The chicken sandwich story

Well GC, it's time to reveal my famed chicken sandwich story,
which has been going around my town for a while...

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It all started in 10th grade, during lunch my group of friends were chilling in the music room, dicking around generally, when friend Isaac told us to hush up for a bit.

Apparently, he said, a crazy old chinese dude opened up a laundry mat right down the road.

So what? we replied.

So i'll give ten dollars to the first person who asks him for a chicken sandwich, he says.

I'll take that bet, you'd bet I will, I respond...little did I know.
Fast forward to the end of school.

There's four of us, Chubby, Isaac, Dylan, and me...we walk down to the Laundry Mat, which even though it's new,
it already looks abandoned and derelict, dusty windows and all.
We walk in.

There is a buff ass old chinese guy behind the counter. Looks like a cutthroat. Scary. He is on a labtop computer.

Need something? he says in a chinese brimstone deathrattle.
I push my way to the front of the group.
I need an order of a chicken sandwich, I say.
What you say to me? he replies.
I clear my throat. I say louder: Give me a fuckin' chicken sandwich!

Now this is where it takes off. he gets up, picks up the labtop, THROWS IT AT ME, I duck, it hits chubby square

in the tits.

You motherfucker, I am going to kill you, he screams as he jumps on top of the counter. He now has brass knuckles balled in his fist.

We bail instantly, tripping over each other, out the door, down to the parking lot, past the lot, on a hill.
We look down the hill. The old man is running out of his shop, hopping into a ford pickup truck, and speeding
towards us.

Out of breath, we sprint down the hill into the forest. Where to, we don't know. We don't want to die. Already I regret my desicion, why he freaked, I had no idea. Isaac is cracking up.
We make our way to the middle of the forest. There is a 8 ft tall barbed wire fence. everybody makes it over except chubby.

We are forced to leave him.

5 minutes later we are at an apartment complex. The sun is beating down on us, we are hot and sweaty and tired and
boiled to the point of exhaustion. we sit for half an hour, laughing, light up a doobie, and I get my ten bucks.

Out of nowhere a ford pickup truck speeds around the corner. It is headed straight towards us in the parking lot,
gaining speed. We jump out of the way. If we hadn't, we all would have died or become seriously injured.
The old man runs out of the car. He pins me against it. Literally lifts me off the ground, he was a muscular motherfucker.
He told me if I ever came into his shop again, he would kill me. He would kill all of us. He leaves...

I, for the most part, am bewildered. I dont know what the fuck happened...so Isaac fills us in.
The chinese guy was an ex-drug dealer, and his method of distributing heroin was this...
He used to be a foodstand vendor, and he would drop bags of H hidden in chicken sandwiches, wrapped up between the buns.
well shit...
That's not even the craziest part.
the next day at school, the first person i told about it jokingly, was his daughter.
I never knew.
what the fuck?

the end

 

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