So I'm seeing this girl - should I tell her that I'm

Discussion in 'Sex, Love & Relationships' started by NFloyd2357, May 26, 2010.

  1. a virgin?

    so this has really been racking my brain the past few days. I've been seeing this girl/taking her out for the past... ~10 days, but have known her, more as an acquaintance, for about half a year. We really have been hitting it off, and she's hinted... well, made it pretty obvious, that she wants to fuck. Thing is, I actually really like her, and she definitely digs me - but I don't wanna scare her off telling her (19) i'm a virgin (21), since i know she's pretty experienced... not in a slutty way, but ya know. I basically had a g/f until 10th grade, and broke up right before we hit that point... since then, i just never found a girl, and once i hit college, i saw how easy it was to get laid, and it was actually a big turn-off that made me do a complete 180, and instead of just wanting to fuck the first thing i could, wait for a girl i like... it took way too many years. I mean, christ i slept in her bed last night, watched her take birth control before we got in bed, and i was just too anxious to do the dirty deed... i feel like she'd understand and be cool with it, but i don't wanna fuck this up, i havent found a girl i really clicked with in a lonnng time

    geez it was even hard to come clean on this forum, nevermind to her in person
  2. Honestly bro, 50/50 on this one. Some girls find it cute, others find it kinda sad. But if she has romantic feelings for you, then she will probably find it cute.

  3. yea thats basically the way i've been looking at it... thats why i'm so torn up about it........ shit! lol

    i mean, maybe she already is assuming i could be since i wasn't all over her last night?

    hmm, lets get some more feedback lol, appreciated devoke
  4. As terrible a lay virgins are im not not going to fuck someone because they are a virgin. Especially if I have feelings for them. You should be good to go man, If it comes up tell her.
  5. Man,I think you should tell her if you both really feelin eachother.
  6. ...and if it doesn't come up, don't tell her? thats another question i shoulda asked. Like, if i'm about to get laid, and she doesn't/hasnt asked, and it hasn't been brought up... should it be at that point?
  7. Also, it would suck more to not tell her, and then be awful on your first time(no offense)? Then you either look like a scrub, or look stupid telling her you are a virgin afterwards.
  8. you should tell her. I was in a similar situation one time and I told the girl I was with. She just smiled and then later that night, she taught me a thing or two. :D
  9. tough situation man
    IMO you can either tell her and risk her being turned off, or not tell her, fuck her, and risk her discovering you're a virgin b/c you just sucked.
    i think i'd avoid telling her and just have sex with her, if she wants to and so do you
    i dont think you have much to lose in doing this...either it goes down without a hitch and you're happy OR maybe its not a good experience (but i think it will be) and she's slightly upset. but, even in that case i cant see the girl just cutting all ties just b/c you werent that great with her the first time
  10. If it doesnt come up, slide in a "Take it easy on me, Its my first time." in that little space of time between foreplay and sex. Remember to flash that smile and she should show you all her tricks.
  11. No, it's really not that big of a deal man. She's not going to be all into you then suddenly dislike you because you've never had sex. I think it's fair to say that sexual pleasure is more about the connection two people share (not physical :cool:) rather than the abilities one has, or the, err, equipment one is working with.

    Ten bucks says you two will fuck and she will never have thought a thing of it :D
  12. My v card got jacked when i was 18 about 2 yrs ago. I told the girl that I was a virgin and she was really cool about it. Told her I didn't want to dissapoint her or anything and she just said she would teach then :p. We actually started to date soon after that and are still goin strong... oh and yeah man Id say tell her. It could cause some problems if you dont.. but I was in the same shoes as you, and I was really close to lying... but she will find out, for sure.

  13. i always like your input vitamin 420 - it seems we're always on the same page. see, i kind of see it like this... i don't think i should tell her for the reasons you say not to... it shouldnt be a big deal, and saying it would make it seem that way, maybe even make it a bit awkward. but at the same time, doesn't she deserve to know, not because of the physical act but just because? ... the whole honesty goes a long way thing? just from the responses i can see why i'm so torn between saying something or nothing at all...
  14. Man, tough but if you feel that connected with her, she would probably be happy!
  15. Hey no worries man I'm just helpin' a buddy out :)

    Anyways, I think that if she's curious or if it gets brought up, then you could tell her you're a virgin, but otherwise I wouldn't think anything of it. You're right when you say it could make things awkward but then again it all depends on how you say it and when you say it. Those two would be important. A lot of people hold their "first time" as a valuable thing, but I didn't really see it as anything special, so I didn't let my girlfriend at the time know about it until she asked.
  16. Dude, if she digs you, then she shouldn't care; if you're honest and tell her up front.

    But if you try to hide it, and you're a bad lay, then she'll probably be more put off, because she was under the assumption you knew what you were doing. But by telling here now; she'll lower her expectations, and everything will work out smoother in the end, and you'll be closer because of it.

    It's like this:
    If you're looking for a relationship, then tell her now.
    If you're just looking to get laid (which you're not), then don't tell her.
  17. I say you do the deed.
    and tell her once your in. or before it doesnt matter.
    im pretty sure she would be happy to take your virginity if she has feelings for you.
    tit would definitely be special for the both of you.
  18. #18 Kr0nik, May 26, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: May 26, 2010
    I really hate to sound like a dick, but why are you asking us? After all we dont know her, your the one that knows her and how she would react. Your best bet is to talk to one of your friends that also knows her or even come up with a decision on your own. However i have to say the worst thing i think you could do is talk to one of HER friends about it, just from past experience it seems like the friends are always the most judgmental. Anyways good luck.

    By the way, I actually had nearly the same scenario. Basically my girlfriend started talking about her past boyfriends and how the last 2 were virgins before going out with her. Then i brought up the fact that i was a virgin, and 20 minutes later i wasn't.
  19. Shit man, you don't even have to tell her you're a virgin straight out like that. You could be cute about it and say something like, "I've never found anyone I wanted to do it with, before. . . until now..." Then look deep into her eyes, and tell her you love her.

    Actually, skip that last part. :p
  20. Dude. Just tell her how you feel. thats always the best thing to do in the long run.

    A virgin is an empty cup. People hate full cups because they learned how to fuck and alot of the time thats all they really care about. This is HER chance to train YOU to how a GIRL likes it. Just tell her you felt like saving for the right girl, and you want that girl to be her.

    :) Trust me. Chicks dig honesty. And honesty in this manner, is always a win.
    goodluck bradda. Just try to hold your load. If you feel like your gonna orgasm, just pause immediately, and go down on her for 1-2 minutes. After that short break, your endurance should go x5.
    She just might love you for it.

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