I've had a rough year unfortunately i'm currently a college student, but as I said in a seperate post i've failed 2 of my classes and got a D in one and now i'm on academic probation. What turned into a dream come true, going from community college to a university, has turned into a nightmare I feel. I've joined a fraternity which i've had a blast since joining and finally have friends to hang out with, but there's been alot of instances that hasn't set right with me since then that involved me and the brothers. And I feel i've turned into a person I that I don't really like since joining for example I tried to cheat off of a brother that I had class with which I haven't tried cheating EVER in my college career. He ended up with a D+ and I got a F for the class. I just look bad right now plus I live in a crappy off campus fraternity house in the same city which I live in with no job, which I don't really have to work because i'm rich. This is because I won a settlement suit from my mom's death. I have enough money to get me and my grandmother out of this hell hole of a house, hood and city. I feel the relationship between me and her has gone down hill but not really frankly because we have different views on issues in this world such as cannabis. She knows I smoke but I haven't completely came out and admitted it. I've smoked in the house countless times without her knowing and even grew weed in the house the summer before last. This is just one of the stupid mistakes i've made over the past 3 years. Before joining my fraternity i've been a loner ever since senior year of High school and I feel god had made it that way for a reason and the end result was making the deans list many times and obtainging my asscociates degree. Just this past year i've lost a brother of the fraternity because he commited suicide. I've also lost my uncle shortly after that and my aunt in Novemeber. And because of all of this I feel i've comitted a time paradox some how by the very day I moved into the dorm room in which I met a brother of the fraternity. Our fraternity has a low graduation rate which really disturbs me. I feel i've surrounded myself with bad influences because most of the brothers do other drugs and since joining i've started drinking beer and liquor. I feel the devil and his demons are right on my heels because i'm so close to meeting my end goal of completing school and proving him and the people in my past wrong. I've met some really nasty people that has made smart remarks right in front of my face that has brought back bad memories and demons from the past from being picked on alot back in school. Right now i'm considering distancing myself from the fraternity by moving out and commuting, and becoming a loner again even though I just got elected secretary of my chapter. Sometimes I feel I sold my soul unwillingly to my fraternity and the devil and god is punishing me for it. My fraternity brothers don't know I feel this way. When I learned that I was put on academic probabtion I was scared and right now i'm asking myself what the fuck has happened to me? It was just yesterday that I was 18 with a fresh mind excited to start my freshmen year of community college. Right now I just want to start from sqaure one that very same day on everything in my life.
Dude fuck college, there are a huge pack of dumb mother fuckers in college and when they graduate they are still dumb mother fuckers with a piece of paper. Start a business and be your own boss then you can be 100% sure your boss is an asshole. Seriously think about starting a business you can run. Ill tell you a funny short story..... I have a friend, worked as a roofer, went to college to get a degree in business. Well he moved to Texas about 1 month before a big ass hurricane hit, he hired a shitload of guys and made a fortune in the roofing business. I wish you the best and hope you get your hurricane.
Thanks but that's the thing i've been wanting to go to college ever since I was like 12 for some reason. And one day I plan on opening my own dispensary
man I'm in a similar position. I went to a community college before transferring to a university and I managed to get straight As. now I just finished my first semester of university failing two classes. I'm not in a frat, but I've been partying, smoking, drinking, and messing with a lot more chicks than I should. just way too many distractions. I've also been put on academic probation. the worst part about all of this is disappointing my parents. I still have to pay $500 for my Spring semester of college and my parents don't want to pay for it because of my grades. the thing is, I know I fucked up but I also know I could do a lot better and correct myself. you just gotta focus on what is truly important: school. I live in a shitty dorm and it has definitely been a huge change from living at home. on top of that, I'm broke as shit with no job. what I suggest to you, is to separate yourself from the brothers who are using drugs and negatively impacting you. spend more time with those who focus their studies and surround yourself with positive people. my mistake was becoming friends with all the potheads and party animals on my hall. there's nothing wrong with that, but spending excessive time with those kinds of people can fuck you up in the long run.
I really understand where you are coming from man. I used to be a huge loner and I still am. My GPA is excellent in college so far, but I really have not made any true friends that respect me for who I am. I would say the number one thing you need to focus on is your grades. Those are going to determine what kind of job you will get after graduating and ultimately how you want your life to be. Next I would suggest maybe dropping out of the frat or at least telling them that you have a problem with what is going on (or that you have your own problems and maybe need some help.) Being a loner is a tough road my friend, I'm sure you understand that. Go and try to make friends that are more about school and less about partying and drinking liquor/beer. Ultimately, you need to decide what it is you want and apply it to your life. Hope that helps!
yeah you gotta decide exactly what you want and make sure nothing is standing in your way to obtain it. stay with the frat if you can handle it and still get good grades, but honestly if you feel you cant, then get out of the frat, you just gotta be honest with yourself. it sucks being a loner sure, but it feels empty if you only have "friends" because you are willing to suffer in other areas of your life. we think ppl care if we're fitting in or not but really everyone is looking our for themselves in the end. when I went to uni none of my HS friends came to the same one so I started back at 0 and it gets lonely but it's a transitory period in life. i left school after 1.5 years because it wasn't coming together and making any sense for me and I was losing motivation...jus couldn't think of a reason to be there spending money i just didnt have while i didnt even know what i wanted to "be". but i hope the best for you in your situation and like you said gettin a better life...let me tell you though hard work and simply being nice to ppl really does come back around, people remember you as a good person. i grew up always being nice and helpful, while my brothers were lazy and assholes, and these days i realize people remember me as that hardworking kid and dont mind helping me out if i need it. no one likes wasting their time with ungrateful people
Thanks for the advice guys don't get me wrong there's been times that i've been proud to be brother and they're great guys at times, and there's been alot of things that I thought I wouldn't do like the community service that we do. And I forgot to mention that this was the first time I tried to take a full load since freshman year at the community college. I just really wanted to pass all of my classes I guess
[quote name="420Juggalo610" post="19268583" timestamp="1388686302"]Thanks but that's the thing i've been wanting to go to college ever since I was like 12 for some reason. And one day I plan on opening my own dispensary[/quote]Imo get away from this frat im not saying their bad people or not your friends but i do think part of your problem is partying to much and not being focused on your long term goal.
Sometimes our dreams are not what we think, sometimes we confuse our dreams with what others expect from us. First you have to ask yourself if this is really what you want or if it is something that someone wants for you. Then if it is really your dream, I am SURE nothing will stop you . Here it is something to inspire you : "A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing" - George Bernard Shaw