On a Septic Tank Truck sign: "We're #1 in the #2 business." Sign over a gynecologist's office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix." At a proctologist's door: "To expedite your visit please back in." On a Plumbers truck: "We repair what your husband fixed." On a Plumbers truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber." At a towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows." On an electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts." On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push." At an optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place." On a fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive." In a restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry? Come on in and get fed up." In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait." At a Chicago radiator shop: "Best place in town to take a leak."