^^ Haha I have plenty of those Not a week goes by that I don't think 'wow im fuckin growing up.' And yes weeks go by very fast especially when you are busy with college. I just don't want to live my life knowing that one day I will be a grandparent looking back at how time went by so fast. Thats why I've been trying to make everyday count. Everyone will eventually die, some sooner than others.
When you're just shy of forty and you must began to make peace with your family history of sudden heart failure and how it could affect you sometime in the next two decades.
I was reading an old journal. when i was 14, just about this time, a few years ago, i read that i felt like i needed to focous on studying, and getting a job.. i wasted to get a job waving a sign over spring break. damn, i grew up too fast!
Man I grew up so much faster than everyone around me, I've always felt like almost all of my peers were behind. I guess it was because I had life-saving heart surgery at 12 years old, I still remember getting all the "get better soon" cards drawn by all my class mates. That's when I first thought "What if I had died?". I've been living my life for today ever since, making the most of every moment. I experienced that moment of regret/nostalgia everyones talking about when I was 15 and had to move out of state because of my moms job. Ever since then I have never looked back on my life and said "I wish I would've done something different". Instead, I do shit differently today. The moment you start appreciating your life, is the moment you stop caring about yourself. What would happen if you died right now? What would the people you leave behind have to say about you at your funeral if you died TODAY. Start thinking about this in your every day life, start living to better the lives of the people around you. I guess another reason I matured so fast is because I've always had to be the "man" of the family, my mom raised me and my little brother herself her entire life, she was usually working so I always had most of the responsabilities of maintaining the household. I got my first real job at 16 working construction to help pay for all of my expenses and help my mom pay for the families. I just turned 19 last month, but mentally I feel like I'm 30. I'm living on my own, completely self sufficient, and already have enough in my bank for a down payment on a nice home. But I still feel great, I'm happy, I have a handful of close friends I can talk about anything to, and I have a steady relationship with a girl I love. And I just met my biological father last month in Holland. Sorry to post so much, this is just a really great topic. +Rep OP, this thread really reminded me of just how beautiful life can be.
Yeah man, one open heart surgery here at 3 months old and another at 15. I'd never make it seem like a big deal, it doesn't hinder me (especially since after the last one my heart is as efficient as any other) but I'd be lying if I said I didn't think about it every hour or so. I have to get one again in 15-20 years (though now it's closer to 10-15) and I'm hoping technology changes by then so they don't need to saw open my sternum one more time. I responded to your post to say that going through something like that helped me look ahead at my life rather than stay in Kid-Land because I realized I would need a purpose within the next 20 years if I was going to go through the trouble to stay living. It doesn't drive me, and I don't live every day like my last, but it reminds me every single day how fragile we are, how incredible it is that we all have these fantastic machines providing for us, and how easily they could fail. This was a pretty big epiphany for a 15 year old laying in a hospital bed, and that was a trial in my life that helped me to become a man. PS- I bet you have a badass scar down your chest like I do.
Hm, I guess freshman year of college when I started having to take care of myself...washing clothes and shit. Not having a mom to clean up after me and shit.
The first time I voted, (I missed the presidential election by a month, so I had to vote in the 2009 primaries) When my my sisters picked me as the godfather for my 2 youngest nephews I'm going to be my oldest nephews confermation sponser this friday my first day of college my first day of work that's all I can think of now
Tetralogy of Fallot Surgery 1 Worst Part: Hole between two ventricles. (three other things too, I'm not gonna bore you with the details) Fix: Patch, other things, cutting pulmonary valve (from heart to lungs, see Surgery 2) Surgery 2 Worst Part: No pulmonary valve (see how they fucked me when they saved me?) Fix: Implanting valve All Subsequent Surgeries Replacing the valve from calcification ...yeah, tried to give it really condensed, I didn't want to bore anyone...
just being in college now makes me realize how immature 9/10 of all high schoolers are. growing up is a great part of life though in my opinion. i enjoyed my high school days and all but i'm just ready to move on with my life and face new challenges. TO THE FUTURE
when i found out my girl (now my wife was preggo) and even more when my baby was born....ludacris has a quote that i love "a kid who had a kid, my kid made me a grown up," this quote pretty much sums up when i felt like "man, I'm growing up..."
Ya I don't live every day like its my last either, but I do try to do the right thing n shit. I never made it into a big deal either I still played sports and fucked around just like nothing ever happened. I'll be damned if I'm gonna let anything stop me, especially my heart haha. How you put it is a little more accurate, it really does make you think about how fragile and momentary life is, it can be snatched away in an instant. You might not even see it coming. But unfortunately no, I don't have a bad ass scar down my chest lol. I was diagnosed with a rare disease called PQTS (prolonged QT syndrdome), anyway long story short it has to do with the electrical signals in my brain fuckin up and not telling my heart to beat so I had to have a pacemaker put in to revive me if it ever stops again. It actually looks exactly like a bullet wound, I always tell everybody I got shot lmao. "Yeah, the bullet missed my heart by half an inch". haha
Damn good to hear it's all fixed though, strange thing to have your main life source threatened (besides, of course, the brain). Take it easy man.