To think ourselves first before thinking of others is apart of the ego, and is such an animalistic drive. Think about it, what are the most fundamental animal instincts? To survive, and to ensure our genes survive through future generations. Just from looking at that animal instinct, all living things have egos that help them not only be self aware, but do what I mentioned earlier: survive and reproduce. As humans, I feel that one of the consequences of our evolution is our self absorption, which I believe has worsened since our animal days. People are so absorbed by their views, beliefs, principles, customs, etc that they may not even be capable of looking outside of themselves. They may fail to see others' views, beliefs, principles, customs, etc, and remain completely ignorant to anyone or anything else. In so many ways we have evolved, but we are still, as Joe Rogan says, "trapped in these monkey bodies".
Self absorption isn't equivalent to having an ego. The ego must exist, because The key is to be able to observe your ego.
True, but by thinking of others I don't only just mean helping others. I mean seeing beyond our ego to see others' perspectives.
It is a shame but most people will always be about themselves first to the point where so many do not accept or even consider another point of view.. It seems like more and more people like that show themselves each day. I can't make sense of it and when I try to I get kind of angry so I just let people be it is also a part of your ego to want others to change theirs just accept other state of mind that they will not accept yours and carry on to the point were set free of these monkey bodies.. death. That sounds depressing but if you have been through the things that I have you would not think of death as depressing at all
Yes, we all needs egos. Or else, we wouldn't know whose mouth to put the food in at a resturant. But the whole point is to TAME the ego... because if it becomes out of hand, out of YOUR control, then thats what gives rise to greed, jealously, etc... "Are you angry with me, don Juan?" "No. I am never angry at anybody. No human being can do anything important enough for that. You get angry at people when you feel that their acts are important. I don't feel that way any longer."
True, but to what degree are we really even in control of our egos? I think once we figure that out we can definitely learn to not only understand our own egos, but others' as well.
The funny thing is, you can't get rid of the "ego" by any will or effort. Eventually you realize that the desire to rid one's self of the "ego" is simply an act of the "ego" (though it disguises itself very well). Then you see the futility of it all, and you see that the ego doesn't even exist, nor did it ever exist. Everything is spontenaity, the ego is just a failed effort to control that which cannot be controlled, whether it be your identity, your friends, or various events in your life. That's when the "true self" really begins to make itself known. The period just before you realize the futility of it all sucks, because you trap yourself in quite a conundrum... you are putting forth so much effort, but really there is no way to truly differentiate between thought and thinker, between action and actor. That's all the ego is, is differentiating things which can't truly be differentiated.
This is where I'm stuck. I understand this, but still can't get past it. Of course it only makes me want to try harder
One thing we should add to that diagram is fear. Fear is something so detrimental in all of our lives. Fear keeps us from accepting ourselves, keeps us back from doing things we want to do. And fear is just a big part of the ego, because the ego naturally does not want to get hurt.
They are all outflows of our base instincts and nature. We complicate things endlessly with our minds because we CAN. Through so doing we learn, though eventually it brings us back to a place of great simplicity, with much knowledge combined
From about 6-7 years to 11-12 is called the preoperational stage, in this stage children are learning how to see from other people perspectives (in all actuality it is a projection of themselves onto others that causes this) they start to learn morals or their own moral standards from this.