Weed is my only true friend. (serious)

"Wanna know the crazy thing? In school, when i'm high...I can attract girls like crazy. You know that look in a girls eye where she's trying to figure out WHY she suddenly fell head over heels for you? Well, I'm that guy. I constantly attract girls randomly by just being a funny/honest. I've been told i'm handsome, smart, creative, etc... I can fix anything, I can fix your car without any mechanical training, I can be witty, etc...lets cut this short, I have skills yet I'm unable to get a returned call for some shitty part time job at some shitty company who's only use for me is to follow a script or guidelines that disregard my skills or creativity."

Oh gee how sad

 

Hey man, I can feel where you are coming from. I was raised by a single parent who basically would say "oh cool" if I said I got straight A's, but if I forgot to take out the trash would rag on me until I felt like a total piece of lazy worthless shit for the rest of the night.

I go through periods in my life where I feel very mentally healthy, happy, and I go through periods of my life where I spend half the day wishing I wasn't living this life anymore (not necessarily suicidal ideation), along with insane amounts of anxiety. I smoke weed for the anxiety and the insomnia related to it. I've always been extremely creative, but repressed throughout school by extremely strict teachers who attempted to mold every single person the same way. I was never allowed to explore my creativity, and I think it's a damaging experience.

You sound like you're potentially bipolar or borderline. I, myself, am 21 and just met with a neuropsychologist for the first time in my life last night. I've seen psychiatrists, but all they will do is give you pharm pills blindly and probably make your condition worse, honestly. They'll hear depression and not explore things like bipolar disorder and you can potentially be fucked by the medication they prescribe. After this Christmas, I'll begin the process of undergoing real testing for the first time in my entire life, everything from IQ tests to personality tests...

I've been smoking three years, it's the only thing I can depend on to keep me calm, help me sleep, allow me to be functionable, and is pretty much the building block of most of my friendships.

Tl;dr, you're not alone. Think about seeing a really good psychologist who will do testing and help you find strategies to cope with what you're going through.

 

Your not alone. I, too, feel like weed is a true friend... so to speak. I dont have much of a social life. My life is very boring. I Wake up, work a few hours, then im home the rest of the day. When Im high, theres always something to do and Im never bored. Even if Im just watching tv, its not boring when im high. When I go to my shitt job, doing shit labor, for shit money, the only happiness i get everyday comes from my weed.

Smoking bud Is a nice little outlet on life for me. weed will brighten up your life and let you see the brighter side.

 

Eating properly and working out will give you a natural high not so dissimilar from weed obviously not as intense. Getting a job would help, for me just getting off work in and of itself gives me a high or puts me in a excellent mood anyway. Theirs no reason you should require weed to be happy, that is essentially making weed a crutch like alcohol, that's not the impression we want to give people about it if its ever to be legal.

 

My suggestion then is just introspection and browsing the internet for how people get through the kind of shit you're going through. I found out a long time ago that a lot of my problems stem from the fact my thinking is so negative, and the reason I smoke is to turn off my thinking (which is why I don't dig sativas very much). I think this is the case with a lot of us... I have barrages of negative thinking that can lead to depression (when it's thoughts focusing about the past, how I've fucked up good things I had going for me, etc.), or anxiety when I'm thinking about fears of panic attacks or embarrassment.

If you can relate, there's a ton of great ways to calm your mind outside of weed that you don't need medical insurance for, like losing yourself in exercise or meditation. It just takes discipline and practice.

 

ive got ur solution break up and have sex with as many chicks possible and stay high

 

yea weed is the only thing that keeps my stress, anger, anxiety at a controllable level, i dont know how i would be able to funtion without it. its truly a medication for me

 

And the problem is?

 

New friends don't come to you; you go out and make them.

 

Hey man i feel deeply for you.I was in the same boat only im much younger then you.Excluding the job and a serious gf its exactly alike.I went months being terribly depressed and hating life.I was never up to killing myself but believe me if i could have just died right there i would have.
Weed was there for me and was an escape to something less complicated and stressful.I ended up going to see a physcatrist who is a bitch and askes me the same questions every time and forgets the answers to them.She has not helped at all.Just askes questions and i leave.I dont have to pay though but i stopped seeing her.

To be honest things never really did get better.
Currently my last good friend will start homeschooling next semester and i will be alone in school.I know people but i dont hang out with them or am friends with them.I dont have a dealer anymore.nothing in my life is good right now.
I have the opportunity to move to nc with my grandparents.Itd be better for alot of reasons but i cant get myself to start over at a new school again

I truly hope things get better for you.
All i want in life is to work a nine to five come home smoke bud and do it all over again.

 

Enjoy the little things in your life....

 

i always say this

but

you need to give yourself something to work on, something positive, if you can get to a gym go 1 hour every day, work out, watch yourself improve, use your confidence to meet people + employers

if you cant go gym look on internet for bodyweight workouts, pressups and stuff at home 1 hour a day for 3 weeks you would look / feel like a different man

stay strong bro

 

You should stop smoking if you're telling the truth about your problems. If you miss having a social life, call up and your friends and do something nice for them. Go out of your way to be nice for someone, just don't look creepy or like a bitch. People really appreciate that shit.


Oh and get a job. Go running or some sort of exercise.

Dump that stupid bitch of a gf and go out clubbing/bars. You're 22, take advantage of it.

 

Dude ur entire story is my story except i have failed out of my school and cant afford to go to University anymore and am back living at my moms hoping to get out on my own in my own apartment in the next couple of months. But tonight i was so depressed and suicidal and then i smoked two bowls of OG Kush and im alright, still kinda sad but alot alot better...weed is the only medicine that works for me no pill has...

 

This right here.

 

I feel you man, everyone's situation is different but I know you're feeling. I have trust issues because of past experiences, maybe that's a good thing but some times I feel I take things too far.

I don't have many true friends, and the ones I do are in different cities. I do have good friends I kick it with, but most are just aquaintances that come and go after a few months. My life also revolves pretty heavily around bud, so I need to be careful who I befriend and how/where. It's hard sometimes.

It's also hard to find sexual relationships besides a few week flings and one night stands.

But hey, it is what it is and I haven't changed so I must be enjoying everything in some way.