You're a booty call, dude. Either live with it or cut her loose because from what you've posted so far, I don't see it getting better.
it seems like you want have a relationship with a girl who will actually consider herself your girlfriend, and will stay true to you and only you, and treat you the way you deserve to be treated. (like you know a normal functioning relationship) and what it seems like from your posts is that, this chick has not and has not intentions of ever being the girl your really looking for. i feel like if you stay with her it is because you are expecting her to change eventually and become what your looking for, but the truth is that probably isn't going to happen. she is going to continue fucking with your emotions and using you for sex and whatever other shitty stuff she is doing to you the girl treats you like crap, dude. find a girl who treats you right also, it seems like your putting this girl's emotions first in your life which isn't right! especially because it seems like she doesn't give two shits about your emotions
wow long story there. Didn't read the whole thing but seriously this girl doesn't want to be with you while you're just being caught in the middle and trying to figure something out. If I were you I'd get out of her life and just part different ways. No harm there shit goes on.
Dude just leave it alone. Its not working and you are smothering her. It seems pretty clear that she's not trying to be with you. Just leave it...