weed + vodka +driving = handcuffs

all of the events are in this story are all true


so i went over to a freiends house last night and we were all getten ready for this party down at the beach so we was gettin ready and im like hay man i dont want to drive to night so im going to drive out there and have him drive home since he dont drink anyways me and my freiend and his lil bro get in there cars out there and im folowing them but i have to run by the store and get soem papers and a blunt stick and some beer so i go to the store right when i was pulling a truck comes out of no where and almost hits me and im like all well its hard to see my truck at night its cool well i get all the shit and get in my truck i pull around the back and pull out my papers cause im just going to roll one here and smoke along the way to the beach so i roll me a nice fat joint up and im light it up as im pullin out of the store and i see that same truck pass by me and i pull out like know ones bussiness and i see him cut a a uturn and im like fuck so i drop the hammer on my tuck just burn my tires for at least 20ft and get the fuck out of there by the time i get into 3rd gear i cant even see him know more so i start to slow down and im like hell yeah then i see some bright ass lights in my rear view mirrior and so i punch it again and hear my rpms in my truck jump from 2000 to 5000 intantly was bad ass and i kepp it goin untill i reach about 115 and i let off and i call my freiends that i was being folowed and ill be at the party as im like 30 ft from the road i die im out of gas im like fuck why didnt i put some gass in the truck then i reach nehind my seat and grab my bat i keep in my truck just for this so i jump out the truck with a bat in hands and half a joint in my mouth and the truck just keep going by and one of the guys at the party ran out there cause they heard my truck so he walks up and like what happend im like i ran out of gas and hes like shit so we walk up to the party finish up my joint its like any other party abunch of girls that where stuck or trying to get fucked by anything so i was like fuck this so i go roll ablunt up grabs my freind lil bro and this girl i went to high school with and we went sat on the brigde and smoked a blunt then i went and tagged the brigde so we get back and my older bro gets there on his motorcycle and we smoke another blunt with him and i grab my bottle of grey goose yea i drink the bad ass shit so i start pouring shots im on my 5th one feeling preety good and one of my buddys sayshes about to get jumped so i get my older bro and my freiends we leave with the quickness (i went and filled my truck up earler)so i get in my truck and start haulin ass im doing ninty knowing cops are on this road all the time and i pass one and see hm turn around and im like fuck it turn off my lights and put the hammer down well i see a road block up ahead and slow down and throw out all my shit my weed,papers ,empty vodka bottle,and a roach or two well i pull up and they just wave me threw and im like hell yeah and the car that was folowing me was a cop and im like fuck so i go down past the road block about 100 yards and i turn acting like i was going to my house and i see nothing but red and blue so i stop and a women cop comes up to me and she is hot for a older lady you know for about thrity so shes like mr.roller do you realize that you didnt use your turn signal back at that turn i said well yes mam i remeber putting it on and she says well from what i seen you didnt so she runs my id and insurance everything checks out and shes well you can leave as shes handing my id back she leans in a litlle bit and gets kinda close to my face she leans back and said sir have you been drinking and im like well yes mam actually ive been drinking all night and she laughed
and said well you think you can make it home with out hitting anything and im like yes mam and she gives me my id and insurance card as im leaving i look and theres a peice of paper with her number on it and her name jessica i swear to god so i call my buddy and tell him what happend hes like damn they lost a cop on a dirt road so i meet them at mc donalds and my freiends tells me about a party so we go out there and we show up and i dont have a shirt on just shorts and sandals and some dude walks up to me and asks me if im here to fight and im like no im here to party and there like alright and hand me a beer so we drink for about an hour or so and i notice my freiends lil bro is know where to be found he just turned 18 so hes trashed and gettin some poonani from some fat chick in a closet it was funny so we get him out and start to go home and he rides with me smelin like some rotton poonnani and i role down the windows and he just throws up every where and im laughing caus eits funny and after hes just laying his head out the window so i kept slamming the brakes to fuck with him and then we go back and look for my weed and i find it yes i found it greatest day of my life and so im dirving hom its liek 6:00 in the morning and thinking about all the shit happend all that night and so i spark up my joint that i threw out and it hit me so hard and i get to th house and theres uncle steve chillin the smoking a cig and im uncle steve hit this joint and he smokes with me and we go in and lay down and im vibrating and i pass out in the recliner so i wake uo by my older bro sayin get up lets go smoke so go smoke and chill outside for a bit untill every one wakes up and so where out thre and some dogs comes up to the yard and our dog starts humping it and our dog was fucking a guy dog then jizzed all over his back it was so gross but then i got up went over took a shower got woke up and went to work 6 min late and they sent me home so i went to the casino with uncle steve and one 249$ in black jack and then we went and smoke a joint and i came home and now im on the comp just chillin

but yeah that has to be the crazyest night in a long time

and im thinking about callin that cop lady for some older poonani just to try it out you know dont want it to go to waist lol alright guys im out for awile im going to go smoke half a joint

 

sorry guys i was fucked up and try to write this ill go and fix it

 

all of the events are in this story are all true


So I went over to a freiends house last night. And we were all getten ready for this party down at the beach. So we was gettin ready and im like hay man i dont want to drive to night so im going to drive out there and have you drive home since he dont drink anyways me and my freiend and his lil get in there cars and im folowing them.


