. My heart dropped thinking I was done for but then I remembered I was probably the least of their problems.. I mean, they did have that thing to deal with, a major pot dealer, and a delusional midget ninja on their hands... And I didn't even have any drugs in my car.. I was safe, unless the cop recognized me that is....

    Well, they didn't. I made it home safely without being pulled over once. And now here I am, telling you about it. That was probably the craziest, most intense and weird thing that I have ever experienced.. But I'm so glad I got out.

    The only thing I'm worried about is Curt snitching on me to the police if he got arrested... He's the kind of douchebag that would do those things just to get his ass out of trouble, but I don't think he has been caught yet. He probably ran away while the cops struggled to get through his boob trapped house, which had slippery semen puddles all around.

    Thanks for reading guys.
  2. #2 GeorgeW Kush, Aug 12, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 12, 2011
    This is all bullshit. Ninjas?? Hamnowgal? Helicopters? Made me laugh though LOL
  3. Sub'd just for the show.
  4. You strike me as kind of a douche.
  5. Why did I read all that? Lol.
  6. Lol this will ensure a ban

    Thanks for the mention, LOL
  7. FredTheNunKing > Poe
  8. Wow that must of have been some weird shit. But you got out of that situation like a G though.

  9. This should be good. I'm grabbing some popcorn right now.
  10. #10 steeeeeeeeez xx, Aug 12, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 12, 2011
    Another troll thread?
  11. I'll read this when Im high, sounds like a entertaining story.
  12. tlt;dr

    too long troll; didn't read
  13. Awesome. Can we hear more about Hamwowgal plz? Was it a wooden bat?...cuz that'd be sweet.
  14. Alright,

    You know that these piss everyone off, youve been flamed beyond belief, and you continue to do this shit. May the mighty ban hammer strike strongly and swiftly.
  15. Heaven forbid you get some entertainment.
  16. To anyone who doesn't know ... he is a troll, posted about how he was getting a pound. Everyone mentioned (i am curt... how clever) is a little attempt at being funny and including us in a made up story.

    Anyone that buys into it below my post should feel ashamed.

    If you guys are ready for this disease of leave, report the thread by clicking the red exclamation point in the top right of his post.

  17. Everyone that stuck up for him last time feels real stupid now. This isn't entertainment, its continued trolling.
  18. Please don't close this thread, I need to be entertained damn it!
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