Well fellow Blades, this is about it for me I'm afraid. On Thursday I'm off to college and I am depressed about leaving everything behind, my ganj hookups, my friends, my family, my dog. It just seems to soon in my life to be striking out from the surroundings I grew up in, its like I haven't had enough fun yet, I haven't experienced enough. My life had been pretty boring and I'm sad to leave that one behind seemingly unfulfilled to start a new chapter. To compound all of this is the fact that I'm out of ganj and the friend I use to get hookups through is still on vacation. I don't know if I'm getting wet feet just now when the time is drawing near that I have to leave but I am pretty depressed right now looking back at the youth I spent unproductively. It also doesn't help that I am socially awkward and not very good at meeting people and even worse at handling a relationship. I had considered taking a year off but with my mother's health insurance I need to be in college right after high school to be covered at least until I can afford my own plan (here's hoping Obama passes reform including a public option). I'm not going to the school of my choice either because of financial restraints (not really complaining about that, life is what it is, I'm just venting). I feel like I'm having this thrust upon me. I know that might sound a bit petulant or whiny but I really don't feel like I'm genuinely prepared yet at this point in my life to strike out on my own and leave everything familiar behind. Is it a question of whether I'm responsible enough? No I don't think so, I've had responsibility in my life, held several jobs and was considered a hard worker hell my last boss even wrote a reccomendation for me saying I "had a good work ethic" I think he might have been being kind but I'm certainly not lazy. Is it a question of maturity? Perhaps it is, I just don't know and it doesn't help that I've never been good at deciphering my own thoughts or the meaning in my own life. Perhaps i'm over analyzing all of this but I don't think so, I think introspection is important. Basically I don't know what I wan't out of life at this point and the fact that I have my whole life ahead of me kinda scares me considering my indecisiveness in what I'm told is a very critical turning point that may shape my life. Should I stay home and lose health insurance coverage even though this might be the right choice for me at this time (a typical job that I could land quickly would NOT pay for this and there is a grave danger in going uninsured as my aunt can attest to, she owes over fifty-thousand dollars in medical bills because of her cancer treatments.). Or should I go off to the school that I didn't want to go to and end up taking loans to pay for it that I will be paying off for many years to come and endure my probable misery. I wan't to do well in life but at the same time I don't wan't to rush into things I might not be ready for. I just don't know blades and I need some advice from those who may be wiser than I.
Is there a community college in your neighborhood. You stay in school and stay close to everything your used to.
dude, I feel the same way, I moved in to my dorm friday. I had an amazing summer filled with all my friends and family, and everything is different here. In a good way though, for example at 2am last night i walked down to my friends room and watched super troopers, although we werent high it was still fun to have that kind of freedom in my life. Its going to be hard, the entire drive to school I was having second thoughts about whether I really wanted to go or not, but now that im here I DO NOT want to leave, and get this, I havent found any bud yet, met a couple tokers but still warming up to them. Good luck with your situation, I'm sure everything will turn out better than expected.
You'll get many a weed hook up in college assuming it is rather large and you'll make new friends and shit will become more familar.
id say go to college, have a damn good time. just be relaxed pretty much everyone there has the same awkward "i dont know anybody" vibe, so just chill. youll meet new ppl with bud, make new friends, and make great memories. just make sure you do put some time into school. you may not feel like you finished one chapter but college is gonna be a whole new book for ya man, ya have next summer to finish up your first ch when everyones back in town. not having health insurance kinda sucks, i dont right now cause im not in school, and i cant go longboarding cause i really dont wanna make my ankle worse (i rolled it bad a bit ago). if you do have money problems then gettin a job and just making money can be nice. but you might also be stuck in your town with out any of your close friends, ganj connects, and just get really depressed about it all.
I'm just gonna be really straight forward. You just have anxiety. Ignore your thoughts and push yourself into college. If you don't you might spend the rest of your life working at a gas station.
Fosho on go to college, there's loadsa friendly people there, and I'm sure everyone's outgrown the highschool drama bs. And there's toooonnnnsss of parties and weed, of course. It should be a great expirence. And you shouldn't think of it as the ending, but a new beginning.. this is your chance to make the best of your college years!
College will be the best time of your life if you do it right. start out fresh and b who u want to be. if it doesnt work out you can always transfer...its not permanent.
as far as finding a weed hookup you really dont need to worry. just go to your library or the major quad or whatever is the outside hangout place at your school and ask someone who looks like they might smoke / know where to get some. (im not saying that all stoners look a certain way, but youll know if you see someone who looks like they smoke.) and other than that relax. college is going to be the best time of your life. i love it here.
Here here! Everyone in this thread talking about college is right. I love college so much, I've been in it for 8 years so far. Undergrad was the most insane time of my life. If you thought high school was filled with crazy shit, just wait. Graduate school is a little bit different, haha.
That party last night was awfully crazy I wish we taped it I danced my ass off and had this one girl completely naked Drink my beer and smoke my weed but my good friends is all I need Pass out at 3, wake up at 10, go out to eat then do it again Man, I love college.. [:
It has been my experience that college is the tightest shit ever. I'm about to start my second year and I cannot wait to return. I am sympathetic to your concerns, they seem very normal and understandable. However, you may be thinking of college as more of a drastic change than it really is. It may feel like you will have many more responsibilities. In reality, college is still a pretty sheltered environment. At least for your first few years living on campus.
lol ya i felt the same way when i was leaving for college...but u will like it (depending on ur school lol). i met a bunch of people really fast tho cuz i was the only person in a freshman dorm with a vaporizer ( i thought a lot of people would do this, apparently not lol) so once people found out i had one i was gettin smoked up like a motherfucker...and finding connects was pretty easy too cuz of the vape...just dont get caught blazing in ur room 3 weeks in and get kicked outta the dorms for the rest of the semester like me lol