this drug test will decide my future

i here ya buddy... it's damn hard to stand up for what you believe in without persecution. i have a similar choice... 'cept it has a slightly higher impact on my life than me possibly going to military school. i can either keep smoking weed, or have a roof over my head and food in my stomach. if i fail my urin tests (which will be given randomly by my parents) i no longer have a home... i love weed and will defend it with all i have, but i guess me having a home is more important to me than me getting high. hopefully i'll beable to get the hell outta here soon.

lol, sorry about goin' on about my probs. i hope everything works out for you. you might wanna consider buying a fake piss kit from the net or high times or something. as long as you can conceal it pretty well you'll pass your UT and not have to go to military school.

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Edit: or if money/time is a concern with ordering the fake piss, have one of your friends who's straight (and who you can trust not to tell anyone) piss for ya... but you'll have to figure out a way to keep it warm if they test temp.

 

that is some madly fucked up shit my friend... I agree with cottons though, find a friend to piss for ya and make it worth his while

good luck man

 

yea man it makes me really angry that people base weather you get kicked out or not on weed. if you get straight a's then it is obviously not affecting you. it is the same way at my school

 

Weed... Shrooms... Xanax......

Don't just complain about persecution for weed! lol

Man... your best bet (and possibly only savior) is to substitute clean urine for yours.

Do a search for "urine substitution" at any search engine. There are plenty of sites that sell clean urine concentrate.

Or you can have a friend piss for you. Just make sure it's at body temp.

If you can't do this... then I'd start suckin' it up... soldier.

I hate to sound too "parent"ish here, but holy shit that's some heavy duty partying for a school aged person! I'm not really aware of what exactly a boarding school is.. but it sounds like it's a place where you are sent because there's been trouble.

If that's the case, then you should expect to be under the microscope. I'm not sayin' that it's necessarily right, but the wise decision would be to realize what position you are in and do what is best to get your desired results.

Boarding school doesn't sound too fun.. so that in it's self might not be a desired result.

But doin' shrooms and roaming your dorm.... sounds risky! You're working towards getting a hair or blood test is my guess. Then you would be totally fucked.

So... get someone to piss for you and stop acting suspiciously! Then hopefully you can keep fooling them with your substituted piss and further action won't be taken (ie. hair/blood test or military school).

That being said... yes it does suck that "they" can do a lot of nasty shit to you in life just for testing positive for weed.

Does everybody get tested at your school?

 

I've heard that drinking mad amounts of water before your test can dillute your urine enough so that nothing will show up, but I haven't tried this myself..

 

If your on the toilett alone when "pissing in the glass"..and you got someone elses piss(clean), isnt it possible to just add a little bitt hot water from the sink to it just to make it seem warm? they can't find that out can they?

 

Well... depending on the kind of test they perform...

But if they send the test to a lab they will do a creatine test and some other shit to see if it's too dilute to be urine. (Which is why drinking lots of water might cause a problem)

But if you passed before with pills, then they probably aren't too sophisticated.

And as for keeping the urine warm.... (if you need to) you can put it in a washed out condom and tape it to your inner thigh. Then just poke it and let the urine drain out into the cup. (They don't actually watch you piss do they?)

Just be wise, m'friend. Soon all of this shit will be over and you'll be on your own. Then you can puff up with impunity (provided you act wisely).

 

now THAT sounds like a plan

 

Maybe it's just me but it really seems like a bad idea to take twentry of anything, as I understand it even some vitamins can be dangerous in such large doses. If it's a sort of last resort I'd consider doing that (especially considering that they had worked before). If I were you however, I would take a lower dose of those pills every so often (maybe every four hours) and drinking two glasses of water and a glass of cranberry or grapefruit juice every two hours. If you are going to use your own urine then piss early and often, it's a good sign (but not a sure fire one) if your urine is mostly clear (this last thing could be wrong). In any case you did fuck up at least a bit and you should try to do something. There comes a point where you can't just say fuck it.

 

everyone has given really good advice.. and if you actually pass, take the hint and stop acting so sketchy and irresponsible.. i mean, no offense, but if my parents were crazy enough to send me to military school over something as stupid as a drug test i sure as fuck wouldnt let them know i do anything 'bad'.. like, at ALL

whatever though man, good luck on the test

 

the condom plan sounds like a good one, but if youre watched....it wont work

in case you are watched, i would be drinking as much water as you possibly can. as long as your piss is diluted, a week after smoking weed probably wont show up. just drink lots of water before you go to school.

oh yeah, catch your piss mid-stream, the first is the dirtiest. ive passed three drug tests by diluting my piss - one was two or three days after smoking and given to me by the state. dont worry to much, it wont help. good luck

 

Clean out kits generally work pretty well but you have to follow the instructions exactly. Almost all the products are basically a mixture of gelatin (to absorb impurities) and vitamins to restore normal color.

I have a friend who used one to pass several probation tests when she was dirty with pot and crank. If they use the test where they just drip the pee onto a special test card, those are easy to pass but a blood, hair or even a more sensitive urine chemical analysis test would be much harder to beat. Fortunately those more sensitive tests cost much more to do so most people don't use them.

If you were a girl you could hide a small vile of a friends urine in the obvious place but it is a lot more difficult for guys to keep the temperature correct.

type "drug clean out kit" in your favorite search engine and you might find http://www.howtopassadrugtest.com/ among many others.

Good luck and a little advice. If you continue to keep your grades up despite your usage, you may be able to bargain a better deal than military school. You need to prove that your habit has no effect on your performance, then you may gain acceptance form your folks at least. A tall order perhaps but it has kept me under the radar for nearly 20 years.

Are you in boarding school because you already got kicked out of public or because your parents just don't have the time to raise you themselves? (don't answer, it's rhetorical) Perhaps its all their fault and you should be home smoking moderate amounts of weed with dad at the kitchen table while you do your algebra homework together. Maybe then you wouldn't be interested in the shrooms or the xanax. Ok maybe that's not your life but it sure would solve a lot of problems.

 

This got me thinking, there is one place that a guy could stick something if he weren't being watched at all, many guys wouldn't want to for various reasons butt (heh) if you're desparate you might want to put your faith in the heating abilities of your hiny. Just don't put anything glass in there that can easily break. That's no fun (well, maybe for some people... nevermind).

 

crazy hare that was the first thing i thoght of... but the inner thigh, right next to the nut sack would be more discreet and comfortable.

 

do the condom thing, but also get a glue gun, a long and thin rubber tube (preferably penis color, but clear would still work), some double sided tape / non-reflective tape, a comb, a small clamp or one of those small paper-alligator clips.

attach the tube to the condom with hotglue, securely attack the condom using the tape to your groin or armpit, and send the other end of the tube to your penis. tape the tube under your penis, one at the base of your dick (caugh, i mean penis.), and one where your foreskin and penis-head meet. (guys know where). fold the tube at the very tip and clamp it. try your best to hide the clamp, and PRACTICE PISSING with water.

and make sure that...

if you're gonna put the condom in your armpit, make sure the tube goes between your ass crack to your penis. and use the comb to comb your genital hair outward. good luck.


this is one phucked up post.

 

haha, 'penis color'

I think I saw that in a box of crayons once.

 

Wow relief, you been watching old reruns of Macgyver?

 

=] an episode where macguyver does the above to pass a piss test... doesn't sound right.