Prison stories anyone?

Good friend went to the Federal Pen for some kind of crime comitted whilst stationed in Germany.


All he told me was about the usual fighting, and what it takes to survive.

On his back he now has the Imperial Eagle holding the Swastika. Covered his entire shoulder blade and mid back sections.

I've never heard anything racist out of him, and he isn't active in any organizations. He'll just look at you with dead eyes and say, "Survival."

 

Funny how they're called 'correctional facilities' and a lot of the people who go in as pretty average criminals come out as stoned-cold badasses that people are afraid to look at wrong.

 

ive been to juvenile hall for truancy, they always made me go to court and whenever i went there they would keep telling me to get better attendance and to get out of there, I expected them to do the same thing that morning but they didnt, they made me go to the back door, o yeh truancy is skipping school too much haha but yeh i was on probation for about a year before they made me go in there, it sucked, basically i was in a cell there all the time reading books, thinking to myself NEVER TRUST A PROBATION OFFICER, because i told her too much things. T_T. the food was alright ( pretty sure its 10x better then prison food, bleh since its juvenile hall), it was so boring in there my head was so tired from looking at that book, it was like my head was going to explode. Nothing much to say about being in there, but all i can say was it sucks. when i got out my mom picked me up and when i was in the car coming back home EVERYTHING WAS SO FREAKING BRIGHT IT WAS AMAZING haha..

 

[quote name='"MojoTheHobo"']ive been to juvenile hall for truancy, they always made me go to court and whenever i went there they would keep telling me to get better attendance and to get out of there, I expected them to do the same thing that morning but they didnt, they made me go to the back door, o yeh truancy is skipping school too much haha but yeh i was on probation for about a year before they made me go in there, it sucked, basically i was in a cell there all the time reading books, thinking to myself NEVER TRUST A PROBATION OFFICER, because i told her too much things. T_T. the food was alright ( pretty sure its 10x better then prison food, bleh since its juvenile hall), it was so boring in there my head was so tired from looking at that book, it was like my head was going to explode. Nothing much to say about being in there, but all i can say was it sucks. when i got out my mom picked me up and when i was in the car coming back home EVERYTHING WAS SO FREAKING BRIGHT IT WAS AMAZING haha..[/quote]

You went through all that shit just to skip school? The fuck is wrong with you?

Did you just wake up 1 day and think,
"Man fuck learning things and training my cognitive abilities, imma just take my chances without one of them useless educations!"
?

I don't get it

 

^the real fucked up part is we live in a country where you get locked up for simply skipping school. Sometimes I hate America. I know we're not the only country to do this, but that shit it just wrong to me

 

My buddy got too drunk one night, waltzed into some party with a knife and attempted to stab somebody 'ALLEGEDLY'..

Anyways, nicest kid ever going in, maybe a little rough, robbed one or two people in his time but been robbed a bunch more..

Came out the EXACT same person except his behaviour was magnified greatly and he became one of the most ruthless dudes i've ever met. A couple weeks before he was getting out some dude stabbed him like 12 or 13 times with a tooth brush and he some how survived and always shows me his scars n shit n its just crazy.

The prison system is a direct reflection on America's moral values..They would rather get money to keep you in jail than to just rehabilitiate you and correct your life. The prison system, as well as any other form of government is a complete joke. It's sad to watch from Canada, mainly because it feels like we're not AS fucked as you guys but i know we are.

 

LOL naw i didnt just wake up 1 day and think, hey i should just skip school, i had crazy insomnia problems and things back then, but ever since this school year i have had great attendance and the court is thinking about dismissing my case, I have to go to court in about 60 days and they said if my attendance is good they would dismiss it, back then i couldnt even wake up when the alarm clock would ring. idk wat was wrong with me. so thats why.. And i wasnt just skipping school, like waking up and saying im not going to school today, i would usually wake up at like 11 and say o shit i gotta get to school and miss the first 3 periods of school, thats how my average day went. i get your point though

 

They gave me 6months when I just turned 18 for selling cocaine. They arrested me with 3x10grams on me, searched my house, found over a kilo (1000grams) weed, but that was just harvested a week before and considered personal use. Those 6 months were actually not too bad, I mean.. it's not south america, it's the netherlands, plus I shared my cell with a good friend who was there before me for other things. I could get high every night, had a flatscreen tv and a ps3, it was all good. The worst thing I experienced there was some guy throwing a basketball to my face, so I smacked his head to a pole. So.. If you want some stories maybe you should watch locked up abroad on natgeo. This is all I got haha.

 

If you were caught with that much work where I am Professor X oyou would be gone for a hot minute . . . smells fishy

 

Where do you live?

 

Virginia

 

This isnt a story but a thought I had recently while taking the Browns to the Superbowl, so to speak.

I know prison rape is pretty common, and as I was making one final push, it hit me. DONT WIPE after droppin a deuce. Just walk around with a dirty and stinky bumbum and it should act as a repellent for other dudes trying to violate your rear, in theory?

Any thoughts? Or would the prison guards say its a health issue and make you wipe..? If not, i think it would be an effective defense against the horndogs. Personally id rather walk around with my own poop in/around my butthole rather than another guys wiener.

Sorry if this doesnt relate to the thread, im incredibly high.

 

This is brilliant.

 

Aight. Yeah well, I don't have anything to do with drugs anymore, just weed. But over here the prisons are full, it's rediculous, last week this guy robbed a pharmacy, he only spend 1 night in jail and got 2year probation. Plus there's this law in the netherlands that you get locked up if you got 100plants, so if you have 95plants you get a big-ass fine, but no jailtime. In the US it's too much I think, I'm watching this program on tv as we speak, some guy got 60 years for murder. I know someone who killed a person when he was 17, he got 5 years and was released after 4.

 

yea 6 months sounds about right for a non-US country. A friend of mine got raided with 700 pills on him which had a bunch of illegals in them and just got 3 years probation. Shit man badluck losing all that bud

 

I worked in a state prison for a little while. Subscribing to this thread for later when I feel like typing out a story or two.

Contrary to popular believe, prison rape is pretty rare. Most sex in prison is mutually agreed upon.

 

LOL so did I.... for 15 cents an hour


The most remarkable thing to me was how many child molesters were in general population despite the brutality inflicted on them on a daily basis. Solitary confinement (protective custody) is so torturous that people would rather get kicked in the face by a guard than stare at the walls 24/7, at least it's something. Contact with other humans is so vital to our mental health that even the most aggressive and brutal interactions are preferred over solitary.

I never understood why a chomo would prefer gp over pc, until I came to that realization.

 

did this guy really just write a kilo and then (1000grams)

give us some credit at least shit i know were all high as fuck but god damn thats some elementary shit right there

 

Speak for yourself. We didn't learn that system of measurement in school. Oddly.