Philosophy of sex - quotes

Discussion in 'Grasscity Forum Humor' started by Blix, May 9, 2004.

  1. Philosophy of sex - quotes

    "I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful,
    natural, wholesome things that money can buy."
    * Tom Clancy

    "You know "that look" women get when they want sex?
    Me neither."
    * Steve Martin

    "Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have
    a good partner, you'd better have a good hand."
    * Woody Allen

    "Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a
    date on Saturday night."
    * Rodney Dangerfield

    "There are a number of mechanical devices which
    increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is
    the Mercedes-Benz 380SL."
    * Lynn Lavner

    "Leaving sex to the feminists is like letting your dog vacation
    at the taxidermist."
    * Matt Barry

    "Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a
    rope."
    * Camille Paglia

    "Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation.!
    The other eight are unimportant."
    * George Burns

    "Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can
    fake whole relationships."
    * Sharon Stone

    "My girlfriend always laughs during sex---no matter
    what she's reading."
    * Steve Jobs (Founder, Apple Computers)

    "My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
    * Jack Nicholson

    "Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or
    where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how
    bad it is."
    * Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady-and you didn't
    think Barbara had a sense of humor)

    "Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip
    out a man's genitals through his wallet."
    * Robin Williams

    "Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I
    think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself."
    * Roseanne

    "Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a
    place."
    * Billy Crystal

    "According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable
    undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of
    other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of
    course, men are just grateful."
    * Robert De Niro

    "There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting
    that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They
    say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
    * Dustin Hoffman

    "There's very little advice in men's magazines,
    because men think, I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody
    naked."
    * Jerry Seinfeld

    "Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a
    woman I don't like and just give her a house."
    * Rod Stewart

    "See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a
    penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
    * Robin Williams
     

  2. haha... haha
     
  3. lmao, good stuff

    That's defiantely Jacks humor...

    haha, only enough blood to run one....lol
     
  4. funny stuff. keep em commin :)
     

  5. yes, keep them cumming..
     

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