But I have to run by the store and get some papers and a blunt stick and some beer. So I go to the store right when I was pulling a truck comes out of no where and almost hits me. Im like all well its hard to see my truck at night its cool. Well I get all the shit and get in my truck. I pull around the back and pull out my papers cause im just going to roll one here and smoke along the way to the beach. So I roll me a nice fat joint up and im light it up.

As im pullin out of the store and I see that same truck pass by me and I pull out like know ones bussiness. I see him cut a a uturn and im like fuck. I drop the hammer on my tuck just burn my tires for at least 20ft. And get the fuck out of there by the time I get into 3rd gear I cant even see him know more. So I start to slow down and im like hell yeah then I see some bright ass lights in my rear view mirrior. So I punch it again and hear my rpms in my truck jump from 2000 to 5000 intantly it was bad ass. I keep it goin untill I reach about 115 and i let off and i call my freiends that. I was being folowed and ill be at the party. As im like 30 ft from the road I die im out of gas. Im like fuck why didnt I put some gas in the truck? Then I reach behind my seat and grab my bat I keep in my truck. Just for this so I jump out the truck with a bat in hands and half a joint in my mouth!! The truck just keep going by. One of the guys at the party ran out there cause they heard my truck. So he walks up and like what happend im like I ran out of gas and hes like shit. So we walk up to the party finish up my joint.

Its like any other party abunch of girls that where stuck up or trying to get fucked by anything. So I was like fuck this. So I go roll a blunt up grab my freinds lil bro and this girl I went to high school with. And we went sat on the brigde and smoked a blunt. Then I went and tagged the brigde so we get back and my older bro gets there on his motorcycle. We smoke another blunt with him and I grab my bottle of grey goose. Yea I drink the bad ass shit so I start pouring shots im on my 5th one. Feeling preety good and one of my buddys calls and says hes about to get jumped.

So I get my older bro and my freiends we leave with the quickness (I went and filled my truck up earler)So I get in my truck and start haulin ass. Im doing ninty knowing cops are on this road all the time.

I pass one and see him turn around and im like fuck it turn off my lights and put the hammer down. Well i see a road block up ahead and slow down. Throw out all my shit my weed,papers ,empty vodka bottle,and a roach or two. Well i pull up and they just wave me threw. Im like hell yeah and the car that was folowing me was a cop. im like fuck So i go down past the road block about 100 yards. I turn acting like I was going to my house and I see nothing but red and blue.

So i stop and a women cop comes up to me and she is hot for a older lady you know for about thrity. So shes like mr.roller do you realize that you didnt use your turn signal back at that turn. I said well mam I remeber putting it on. She says well from what I seen you didnt. So she runs my id and insurance everything checks out. shes well you can leave as shes handing my id back she leans in a litlle bit and gets kinda close to my face. She leans back and said sir have you been drinking. im like well yes mam actually ive been drinking all night and she laughed!!! Said well you think you can make it home with out hitting anything. Im like yes mam and she gives me my id and insurance card. As im leaving I look and theres a peice of paper with her number on it and her name jessica. I swear to god! So I call my buddy and tell him what happend. Hes like damn we lost a cop on a dirt road.

So he says hay man I know where another party is. You guys want to hit that up? So we go to this party and I get out of the truck. This dude walks up to me and asks me if im here to fight? Im like no im here to party. There like alright and hand me a beer. So we drink for about an hour or so and I notice my freiends lil bro is know where to be found? He just turned 18 so hes trashed. Gettin some poonani from some fat chick in a closet. It was funny so we get him out. And start to go home and he rides with me. Smelin like some rotton poonnani. I role down the windows and he just throws up every where. Im laughing cause its funny. After hes just laying his head out the window. I kept slamming the brakes to fuck with him. then we go back and look for my weed. I find it yes!! I found it!! Greatest day of my life. So im dirving hom its like 6:00 in the morning. Juust thinking about all the shit happend all that night. So I spark up my joint. That I threw out and it hit me so hard. I get to the house and theres Uncle Steve chillin the smoking a cig. Im like hay uncle steve hit this joint and he smokes with me. We go in and lay down and im vibrating and i pass out. In the recliner. So I wake up by my older bro sayin get up lets go smoke. so go smoke and chill outside for a bit. Untill every one wakes up. So where out thre and some dogs comes up to the yard. Our dog starts humping it. Our dog was fucking a guy dog then jizzed all over his back. It was so gross. But then I got up went over took a shower got woke up. went to work 6 min late. They sent me home so I went to the casino with uncle steve and one 249$ in black jack. Then we went and smoke a joint and I came home and now im on the comp just chillin

but yeah that has to be the crazyest night in a long time.

Im thinking about callin that cop lady for some older poonani just to try it out you know dont want it to go to waist lol alright guys im out for awile im going to go smoke half a joint.

 

Sorry about that i zoned out and all i could do was type.But that one is alot better